And The Walls Came Tumbling Down (Shield Series: Book 1)
by 4TheLoveOfFiction
Summary: Agent Ward unknowingly works for Hydra, infiltrating Coulson's team under false orders. Coulson recruits a new member to the team, insisting Ward be the one to mentor her. Ward had never planned on training anyone else after Skye nearly died and left the team, but cue Agent Willow Jamison-a woman on a mission for justice, and a past full of secrets waiting to be uncovered.
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them** **J** **Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 1:

 _Blood. There was so much blood. She screamed out for him to help her, pleading in the darkness—but he did nothing. He watched as the life drained from her eyes—drowning in the abyss of servitude and the pretense of loyalty. His chest was laid bare, his heart beating wildly, aching with the hurt of his entire existence. The growling rage and pain bubbled from his mouth as he begged for it all to end._

 _"_ _Please leave her alone! Take me! Please, take me!"_

 _And then, like a good little routine, she was there in a long flowing dress. She looked like an angel but he knew it was her._

 _"_ _Skye!" He called to her, but she didn't look at him._

 _The light radiated off of her like the sun and the man was there too. He kissed her softly on the forehead and she smiled up at him, twining her fingers in his and they began to walk away. He wanted to call out to her again and again, asking her to stay but his voice was lost. She was happy and alive and free, and that was all that mattered. This time he begged for it all to end for an entirely different reason._

 _A fatherly hand gripped his shoulder. A kind hand— one that wouldn't punish him. He looked up at the man and his reassuring smile almost eased his pain. Almost. He was tempted to walk away with him, but he waited a moment too long and suddenly there was more blood. It was pouring down the man's chest and he knelt by him. He called for help. The others were there now, but it was all wrong. They were dying. Their eyes were black and lifeless and they didn't come to him. They wouldn't help him no matter how much he screamed and begged. The darkness came for him and he was alone with nothing but his silent pleas. He was always alone._

Ward sat up straight in his bed, wiping the sweat from his forehead. The dreams weren't getting any better and quite frankly he wasn't sure how he was going to keep it up, never getting any decent rest. Sure, his entire childhood had been a series of nightmares, mostly real nightmares that carried over into his dreams—but this was different. This was a completely new kind of torment and he was fatigued in a subtle and excruciating way. He briefly thought about asking Simmons for something to help him sleep, but then he'd have to explain the whys, and that wasn't happening. The thought of talking about any of it made his skin crawl with anxiety. Glancing at his alarm clock he groaned. He still had two hours before he needed to be up, but he knew there wasn't any way he was going back to sleep. Today was the day the team headed to the Triskelion to determine their new recruit and he was absolutely, under no circumstances, looking forward to it. Swinging his legs over his bunk he mustered up the energy to take a quick shower and re-read over his next mission details. He just needed to survive one more day, and figure out the answers he needed to help the people he wasn't supposed to care about.


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them** **J** **Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 2

A searing pain shot through Willow Jamison's torso as her opponent landed a sickening blow to her midsection. She wanted to give up, but she knew she couldn't. Not now. Not after she had worked so damned hard to get to this moment. She had passed every written exam and was at the top of her class. She had survived the grueling psychological sessions with every world renowned "shrink" S.H.I.E.L.D. had at their disposal. Victory was the only option today- as it was the day that Director Coulson himself would handpick the next member of his team and Willow was determined to make the cut. Cadet Wesley Chamberlain and his hatred of her for being in the top of her class was the only thing standing in the way of finally getting redemption for the murder of her family—and there was absolutely nothing he could do, no amount of pain she wouldn't tolerate, to satisfy that thirst for justice.

Righting herself and taking a deep breath, she began to work through the pain. Wesley grinned at her and taunted with a "come hither" of his hand. They had been neck and neck through the entire academy training—she should have known they'd match the two of them up for this final battle. Willow rolled her eyes in annoyance and stepped forward in challenge. He threw a fist her direction but she side stepped it, missing her face by mere millimeters. It was enough time for her to grab him at the wrist and shoulder, using his own forward momentum to twist his arm backward sending him face planting into the mat. Her heel drove into the center of his back and she applied more force to his already awkwardly bent arm until he was screaming out in pain and forced to tap out. _One point team Willow, two more to go_ she thought triumphantly.

She stepped back waiting for him to stand, and when he turned to face her, his cocky grin was gone and all that was left was a rage in his eyes. She took a deep breath and crouched, waiting for his impending attack. When it finally came, she was ready. He threw a head kick that nearly collided with her throat but she dodged it just in time, countering with a powerful jab to his ribs that had him backing up—but she wasted no time. She charged forward, her arms wrapping around his middle and used her body weight to knock him to the floor on his back. Her fists rained down upon him and she knew she was doing significant damage—but his masculine advantage won out and he managed to flip them so he now had her pinned. She guarded herself as best she could but one of his fists connected with her jaw in just the right spot and she nearly went limp. The referee called it and point two went to Wesley. She briefly closed her eyes, focusing on nothing but her parents and brother. She couldn't let them down-they deserved to be avenged.

As she stood, she oriented herself to her surroundings, gathered her bearings and cleared the remaining fog that was left by Wesley's fist. Shaking her head she prepared. Wesley, true to his arrogant nature, winked at her mockingly. She wiped the blood from the corner of her mouth and her face hardened. This was it. This was her last chance. As he approached her, their fists and feet flew- each dodging and blocking the other's every attempt to incapacitate the other. Her fist connected with his temple and that sent him reeling back a few steps. She slipped in quickly, grabbing his head and yanking it down to meet her knee. She heard him groan in pain and relished in a moment of satisfaction that it would definitely leave him with a black eye. He almost landed a kidney shot with his knee but she caught his leg and slammed her fist into his inner thigh as hard as she could and he fell backward. Trying to capitalize on him being down she moved in but he grabbed her arm, similarly to what she had done in round one. Leave it to Wesley to copy her moves. She would have rolled her eyes as he pulled her down but as she attempted to tuck and roll with it, there was a resounding crack of the bones in her wrist. She nearly collapsed from the pain and that was all he needed. He spun around behind her, digging his arm in under her chin in a rear-naked choke hold. She fought him as hard as she could with every maneuver she had, but not much worked against a choke hold that deep. She was seeing spots from the lack of oxygen but she managed to get a good elbow into his rib cage and she felt the crunch and his own gasp for air. His hold tightened and everything started to go fuzzy. He was taunting her in her ear.

"Just tap Willow. Taste your demise you stupid bitch." He snarled.

With a final gasp she managed to breathe out the words "screw you"—and then everything went black.


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 3

"Well that was pretty interesting, I must say." Director Phil Coulson said taking a seat at the head of the conference table, waiting for the rest of his team to be seated so they could discuss their choices for the new S.H.I.E.L.D. team member.

"I like the girl."

Agent Melinda May, better known as "The Cavalry", spoke first- unsurprisingly as she was Coulson's right hand, not only in the field but off as well. They had been through more missions together than anyone and had survived the toughest situations, creating an inseparable bond between the two. You never saw Director Coulson without Agent May. She earned her name by single handedly taking out an entire army force in Bahrain, but looking at her you wouldn't guess it. Her Asian background gave her a petite frame. She had long dark hair and a wicked scowl on her face most of the time to match it. Make no mistake- she was a force to be reckoned with. You didn't walk into a room with the Cavalry and walk out unscathed.

"We do too" Declared Fitzsimmons simultaneously. Leopold Fitz, engineer and weapons guru, and Jemma Simmons, biochemist and life science specialist made up the part of the team that had all the answers. If those two couldn't figure it out, no one could. The team had adopted calling them Fitzsimmons, because the duo couldn't be separated-not mentally, physically or even in this case verbally. They were known for always completing each other's sentences. It was quite the running joke amongst them.

"I, for one didn't like the way the man spoke to her at the end. How rude!" Simmons admonished, her British accent adding spice to her argument.

"Bloody hell. What kind of teammate would he be, if he's speaking to his fellow cadets in that manner? I agree with Jemma." Fitz made a face of disgust.

"Bobbi? Hunter? Thoughts?" Coulson probed.

Bobbi Morse and Lance Hunter were ex-husband and wife. Both agents had decided that work life made married life too complicated. They still worked together like a well-oiled machine and pulled off co-existing far better than most could. In some ways it made them stronger without that mental attachment—even though everyone knew they still loved each other relentlessly. Marriage certificate or not, they'd always be Bobbi and Hunter, Hunter and Bobbi.

"I don't know….I'd have to say the guy. He beat her fair and square." Bobbie shrugged.

"You just want someone you can practice your batons on." Hunter smirked "I read his file too, Bobs. He scored higher than you did-don't think I don't see the challenge in your eyes." He winked, earning a scowl from his ex-wife.

"Maybe I should practice them on you…." Bobbi muttered.

"Man, you two still fight like an old married couple." Mack, lead mechanic, teased the pair. "You sure you don't still have that certificate somewhere?"

"Har …har…. har…" Hunter pretended to punch Mack's shoulder. Of course he pretended, because Mack was built like a freight train. He was nearly 6'4" and 250lbs. You didn't mess with Alphonso "Mack" MacKenzie.

"I vote for whichever one has the best percentages. One fight doesn't give us a clear picture of the person. Who can shoot? Who can kill a man and eat ice cream and watch movies the same night? Ya know what I'm sayin'? It's not that cut and dry for me." Mack reasoned.

"All valid points." Coulson nodded. "Ward, you've been awfully quiet. Care to chime in?"

"Do we even really need anyone else?" Agent Grand Ward's face was hard and uncaring, as it usually was. He preferred working alone-everyone knew that, so the thought of adding anyone else to the list of people he had to "babysit" just irritated him.

"I know that Skye choosing to ride off into the sunset with Lincoln left a hole in this team. She was family to us all and maybe to others…she was more." Coulson nodded pointedly at Ward and his wince at the mention of her wasn't lost on anyone.

"Look, this has nothing to do with Skye, I assure you. She's happy wherever she is and that's fine by me. I just don't see why we need more people. We work well enough together without adding a wild card into the mix." Ward leaned back into his chair, his hands folding casually behind his neck.

"If you had to choose one, who would it be? We're not replacing Skye. That isn't what this is." Coulson prodded, knowingly. Agent Ward thought for a moment.

"I would choose Cadet Jamison."

"Interesting choice. Elaborate please….." Director Coulson stood and was pacing the room now.

"She didn't tap."

"That's your reason?" Bobbi rolled her eyes.

"She distinctly and purposefully didn't tap-even with a broken wrist and the fact that she knew it would be lights out. She's resolved. Her mind isn't weak like Cadet Chamberlain. She could have taken him and she would with better training. Her scores are higher in marksmanship. Pound for pound she's the better athlete. I guarantee you with a little bit of honing her skills in combat, she would outsmart him 10 out of 10 times. As Mack said, one fight doesn't give the clear picture..." Agent Ward glanced at the ceiling, realizing he probably said too much.

"All right, that sums this up I think. I have a lot to consider and I'll take all views into consideration. We'll meet back in the morning for the final decision. After that, it's back to the BUS and on to the next H.Y.D.R.A. takedown. We'll be wheels up by tomorrow night." Coulson dismissed everyone for the evening to enjoy being at the Triskelion, aka S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters while he decided who to trust and bring aboard their tight-knit team.

He knew bringing up Skye was touchy, but necessary. Agent Ward had been her Senior Officer and denied any feelings he had for her. Ward never talked about it, but Coulson was pretty sure he had suffered a broken heart over her leaving— especially after he'd watched her being shot in the stomach twice and almost witnessed her death. But Ward carried on, delving back into his old self—always wanting to work alone and never wanting to have attachments. Coulson had wondered for quite some time how he could bring back the Grant Ward the team was missing-and now he thought he might have the perfect way to do it. A smile crossed his face as his decision became resolute.


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 4

Willow woke up on a cot in the medical bay and sat up, immediately regretting it. Her head felt like a bomb exploded inside it and a wave of dizziness washed over her, accompanied by a side of nausea. She glanced down at her wrist that had been casted and it all starting rushing back to her. The choke hold. Wesley telling her to tap.

She lost.

She _lost_. Director Coulson would never choose her now. She'd blown it. Anger got the best of her and she jumped up stupidly and stumbled past the nurse.

"Cadet Jamison you really need to lay down!"

"I'll lay down when I'm dead." Willow snapped, pushing herself out the door and down the hallway. Traitorous tears ran hot down her face and as she turned the corner she ran right smack into someone. As if she needed any more reasons to want to crawl into a hole and die today, she glanced up and was met with dark brown eyes. Those eyes were attached to a very attractive man, lean but muscular with dark hair that was in perfect disarray and the most kissable jaw.

"Cadet Jamison." The man stated jarring her out of her drug induced fantasy thoughts. _What the hell is wrong with me?! Did Wesley give me brain damage? Ugh. And how does he know me?_

"I…umm…..yes. I'm so sorry." Willow stammered. The world was still spinning and she almost fell into the wall next to them, but the man gripped her shoulders, holding her upright.

"Are you alright?" He questioned, giving her the once over.

"Oh…you're really strong….." She murmured stupidly. "I just….need to get to my room…" Her eyes were getting heavier by the second as she started to walk. The man watched her cautiously and about halfway down the hallway he decided she definitely shouldn't be walking alone. Rolling his eyes in aggravation, he caught up with her about the time the nurse was yelling at the other end of the hallway that she needed to lay down. He volunteered to help her to her room since he was already there, and somehow the frail little nurse didn't strike him as the type that could lift more than ten pounds. The nurse shook her head in frustration but waved him on.

"Thank you kindly sir, but I think I can take it from…." She would have collapsed if he hadn't caught her. They had sedated her, he'd guessed. That was pretty standard protocol after being choked out like that, seeing as how the headache that usually followed was like a hurricane inside your skull-once they decided your brain was okay, of course.

"I'm going to get you inside. You need to lie down. You just got rear-naked choked until you passed out. Give yourself a little time to recover, trust me." He said, using her badge to open her door. He scooped her up and tried not to think about the way her body felt against him as he carried her and laid her on her bunk. She winced in pain as she caught herself on her broken wrist. "Shit, I'm sorry!"

"…s'okay. Doesn't matter anyway. I've ruined everything. They could cut my arm off and I wouldn't….even ….care…." She slurred sleepily. "Who are you?"

"It doesn't matter who I am. What matters is that you get some rest. "

He somehow didn't think this was an appropriate time to tell her that he was Agent Grant Ward of Director Coulson's team. He pulled a blanket off the chair across the room and covered her with it. He stood there awkwardly, unsure what to do at this point.

"I should….go."

"Please stay." Her eyes drifted closed. "Just for a bit. I've had a …really….bad day. I hate being alone…always alone."

Something about those words felt like a sucker punch to the gut. He opened his mouth to say something, but thought better of it. He really didn't think he should be here-and yet, he couldn't make himself leave her like that. Not in her present condition. He could go get the nurse from the med bay, but he wasn't so sure she should even be working in the med bay. After all, she had lost a drugged up patient. He finally decided he could stay for a little bit, it couldn't hurt anything and nobody would miss him. He moved to the chair and propped his feet up on the nearby desk, watching her sleep.

Agent Ward couldn't help but notice the scar above her eye and wondered how she got it. Maybe it was from the academy. And what had she meant about always being alone? Surely she had friends and family, or a boyfriend even.

Ward stared out the window in a futile attempt to not think about the dark haired girl sleeping not even 5 feet from him. He made up his mind that he would stay for a few hours to make sure she was alright, and then be gone before she woke up. _Yeah, he definitely didn't want to be there for that._ About an hour into his watch, she became restless and was shouting out in her sleep. She cried out for her mom, dad and someone named Liam. She had screamed once, begging someone "not to do it". He tried to wake her but she wouldn't. He was about two seconds from going to get the nurse anyway when she grabbed his hand in her state of unrest. He was startled by the contact but her grip was fierce. Unsure of what to do, he rubbed his thumb gently over the top of her knuckles and whispered softly that she was okay. After a minute or two of this she finally calmed and fell back into restful sleep. He spent the next several hours studying her, multiple scenarios running through his mind about her nightmare.

Around 3am, Agent Ward decided he had stayed long enough. He shouldn't have even been there in the first place he kept reminding himself—it was stupid of him. She was sleeping peacefully, so he detached his hand from hers and stood to leave, disturbed by the feeling that washed over him at the loss of contact. Shrugging it off, he set her alarm clock next to her bed for 6am. Hopefully that would wake her in time for the announcement of Coulson's decision. _Coulson's decision._ He hadn't even stopped to consider that he might actually choose the girl. Would this be weird later? He didn't tell her his name, and maybe she wouldn't remember any of it. He could only hope. The last thing he needed was someone thinking he gave a damn. Agent Grant Ward didn't have time for that shit. He wasn't allowed to have attachments-this was a job, nothing more.

* * *

The most annoying buzzing sound woke Willow from her slumber. Fumbling to shut off the offending noise, she bumped her broken wrist on the alarm clock and nearly screamed out in pain.

"Fuuu-dge that fudging hurts like a gahhhhhh….." She exclaimed, bringing her other hand up to her head in an attempt to dull the pain there as well. After a moment of orienting herself, her eyes fixed on the chair that was next to the bed. There had been someone with her, she was sure of it. Or, had she dreamed it? _No wait, there HAD to have been someone. Who set my alarm for me?_ She vaguely remembered a man-a man who held her hand. She would have contemplated that more, but when she realized what time it was she practically jumped from the bed to get dressed. She had to get to the announcement meeting—even though she knew she wouldn't be picked. That thought devastated her. Losing to Wesley meant that she would have to spend the next year trying to prove that she was worthy of being a field agent. Maybe they'd ship her to Japan to the newest S.H.I.E.L.D. facility. Her heart sank. She wanted to get the bad guys off the streets, and Director Coulson's team was S.H.I.E.L.D. renowned for doing just that. She wanted justice for her family-and she had disappointed herself and everyone she loved. She stood in front of the mirror and that's when the tears began to roll down her face. She couldn't stop the sobs that racked her body. _This couldn't be happening_.


	5. Chapter 5

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 5

Agent Ward made his way to the front row of chairs in the giant auditorium and took a seat next to Hunter and Bobbi.

"Party hard, Ward? You look like you haven't slept at all." Hunter winked suggestively, to which Ward grumbled in annoyance. If he only knew.

About that time, Coulson and Agent May arrived, May taking a seat while Coulson headed to the podium up front. The cadets were all sitting on the opposite side of the room and he scanned the rows of students for the girl with the blue-gray eyes he'd spent the night with. Well, not _spent the_ _night_ , but whatever. He hoped the alarm was enough to wake her up from her drugged up stupor. He made a mental note to ask what the hell they gave her because it seemed absolutely excessive, possibly even dangerous. He saw Cadet Chamberlain walking to his seat up front. His arrogant smirk all over his face and the way he carried himself proved that he believed he was already part of Team Coulson. He vividly imagined knocking that smirk off his face. Of course that was only because he was thinking about being cooped up on the BUS with that asshole for the next however long. Or the thought of him being the one he'd have to rely on to have his six. The alternative, however, was even worse, especially after he'd made the epic mistake of helping Cadet Jamison. _Speaking of her_ , wh _ere was she?_

It was then that she took her place in the chair next to Cadet Chamberlain. He could see she hated every minute of it by the way her entire body was rigid and her face was hard. He recognized that look-it was the look he often wore to keep everyone at bay. The alarm must have woken her in time because she looked freshly showered and mostly rested. Cadet Chamberlain leaned in and whispered something in her ear and even though she didn't budge, the murder in her eyes was raw and raging. For some reason Ward wanted to go to them. The pull was strong, but he kept himself planted firmly in his chair. 

Apparently he was watching the altercation too closely, because her stormy eyes locked on his for a moment and he could have sworn she might have remembered him, but then she casually looked away as Coulson started to speak. Ward's attention went to the stage.

"Good morning! Thank you to all of you who are here this morning in an effort to serve S.H.I.E.L.D. and to valiantly protect the world. You have all trained exceptionally hard and we admire your persistence and dedication to our program.

As you all know, my team has been looking for a new recruit and the search has been a long and grueling process. We've watched each one of you. We've gone over all the stats and spent hours determining who would plug directly into our well established group. Obviously there can only be one of you, even though we would be fortunate to have any of you with us. Each one of you has a purpose within our outstanding organization and if you are not picked today, it's because you are equally as needed elsewhere.

Without further ado, we narrowed it down to our top two finalists. Cadet Wesley Chamberlain and Cadet Willow Jamison, please rise."

The two cadets stood. Cadet Chamberlain was grinning from ear to ear and Cadet Jamison was still wearing a blank expression, most likely trying to keep her emotions in check.

"Both of you have worked extremely hard. You have been put to every test known to man and excelled—which is why this decision was such a tough one."

Ward hadn't realized he was holding his breath. He honestly didn't know what he wanted to happen. Agent May nudged him and he looked at her curiously.

"You look nervous….you ok?" May whispered. Agent Ward nodded, giving her a typical Ward eye roll for good measure. She quirked an eyebrow at him in question but he ignored her.

"After much consideration, on behalf of S.H.I.E.L.D.…"

Cadet Jamison closed her eyes to ignore her impending defeat, as Cadet Chamberlain took an overzealous step forward to acknowledge his victory.

"We would like to welcome _Agent_ Willow Jamison to our team."

Ward let out a small laugh as the realization hit Cadet Chamberlain like a mack truck and shock replaced the blank expression on Cadet, now Agent Jamison's face. Everyone was clapping and Coulson called her up to the stage. He shook her hand and the smile on her face was absolutely radiant. After the ceremony, she was out in the commons area being congratulated by her peers and instructors. Coulson called the team up to introduce everyone- Fitzsimmons taking to her immediately, as anticipated. Simmons probably gave her the most life sucking hug she'd ever experience and the look on her face told Ward that he was right. Agent Jamison greeted everyone politely and with just the right amount of nervousness one would expect given the situation. Hunter accidentally tried to grab her broken wrist and they did an odd dance with their hands before laughing and giving up. Her laugh was refreshing, Ward thought to himself. It reminded him of Skye in a way, and that thought made his smile fade.

"And this, Agent Jamison …is Agent Grant Ward."

"It's an honor to…meet you." She shook his hand, pausing at the familiarity and looked up to meet his eyes. Ward plastered on his smoothest smile, after all he _was_ second in espionage only to Agent Romanoff—who just happened to be an Avenger. "Have we…"

"Met? Not a chance." Ward plastered on his warmest smile. He could tell she was thinking too hard about it and that worried him. He really didn't need the new girl thinking he was something he wasn't.

She nodded politely, but there was still questioning in her eyes. Everyone was now looking at each other awkwardly.

"Don't mind Ward, here. His social skills are something to be desired—we rarely let him off his leash." Hunter teased and Ward of course, rolled his eyes. "See there, the eye roll. It's his signature move." Willow chuckled softly.

Ward gave Hunter a look that said he was three seconds from kicking his ass.

"Annnnnd there's the look that says he wants to kill me, which is also his trademark." Hunter winked.

"Well, I have some signature scowls of my own. Better watch out, I might just do it better." Willow teased, earning a questioning smirk from Agent Ward.

"Sounds like we have a challenge on our hands …."Fitz blew out a playful breath. "I'll get the popcorn while we watch how this plays out then." Everyone laughed. Willow couldn't help but think how good it felt just to laugh, and with strangers that would now be her superiors and teammates. It felt too good to be true.

"Alright, now that we've all been so kindly introduced…" Coulson grinned. "Agent Jamison, if you'd like to gather your things. We'll be wheels up this evening and you'll get the grand tour of the BUS."

"Yes sir. I can't thank you enough for this opportunity." She nodded politely and turned to head for her quarters to pack.

"I think she'll fit in nicely. Good call Ward." Coulson patted Ward's shoulder in friendly jest. He would have responded, but out of the corner of his eye he saw Cadet Chamberlain approach Willow. All it took was him placing his fingers offensively around her broken wrist and Ward was on the move, leaving the rest of the team watching in confusion. Ward's own fingers latched onto Cadet Chamberlain's bicep so tight he was sure he was cutting off his circulation.

"What the—"

"I'd say if you know what's good for you, you won't finish that sentence." Ward's voice was low and calm, which made it all the more threatening. It probably didn't help that Ward towered over him like some dark prince who was there to save the day. The cadet's grip dissipated from Willow's wrist and she stood there wide-eyed and in total shock. "Agent Jamison, you're free to go. Cadet Chamberlain and I need to have a little chat."

"I don't—" She started, but he cut her off with a stern scowl that warned he meant it. Willow did as she was told- looking back over her shoulder only once to make sure Agent Ward hadn't murdered Wesley in cold blood.

" _You_ on the other hand….don't look at her. Don't touch her. Don't even breathe the same air as her or I will make you so _very_ sorry. She may have lost that fight to you, but know that she will outrank and outperform you on every level for the rest of your life. I don't want to see your face again for the rest of the time I'm here. Got it?!"

The young man stared angrily at him.

"I _said_ …..got it?" Ward's glare was menacing.

"Y-yes sir." Wesley answered. Agent Ward let him go and watched as he cowered away down the hall.

Ward felt a grip on his shoulder and Coulson appeared next to him.

"Care to explain what that was all about?" Coulson grinned as though he knew something Ward didn't. It quite frankly pissed him off.

"That guy is an asshole, sir. We definitely made the right choice. With Agent May as her trainer, she will wipe the floor with him someday." Ward fumed, not even completely sure why in the hell he was so angry.

"Who said anything about May training her?" There was that stupid grin again.

"Wait…what?! What are you getting at Coulson?" Agent Ward's heart rate sped up. Panic started to set in.

Coulson waggled his eyebrows in that goofy way of his that said "you already know and I'm the boss so there's nothing you can do about it".

"No. Just...no.…you can't be serious. This isn't….I can't do this again. Coulson—"

"Agent Ward….you are hereby declared Agent Jamison's SO."

Ward's jaw clenched like a vice. This couldn't happen. He didn't want to train her-or anyone for that matter-not after what happened before. He wasn't cut out for this shit. Grant Ward worked alone—people didn't get hurt that way.

"Before you decide to argue, I've given this a lot of thought. Trust me, Ward- this is the right call to make."

Ward took a deep breath and looked up to the ceiling trying to calm the anger bubbling up inside him. When he finally trusted himself, he looked Coulson dead in the eyes.

"I sure hope you know what you're doing….because if something happens to her under my watch, that's on you."

"She's not Skye." Coulson called to him as he stormed off.

"You sure this isn't a mistake?" Agent May asked, walking up behind him. "He might not be fit to handle this. Everything about the girl makes him uncomfortable. He was barely even breathing when you made the announcement."

"Oh, he can handle it-and Ward being uncomfortable is exactly what I'm counting on." The corner of his mouth turned up into a plotting, guilty smile.

"If you say so." May blew out a disbelieving breath. "I need to speak with you about the H.Y.D.R.A. base they just discovered in Wales."

"Wales?" He quirked an eyebrow in question. "Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"These roaches seem to pop up just about anywhere and everywhere these days. Let's talk."


	6. Chapter 6

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 6

"Look John, I've been on this team for two years. You'd think if I was going to find any evidence pointing to Coulson being a Hydra mole, I'd have found something by now. The man is squeaky clean." Agent Ward paced the floor of his quarters. He could practically feel the angry stare from John through the phone.

"You're falling for his good guy act-they always do. And here I thought that you were actually up to this task. You don't want to disappoint me do you?"

It was always the guilt card. If Ward didn't owe him his entire existence, he would seriously hate him for it.

"I don't hear an answer, kid!" John snapped.

"Of course not! You know that!" Ward's jaw tightened, trying not to lash out. If he did, he'd definitely regret it later. "I just….I have a really hard time believing that Coulson and this team are corrupt. Do you have anything new? Maybe you could talk with Agent Hand again. I mean, the man has saved mine and their lives countless times. He is always on the up and up and he does what has to be done. I've never seen anyone uphold the ideology of S.H.I.E.L.D. more than him." That, and the fact that Coulson had been the most positive role model he'd had in his entire life—he had even at some point found him to be a friend of sorts, which had really screwed up his mission in about a hundred different ways. If John figured out that Ward actually cared about Coulson and his team, it'd definitely be game over.

"Listen to you defending him like some little obedient puppy." John practically growled. "I should pull you from this mission and send you back to the woods for a little refresher course. Have you forgotten that I _own_ you, Agent Ward? You have three more months to find out where he's hiding that drug or you're officially yanked from the mission and demoted in rank. If you want to be a lap dog to Coulson, I'll remind you of the hand that fed you all these years. You're failing S.H.I.E.L.D. by not figuring this out. We're on borrowed time son, and you're failing the world."

The secure line went dead and Ward stood there staring blankly at the phone for several minutes, letting the weight of everything pile upon his shoulders. He had always trusted John Garrett. John was the man that rescued him from his fucked up childhood and recruited him, giving him a purpose within S.H.I.E.L.D. But the longer this mission went on, the more unsettled he became. The lack of information being given, the desperation that radiated off of John in waves was leaving a very nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach. There just had to be something that he wasn't seeing—an explanation that could scratch Coulson and his team, correction, the team he had infiltrated, off as enemy number one. He _HAD_ to find the answer and fast.

He was jolted from his thoughts when there was a soft knock at his door. Composing himself, he opened the door to find none other than Agent Jamison standing outside his room. She smiled brightly, but it quickly faded once she took in the serious look on his face.

"I—I'm very sorry to bother you, sir. Agent May just sent me up here to give you my full transcript since she said you'll be my SO." She handed him the giant, worn out manila file folder. He remained silent, which made her even more uncomfortable. "Um, I guess I'll just be going then—unless of course you need me. Then I'm all yours—wait, that sounded-" His eyebrow quirked, a smile threatening to break through his stern facade. A traitorous blush crept across her cheeks. "Totally shutting up now. Happy reading."

She turned abruptly to walk away, but turned back one more time. "However, if that bible of my life mentions anything about my love of a bear named Snuffles-it's totally not true. Just saying." And just like that, she was gone.

Without saying a word, he shut the door and stared at the picture on the top of the file. Somehow, this girl was going to be the death of him, he just knew it. He wasn't sure what it was, but she was more than he wanted to deal with—especially right now with the way John was acting. It wasn't the training that terrified him- it was that he feared she would inevitably expect him to be more human than he was allowed to be. Agent Skye had tried—and look where that got her. It wasn't lost on him that the moment John had realized that Skye had been a bit of a distraction that she had ended up with two bullets in the stomach. He had carried the burden with him all this time and it was eating away at him slowly, but John had always denied any involvement—and Ward couldn't prove it. John was a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent, he had reminded himself. Killing wasn't what they were about. Either way, he didn't need anyone else getting hurt because he couldn't protect them. He couldn't turn his back on the man that rescued him, but over the course of his stay on the BUS with Coulson's team—he had begun questioning his own loyalty, and what it truly meant to be rescued. He had never been so confused about who to trust and what to believe—but John Garrett had always been there from the time he was young. That loyalty had to trump anything and everything, he knew that-but John would hate Willow just as he hated Skye if Ward showed even an ounce of attachment—he was sure of it. He would probably say that she was an unneeded distraction and it would always somehow come down to the mission. The GH-325. The drug that John was so eager to get his hands on, in the name of world safety.

He had to keep Agent Jamison at a distance, but as he stayed awake that night reading her file, he realized that was going to be easier said than done. Her childhood rivaled his own, the pain she endured and survived was commendable, and he couldn't help but laugh out loud when he came across the picture of the teenage Willow holding onto a bear with a name embroidered on the front that read "Snuffles".


	7. Chapter 7

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 7

Willow had been so eager to climb on the Boeing C-17 Globemaster III. It was literally Director Coulson's mobile command station and it certainly did not disappoint. It was almost as if the air inside demanded a certain respect-like you were just plain lucky to be breathing it all in. She ran her fingers lightly across the surface of the holotable.

"Hands off the holotable, missy!" Her hands flew to the air in mock surrender as she was met with the smiling face of Agent Fitz. "I'm just jokin' with ya…sort of…it takes a certain degree of training to even be able to turn the bloody thing on. We don't even let Coulson near it." He winked and she blew out a breath, lowering her hands.

"And here I thought I'd be kicked off the plane before I had even settled into my bunk." She smirked. "But umm…the button to turn it on is on the left hand side of the table next to the thumbprint scanner, of course it's nearly invisible to the naked eye."

Fitz's eyebrows raised in curiosity and surprise.

"What? They have books in spy school." She grinned. "And I happened to have had a wholeeee lot of free time."

"Well, well…..it seems we have another brainiac on board." He called to Jemma as she entered the room.

"I don't know if I'd go that far." Willow laughed. "I certainly don't have a PhD background, but I do know my way around a library. My father always used to say it's not about knowing the answer, but knowing how to find it." Her heart clenched at the memory of her Dad, but she didn't let it show.

"Your father sounds like an intelligent man." Jemma nodded, smiling.

"Yes, he was." She replied, the awkwardness suddenly rising to uncomfortable levels. "So, I know I can't be of much use out in the field or in combat training until I'm healed, but if there is anything you need from me don't hesitate to ask. I'm pretty good with a laptop and I do have a smidge of interest in engineering. I like tinkering with things and figuring out how they work. Also, my mother was a medical doctor so I'm not afraid of wounds or petri dishes for that matter. I'm at your complete and utter disposal."

"That is quite literally the best news I've heard in ages!" Jemma's smile was the brightest she'd ever seen. "You don't know how refreshing it is to have an agent on the team that isn't deterred by science and biology!"

"Careful there Jem…" Fitz warned. "Your grin is literally making my cheeks hurt."

"Oh rubbish. I saw the look on your face at her mentioning tinkering-as if that doesn't give you an absolute thrill!" The biochemist retorted.

Willow watched the two bicker back and forth playfully for a moment until Agent Hunter caught her attention.

"If you'd like a break from the dynamic duo over here, I can take you on a tour of the rest of the plane." He chuckled knowingly. Fitz and Simmons seemed unfazed by his comment, not even taking a breath to stop arguing in the only thing that could be described as science-y terms.

"Lead the way." She laughed, following him out the door.

"They're always like that. You'll get used to it." He winked. "What we've got here is the gym. I'm sure you'll be in here a lot once your wrist is healed up. We also spar in here."

"Is it open 24 hours a day?"

"Are you planning on training 'round the clock?" He teased.

"You never know." She laughed, shrugging her shoulders.

"I can see it now-you're going to put all the rest of us agents to shame."

"You're damn right I am." She winked.

"That's if she survives Ward's training." Bobbi piped up, making her way to the treadmill. What was it with the females? They were always Willow's toughest crowd.

"Don't listen to her. She's still bummed that she can't challenge that tool Chamberlin to a baton match." Hunter quipped.

"Training doesn't intimidate me. It's a learning experience." Willow smiled sweetly, but there was a certain edge to it. "And I wouldn't be so worried about Wesley's baton score. He had the instructor paid off by his rich daddy. He never beat me once."

"Ohhhh snap. You hear that Bobs? Your challenge awaits you."

"Or we could still just go with my idea, and use the batons on you…." Bobbi winked at Willow, easing the tension between them for which she was grateful.

"You're just gonna side with her like that, aye?" Hunter joked.

"Well ya know, chicks before dicks…." Willow shrugged and Hunter grabbed at his chest in mock hurt.

"I changed my mind. I like her." Bobbi smirked putting on her earbuds. "And if you need any help with Ward, just let me know."

"Wait…..Bobs. Bobbi. What the bloody hell does that even mean? Have you got a secret thing for Wardy-Poo now, or what? I know he's all tall, dark and handsome but …."

"Sorry dude, I don't think she's even listening."

"Yeah well, she never listened to me when we were married either."

"Wait…." Willow pointed back and forth between them with raised eyebrows. "You two were married?"

"It's a reallllllly long story. One that requires a realllllllly big bottle of rum." Hunter said slinging his arm around her shoulder as they made their way out of the gym to the kitchen. It took about another hour to make their way around the BUS, but she felt like she had a pretty good handle on the layout. The takeoff was surprisingly smooth, and she credited that to the piloting skills of Agent May. She had heard so many amazing things about her, but she'd also heard that you should definitely stay out of her way. Her limited time with Agent May had definitely been intimidating to say the least.

She spent a couple of hours putting away her things in her quarters, trying to calm her nerves. She had so much left to prove, but she was determined. Glancing down at her broken wrist she scowled. Normally, she'd take out her emotions on the punching bag, but that was going to be out of the question for quite some time thanks to Wesley, the grade A asshole. She wished she had been there to see what went down between him and Agent Ward. To say she'd been surprised when he'd jumped in and forced Wesley to let her go, was the understatement of the century—and his expression had been downright terrifying, yet she didn't feel afraid. Something about his dark chocolate eyes and the way her hand had felt in his when they shook, it was all too familiar. Maybe she was just crazy, or exhausted from the events of the last two days. Either way, she dozed off wondering what it was going to be like training under Agent Grant Ward.


	8. Chapter 8

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 8

Ward was up at 5am on the dot. He was always the first one up and he figured this would be great time to break in his trainee. If she thought it was going to be smooth sailing training under him, she had another thing coming. His pulse quickened, remembering how much Skye hated getting woken up at this time. It would take 20 minutes to get her motivated and another 20 minutes of her whining all the way to the gym-however Willow wouldn't be sparring for a few weeks, so he planned to work on interrogation and other skills. He shook his head as if to clear his thoughts of his previous "rookie" as he made his way to her room. To his surprise, the door was wide open, the bed was made and Agent Jamison was nowhere to be found.

Making his way across the BUS, he found her in the last place he'd expected. She was kicking the shit out of the bags in the gym with pinpoint accuracy. He recognized the fury in her eyes, the way she was fighting the demon in her head the only way she knew how. When she finally looked up and realized she was being watched, her face flushed crimson.

"Morning Agent Jamison."

"Good morning Agent Ward, Sir." She replied, wiping the sweat from her brow. "I hope using the gym at this hour isn't a problem."

"Actually, if your wrist wasn't broken, I'd have been on my way to get you to bring you down here-but I can see you don't have a problem with being an early riser."

"Not at all, Sir."

"You don't have to call me Sir. We'll have a strict training regimen, but I'm not going to hold you to formalities. Ward or Agent Ward is fine by me."

"Then please, call me Willow. I'm still getting used to being called Agent, but I prefer my teammates call me Willow." She smiled softly. Ward nodded, returning the smile.

"Very well then, Willow. You do realize Simmons would have my head if she knew you were in this gym training."

"Not to be rude, but it's only my wrist that is broken. There are plenty of other things that need conditioning while I'm healing and though I'm sure Agent Simmons means well, I'm not sure she grasps that."

So she was polite _and_ headstrong.

"I can understand that. Maybe we can keep that between us for now, as long as you promise under no circumstance that you will use that wrist."

"I promise." She nodded resolutely.

"Are you finished here, or do you need more time? I was thinking we could start by going over interrogation skills for the first week or two so I can get an idea of your baseline." He asked, looking over his tablet with notes from her file.

"I'm good. I've been in here for two hours already. I could probably use a five minute shower though, unless you prefer working with someone that looks and smells like a sweaty gym locker." She wrinkled her nose, glancing down at her soaking wet shirt.

"You've been down here since 3am?" He questioned, surprise and curiosity getting the better of him.

"I um…sometimes I can't sleep. So I like to use the time to train and focus." She admitted, seemingly a bit embarrassed. He couldn't help his expression of total understanding. Something inside of him shifted as he genuinely took in her appearance for the first time that morning. Her hair was pulled back and loose tendrils hung by her face that were sweat covered from her hard work. Her blue-gray eyes were bright, despite the slightly darkened circles under them indicating her admitted lack of sleep. Her white S.H.I.E.L.D. academy t-shirt was drenched and clinging to her petite, yet toned body. Not allowing himself to follow that train of thought, he once again put his focus back on the tablet in his hand, pretending read something on it.

"I also tend to have that problem, so maybe I'll be around when you come down here-but that doesn't get you out of training later in the day." He smirked, glancing back up at her.

She licked her lips, rolling her eyes challenging him playfully. "Bring it on Agent Ward."

A cocky smile spread across his face.

"You're so going to wish you hadn't said that." He called out, his back to her as he headed out of the room. "Interrogation room in ten. Don't be late."


	9. Chapter 9

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 9

"I seriously hate you." She closed her eyes, her back flat on the mat, pinned beneath Ward's knee.

"Don't lie. You love it when I best you." He chuckled, standing up and reached down to give her a hand. She laid there unmoving.

"I'm not getting up. Not now. Not ever."

"Oh yes you are, unless you want to add about 25 burpees to the long list of strength training you still have left to do today." He wagered. Her hand reached for his and she pulled herself up, accidentally coming nose to nose with him…..well, forehead to chin because he was quite a bit taller than her.

"That's so unfair. You know how much I hate burpees, not to mention, it's not like that's ever going to help me in a fight." She grumbled. " _Oh yes stupid Hydra agent that's trying to kill me, just wait one moment while I do these twelve thousand burpees to prepare for my imminent demise._ " She said in a high falsetto voice, mockingly.

He tipped her chin up with his finger to look him in the eye.

"Have I mentioned lately how big of a pain in the ass you are?"

"Just twice today. I'd say I'm slacking." She sassed and his eyes narrowed before shaking his head with a laugh he couldn't help. Something about her made him do that, no matter how hard he tried not to.

"Alright, enough back talking princess, let's have another go."

She groaned, backing up to her side of the mat as she prepared for his attack.

For the first two weeks he had grilled her in the interrogation room, teaching her both how to ask the questions and how to not answer questions if she was ever taken hostage. He'd definitely put the pressure on far worse than any professor at the academy. She'd even gone back to her bunk and cried the first day, but she picked herself back up and tried again. She survived every threat he threw at her, every emotional tactic he had, even bringing up past events of her childhood and she hadn't caved. She might have hated him for it for a while, but she understood why. He was making her stronger. Agent Ward had been pretty stoic the first few days after her arrival on the BUS, but after working closely with her day in and day out, he'd started to warm up. She could tell that he kept to himself most of the time, but he'd taken to meeting her in the gym in the early morning and they would run on the treadmills in silent partnership. After a few weeks their routine had become a well-oiled machine, and she knew exactly what he expected of her.

The day she'd finally gotten Simmons to clear her for combat training, she'd gone to bed so sore she thought she was going to die. When she had told Ward to bring it, she certainly had no idea how bad she was going to regret that statement, but she was getting faster every single day, and she knew it was only a matter of time before she beat him. Even Agent May had complimented her skills and that had boosted her self-esteem tenfold. If the Cavalry was impressed, she was definitely doing something right.

* * *

"Send me in. I can get to him, Sir." She pleaded with Director Coulson.

"No!" Ward practically shouted into the coms. "Absolutely not. There's no reason for more than one person to die today."

"Seriously Ward. Now is NOT the time to be—"

"As your SO, I demand you keep your ass on that BUS."

"Unless we can come up with another way, I'm sending her, Agent Ward." Coulson nodded in affirmation to Willow. She swallowed down her nerves.

"Coulson…." Ward's voice was angry.

"Wait! Ward, can you make it toward the southeast entrance? I think I see a way out." Willow asked, staring at the map on the screen.

"Not without a way through the steel door in front of me. It's sealed tighter than Fort Knox. Has Fitz made it out yet? He might be able to take out the security."

"Not yet. He's trapped on the other side of the building. If I can get you out, you can help him. Let me see what I can do." Willow grabbed the nearest laptop and pulled up the building's schematics. She was rusty, but her SO was in the line of fire with no way out and all she could do was try. She could hear gunfire and the sound of grunts and bodies hitting the ground.

"Umm…Coulson, I've got eyes on a chitauri gun."

"Crap." Coulson muttered. "Can you acquire it?"

"Sure. No problem. Piece of cake." He grumbled. "Just avoid the gunfire and fourteen Hydra agents, acquire a piece of alien technology that could blast me into oblivion and escape through a door that won't open. Sounds awesome."

"Agent Ward, do you trust me?" Willow called out.

"I don't trust anyone."

"God, you're an asshole. If you live through this, I never have to do another burpee again. Got it?" She sassed.

"And if I die?"

"Well, then I guess I still don't have to do another burpee ever again. It's a win win for me." She could have sworn she heard him laugh.

"Fine. Get me the hell out of here."

"Ok then. You're going to have to make a right and get around those two guards. There should be a panel on the wall next to the fire extinguisher."

After a few moments she heard the click of the panel being opened.

"Now what?" He sounded winded.

"There should be a series of switches and wires. It's super important that you follow these directions exactly." She heard a bang and another gunshot followed by a thud and silence. "Ward?! WARD!"

She looked at Coulson who also shared her look of concern.

"Consider the alien gun acquired. I pity the next Hydra agent that crosses me. Not after the afternoon I've had."

Willow blew out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding.

"I'm going to try and contact Agent May again. See how far out they are from extraction." Coulson gripped her shoulder. "You've got this." She nodded.

"We can discuss your gun later. Wires and switches…..focus! Turn the yellow knob clockwise one full rotation. Then there should be a blue lever, flip it down. You'll have to release each one of the buttons below one by one starting at the top and depress them. After all that, you should be able to cut the green wire at the bottom."

"You're sure about this?"

"Positive." More gunshots were fired and after another moment he had completed the manual security shut off.

"Heading back to the death trap door now."

"There's going to be a keypad on the left hand side of the door. I'm working on the override code." Willow watched as the keylogging program worked its magic. "Got it."

"Ready!"

"Two…seven….five…two…four…four….seven."

There was a stagnant pause and her face flushed from holding her breath.

"Agent Jamison, you officially don't have to do anymore burpees."

"That's only if you get out alive. You still need to save Fitz and Simmons on the other side of the building. North side, they're trapped by at least six Hydra agents."

"No worries….I have the alien gun remember?"

* * *

Willow had never been so relieved in all her life when she saw her team arrive back to the BUS. She went running down to greet them and almost went to hug Ward but awkwardly stopped short, not knowing how he would feel about it.

"You made it." She said softly.

"Only because of you." He pride for her was reflected in his smile. "That was quick thinking. I think even Fitz will be proud when I get a chance to tell him."

"Nah. It was nothing really. You just had to know where to look." She replied humbly.

"Maybe so, but you saved lives today. That definitely counts for something."

"Thank you." She blushed.

"Agent Ward, when you get a minute, the scientists need to look at the gun and make sure it's not carrying any alien viruses like the last time. I'm guessing not, since you're still standing, but you should also report to the lab as well." Director Coulson ordered. "Nice job out there today. And also, your trainee here stepped up and really proved herself. You both should be proud."

"You here that?" Ward slung an arm over her shoulders as Coulson walked away. "Welcome to the team."

"I still have a lot of proving to do. But umm…seriously, go get checked out." She laughed, poking him in the ribs as she shrugged out from under him. "I don't need any of your alien cooties."

"You know you want an alien virus all over you." He called out to her back as she headed up the stairs.

"In your dreams Wardy-poo."

"Did you really just use Hunter's idiotic nickname?"

"I don't know, did it get under your skin?" She yelled back with an evil grin, not even bothering to face him.

She heard him mumbling something profane under his breath.

"I guess my answer is yes." She winked over her shoulder before shutting the door behind her.


	10. Chapter 10

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 10

"What in the bloody hell happened in here?" Fitz coughed, fanning the smoke from his eyes.

"Willow is what happened." Jemma stated, holding the fire extinguisher.

"Oh c'mon now. It's not like that was _supposed_ to happen!" Willow defended. "That must be like some, highly flammable vegetable spray for the love of God."

"Are you sure it was vegetable spray and not propane? Because that's what it bloody smells like in here!"

"Oh hush up! It's not that bad. A crispy fried egg never killed anyone." Willow glared.

"Yes, but one cooked in propane just might…."

"That's it." She moved toward Fitz with the spatula and Jemma intervened.

"Woah woah woah! WHAT is going on in here?" A loud voice called over everyone effectively shutting them up.

"Oh this is just wonderful." Willow groaned, realizing it was Ward.

"Seriously, what is burning in here?" He questioned, looking back and forth between the three of them.

Fitz opened his mouth to answer and Willow pointed the spatula at him once again, daring him and he closed it. Ward reached over and yanked the spatula from her hand.

"I can't let you murder the scientist via kitchen utensil, even though you do get brownie points for being resourceful." His voice was completely serious, even though she could visibly see he was holding back a laugh.

"Don't worry about the kitchen utensils, just don't let her cook. She'll quite literally kill us all." Jemma teased, giggling.

"I'll remember this day Simmons. Oh, I _shall_ remember this day." Willow narrowed her eyes at the biochemist playfully.

"Us too, it shall be the day we tell the grandchildren we survived the Deadly Egg Fire of 2017." Fitz called over his shoulder with a smirk, as he and Jemma went to leave. Willow launched a dish towel at him, hitting him in the back of the head with precision earning a laugh from Jemma. "Ward! Get her out of the kitchen! Save us all!"

She paused a moment before turning to face Ward. She pursed her lips in embarrassment as she met his eyes that were presently staring at her full of mischief.

"Don't even say a word."

"I'm not." He pressed his lips together trying not to burst out laughing.

"I mean it. Not a word. SO or not, I will kick your ass." She threatened.

"You'd try. Now get over here." He grabbed a fresh pan murmuring quietly under his breath. "I didn't realize you needed culinary lessons too."

"What was that?!" She gasped moving to punch him in the shoulder. He let her.

"I'll give you that one for free." He looked down at her sideways. "Do you want to learn how to properly cook an egg or not?"

"It depends, are you going to tease me about it forever?" Her voice suddenly had a hint of seriousness, and he picked up on it immediately.

"I promise I won't tease you about it. Ever." He meant it. He could tell something was bothering her, and it wasn't just about a smoky kitchen.

"I just….it's seriously stupid. Never mind." She turned to walk away but he grabbed her arm, pulling her back to face him.

"Nothing about you is stupid." She stared hard at him, trying to determine his sincerity, finally deciding to speak.

"I grew up without a mom, so I didn't have anyone to teach me." She looked down at the floor. "I can kick asses, but I can't cook a freaking egg because I didn't have a mom."

Before she realized what was happening, and before he even knew what he was doing, he had pulled her into his arms and hugged her tight into his strong body. She didn't even notice that a few stray tears had escaped until she felt them on his t-shirt. "I'm not weak, but I miss her. So much sometimes."

"I know you're not, and I know you do." He whispered into her hair. "I didn't know her, but I know she'd be proud. And lucky for you, you have an SO that knows his way around a kitchen." He almost broke his own rule and opened up about his personal life—had almost told her that he hadn't really had a mom either, but that would be tearing down more barriers than he was willing.

She looked up at him and a small smile broke out across her teary face.

"No more tears. We're going to turn you into the best damned egg chef there ever was." He winked and she laughed which made him smile in return.

* * *

Later that night as Ward lay in his bunk trying to shut his mind off to sleep, his thoughts kept wandering back to his trainee. He hadn't meant to hug her. In fact, he had tried everything in his power the last few weeks not to cross any lines, but the look in her eyes when she spoke of her deceased mother was more than he could take and his body acted of its own accord. Once she was in his arms, he knew he was screwed—because he didn't really want to let go. He had successfully helped her fry an egg and the innocent way her face had lit up stirred something inside him. Willow was an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. She was lethal. And yet, she was impossibly elated over something as simple as cooking an egg. She had practically thrown herself back in his arms to hug him again, thanking him for helping and not judging and being the "best SO a girl could ask for". Of course he played it off with sarcasm and witty banter, but she was making him _feel_ things. He didn't like feeling things. _Or maybe he did_ , and that's what he hated most.

The way she wanted to dive right into the previous mission to save him had scared the shit out of him. However, he knew he couldn't delay the inevitable forever. She had proven her skills to Coulson, and the team that day, saving his life and ultimately the rest of the team's lives—and it was only a matter of time before Coulson sent her out on an op. As agents, they were trained at the academy not to have attachments to their teammates, but Ward had learned very quickly that working with Director Coulson, you didn't get to do that. His team was carefully crafted to feel more like a family-and Willow had fallen right into that family and was growing on everyone with each passing day.

He wondered how long it would be before John made contact again. He still didn't have any more answers about the GH-325 drug, and his questions for his SO had grown exponentially—even though he didn't expect to get any answers. He thought about going above John to Agent Hand, to clarify his mission details, but that would just infuriate John and make his life hell. He wanted to clear Coulson's team, but if he was being honest, he wasn't in a rush—because that would mean his mission was over and he'd have to leave the first real family he'd ever had. His loyalty was incredibly torn, and while he wanted to make his SO and childhood savior proud, his conscience was getting the better of him. Could he pick between Agent Garrett and Agent Coulson? He had been confident of the answer two years ago. Now, he wasn't so sure.

As he finally forced himself to sleep, the nightmare that greeted him that night was different. For months it had been Skye's bloody body that haunted him, but tonight, her face morphed into another, and that had him sitting straight up at 3am in a cold sweat, trembling with her name on his lips. _Willow_.


	11. Chapter 11

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 11

"She's been medically cleared, Agent Ward. She's proven she's an asset to the team, and her training with you has been like nothing I've ever seen. She's ready. Why are you holding back?" Coulson questioned.

"Sir…it's just that…."

"She's not Skye. History is not repeating itself, Ward. Would you rather I send her out with Agent May on her first mission?"

Ward's stomach lurched.

"Of course not, I'm her SO. I should be there." Because no matter how much he trusted Agent May, he needed to be there to make sure she stayed smart and safe. "And believe me I know she's not Skye."

"Good, then it's settled. Let everyone know we touch down in two hours." Coulson nodded reassuringly before exiting the room.

Ward blew out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding, and came to the conclusion that he really needed to get his shit together. Willow… _Agent_ Jamison was an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. She knew what she signed up for, but that truth hadn't stopped his new nightmares. The fear of another person getting hurt on his watch was more than he could stomach. Coulson may not have seen it as history repeating itself, but Ward did—and he hated it.

He was jarred from his thoughts as Willow poked her head in.

"Hey you! Are we training today or…" Her smile was bright and he wished he could forget the world and stare at it forever. How could she always be so happy?

"No…actually." He cleared his throat.

"But…I enjoy getting my ass kicked soooo much!" She frowned playfully.

"Well then, you won't mind that Coulson has recruited you for your first mission."

"He….wait….seriously?" Her face lit up.

"Yep. Full gear. We land in less than two hours. We'll meet in mission control in one hour to be briefed." He explained.

"You'll be there, right?" She bit her lip nervously. "I mean, I can handle it, I just-"

"I'd never let you face your first mission alone."

"Awesome. At least I know you won't allow me to screw up too bad." She laughed. "I'll meet you there." She headed to leave.

"Hey Willow."

"Yeah?" She asked turning on her heel.

"You can do this."

"I know. I've had a great mentor." Her cheeks flushed as she smiled and then she was gone. Ward was left alone again to his restless thoughts. She could do this- it was himself he needed to convince.

* * *

"Coms check." Agent May called out. Everyone sounded off as they checked their weapons and prepared to land. "Now remember, we get in, Fitz disarms the bomb, we get out. This is purely a terrorist neutralization operation."

Willow nodded in understanding. Her heart was thumping out of her chest, but she was ready. All her preparation had been for this very moment, and she was determined to succeed.

The group split up pairing off, Hunter and Bobbi, Agent May and Director Coulson, she and Ward were together and Mack would be following up the rear with Fitz once they had paved a clear path for the scientist.

It was chaotic from the moment they reached the interior of the steel building. Someone had sounded some obnoxiously blaring alarms once they determined the arrival of intruders and there were strobe lights flashing in the dimly lit hallways. Willow could hear voices up ahead shouting in German and she clutched her icer, preparing for anything.

"Three hostiles. Male. Armed." Ward called out to her. Suddenly there was gunfire and they dodged into a doorway. She could hear the sound of boots hitting the concrete floor. She counted the number of times they connected just like she'd been taught at the academy and she knew Ward was right about there being three. Ward held up a finger, signaling her to wait for his command. When the men were close enough he moved out, shooting two of them immediately. The third man raised his gun to shoot at him and Willow instinctively kicked it from his hand with perfect accuracy. He turned on her and she shot him with her icer in the chest. Her eyes locked on Wards and he nodded at her in reassurance.

"We've cleared the west wing, but we heard over an enemy radio that they are sending all units to the south side." Bobbi called out over the coms.

"They're going to try and detonate the bomb." Ward surmised. "Looks like we're up."

"We'll meet you there." Coulson said with a grunt. "Just handling….a few….friendly guests here."

Ward and Willow took off running toward the direction of the small reactor, but quickly realized they were outnumbered and outgunned ten to one.

"I'm bringing Fitz now. Simmons put the quinjet on autopilot-there were too many soldiers to stay on the ground." Mack radioed. "We've got to move fast."

"No go. There are at least twenty hostiles guarding the reactor." Ward stated, surveying the large room.

Willow whistled quietly getting Ward's attention. She pointed to another walkway on the upper level that would give them the higher ground, but she would have to cross over a thin row of scaffolding to reach a safe defensive position, which was debatable because it would literally be on top of the outside of the reactor.

"No way-that's suicide. We wait for back up." He warned.

"We both know there isn't time for back up." She protested. "They're going to detonate that bomb any minute and we'll all be dead anyway. I can make it."

His jaw clenched as he weighed her words. As much as he wanted to say no, he knew she was right, and she was the lighter of the two of them or he'd go himself.

"You make quick work of that scaffolding, you hear me? I'll cover you, but so help me God if you think you're dying today—"

Before he could even finish his sentence she was on the move. He watched as she expertly took the stairs two at a time, moving quiet and cat-like. So far she hadn't gained the attention of any soldiers below, but he watched them carefully—ready to shoot anyone that threatened her. She made it to the scaffolding that now looked more like a metal tight-rope act, but she had no fear as she took the first step. She wobbled for a moment gaining her balance and Ward's pulse raced with worry-it would only take one wrong step and she'd fall thirty feet to her death. Once she was steady on her feet, she moved methodically across the pole and the minute her feet landed on surface of the reactor housing she got into a defensive crouch. Once she was ready, they began picking them off with icer rounds one by one. It didn't take long for the soldiers to realize they were under attack and they began firing back—only their rounds weren't meant to stun, but kill. Ward, being on the ground was the first target they came for and he made quick work of two of them, using one as a human shield before shooting the other. Two more approached him but quickly fell to the ground thanks to Willow. At that point there were only six left and the other agents had started arriving. Agent May put down the two more of them with expert grace and ease, while Bobbi and Hunter each took one. The last two men took off running.

"I've got them." Ward called out taking off at full sprint. About halfway down the narrow hallway he caught up to the fleeing enemies. Using the butt of his gun, he slammed it hard into the back of the first man's head and he dropped with a thud and Ward put and icer round in his chest. The second man attacked him from behind, his arm buried deep under Ward's chin choking him. Ward used his strength to flip him forward over his shoulders, his grip loosening as he hit the ground. He moved to grab a gun from his waist but Ward kicked him in the face as hard as he could, knocking him out. Not taking any chances that he might get away to alert more enemy forces, he iced him for good measure.

He made his way back to the team to help defend Fitz while he disarmed the bomb, but in his short absence, there had been a new wave of hostiles and the team was once again greatly outnumbered.

Taking a second gun out of his holster, now firing with one in each hand with expert precision he called out to Fitz. "Talk to me Fitz."

"Two minutes. That's all I need." Fitz replied as he intently stared at the gigantic bundle of wires in front of him.

"Make it one."

A bullet ricocheted inches from Fitz's head, but Willow was on it. She had climbed back down to the lower level and landed a head kick to a man's jaw, rendering him immediately unconscious. Ward made a mental note to avoid her kicks in training—they were deadly. She perched herself directly in front of Fitz, holding off anyone that dared to get near the engineer. The team had effectively taken the room back when Fitz finally called out that he was finished.

"Alright, time to pack it up ladies and gents. Let's get out of here." Coulson called out.

They began making their way to the extraction point where Agent Simmons was waiting with the quinjet. As they made it out of the building, there was an ambush of enemy soldiers from both sides of them and the team opted to make a run for it. Everything that happened next was a blur as there was a loud scream for Fitz to get down. Ward watched everything in seemingly slow motion as Willow plowed into Fitz knocking him out of the way, but her body fell impossibly hard to the ground and she wasn't moving to get up.

"Willow!" Fitz yelled out, scrambling to her. "Help! Someone help!"

"No." Ward stated in shock. "NO!" He screamed out hoarsely, his body was moving, running as fast as his legs would carry him. "No no no!" He kept repeating over and over as if that would somehow change the outcome.

"She…she saved me! They shot her!" Fitz shouted over the gunfire and yelling.

"Get to the jet! NOW!" Ward ordered, scooping up Willow's bloody lifeless body off the pavement. "C'mon Willow. Stay with me!"

He ran faster than he had ever run in his life.

"SIMMONS!" He yelled. "Simmons please!" His voice was pleading, desperate and he didn't even care. He would beg if he had to. Agent Simmons and Coulson were waiting to help get her laid flat onto the emergency stretcher as the hatch to the quinjet closed behind them and Agent May took over piloting, getting them out of enemy territory.

All Ward could see was blood. It was all over her face and torso and the panic that overtook him was more than the agent could handle.

It took Hunter and Mack both to remove him from the area so that Simmons could have space to work. By the time they'd gotten back to the BUS they had threatened to sedate him if he couldn't calm down. Once they were convinced he wasn't going to completely lose his shit, they allowed him to sit outside the med pod with his back to the wall, waiting for any news. Fitz sat with him in silence, clearly just as shaken that Willow had saved his life and was now fighting for hers.

After what felt like hours, Jemma finally approached them giving them both a look of pity. Ward suddenly felt like he could throw up.

"She's going to be just fine. It's all going to be alright." She smiled softly at the pair.

"She…she's okay?" He questioned hoarsely, not sure he could trust his own ears.

"How bad is it?" Fitz asked, both men standing.

"She took a pretty nasty bullet to the arm, and has a slight concussion-but she's going to heal up nicely. Agent Ward, you can go and see her if you'd like. I need to take her blood samples to the lab to make sure all is well there, but she's awake for now."

That was all Ward needed to hear to move to the doorway. She was laying on the bed, her arm bandaged and several stitches across her temple. She was pale and her eyes were closed, but they slowly opened when he entered.

"You look like someone kicked your puppy."

Ward winced at the reference, triggering a flashback to his dog named Buddy that John had made him shoot when he was a teenager, but he dismissed it quickly.

"Worse actually. Someone shot my trainee." He grimaced, sitting down in the chair beside her bed, his elbows resting on his knees.

"Your trainee sucks."

"No way. Well….sometimes-mostly when she back talks me. Otherwise she's pretty awesome." He winked, earning a sleepy smile from her.

"Even though she screwed up her first mission?" Willow murmured.

"You saved Fitz's life. He'd be dead right now if it weren't for you." Ward swallowed hard thinking about what kind of grief it would cause to lose anyone on the team.

"Speaking of him, you can let him know he makes the absolute worst landing pad. The least he could have done was let me rest my head on his chest like a decent human instead of letting my skull smash into the concrete."

"I'll be sure to tell him." Ward chuckled.

"No wait, on second thought don't tell him. I'll save some concussion jokes for the next time he makes fun of my cooking." Her eyelids drooped exhaustedly.

"Are you in any pain?" Ward asked softly, eyeing her bandaged arm, but thankful she was still in joking spirits.

"I'm good. Simmons gave me the good drugs after she stitched up my bullet wound. I think it's gonna leave a pretty cool scar."

"You scared the shit out of me today. I thought—"

"You thought I was Skye all over again. I know." Her eyes were closed now and her voice had a curious sadness to it. He hadn't mentioned Skye to her, maybe the others had, he wondered.

"I just can't go through that again." His voice was barely a whisper.

"You know I'm not her, right?"

"Of course."

"You sure about that?" She murmured, and his heart clenched. _What was she trying to ask him?_

"I'm positive." He breathed out, but by that point she was already fast asleep.

Reaching down he took her hand in his and rubbed his thumb over her knuckles gently, whispering to himself. "Because what I thought I felt for her doesn't even hold a candle to you…..and I cannot survive that."


	12. Chapter 12

**DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine.**

Chapter 12

The next four weeks Willow had found herself once again on medical restriction to her dismay, and unable to go on any combat missions. She had picked up a project of hunting down potential Hydra agents by scanning for unusual activity on the web and watching for any leads.

"Any luck today?" Coulson asked, sipping his morning coffee from his favorite Captain America mug.

"You'd actually be surprised how many mistakes they seem to be making via social media. Can you believe I actually found multiple hail hydra hashtags?" She asked exasperated, turning the laptop to face him.

"I remember when that was a pound sign." Coulson smirked.

"Yeah well, apparently it's a new way of communication for our favorite enemy." She explained. "I've worked out some of their secret coding but it's honestly probably beyond my skills. Maybe if I'd had a few more years at the academy, but it could take me awhile."

"I can outsource that to Skye. She's the best in the business." Coulson stated. "She mentioned she was going a little stir crazy anyway, maybe it'll give her something to do."

"Skye as in former Agent Skye, sir?" Willow asked.

He nodded. "Even though she doesn't want to be an active agent anymore, she's agreed to work as a consultant for S.H.I.E.L.D."

"Well then I'm sure she'll be able to figure out what I'm missing. I'll be happy to get the data you need for her at once." Willow swallowed back any emotion that threatened to surface. Even though she realistically knew no one expected her to be anyone but herself, it did seem as though every now and again they had tried to replace their missing teammate with her, and she wasn't sure she was living up to the expectation. After all, it was pretty hard to live up to Quake, the expert hacktivist and previous "rookie" trained by her SO—to which Jemma had accidentally spilled the beans that Skye and Ward once had a "thing". That thought made Willow's heart drop to her stomach and she wasn't quite sure why.

"I did however come across a man by the name of Pablo Grimaldi, who quickly made his way to the top of my list of potentials. I was able to track his bank accounts and it turns out he's been supplying a known Hydra base with weapons, particularly alien tech scavenged from the New York Attack, and more recently with toxic chemicals."

"That sounds like a bad headline waiting to happen. Get me all the intelligence you can on him as well and I'll have Agent May take a look at it. The name sounds particularly familiar to me but I can't place it. Maybe she'll remember."

"Absolutely, sir."

He moved to leave but stopped short of the door.

"I just want you to know we're all glad you're part of this team. You've jumped onboard a tightknit group of quite frankly, stubborn and sometimes insufferable humans, and you've done really well. I'm proud to have you here with us." He smiled.

"Thank you, sir. I think I really needed to hear that today. And for the record, you're not all insufferable….. _all_ of the time." She winked and he chuckled as he left.

For the rest of the day she sank into her work, determined to have all the best information she could get—especially if she had to hand it over to Skye. She was already feeling rather inadequate, so the last thing she needed was for her predecessor to have any reason to look down on her. When she glanced out the window she realized it had turned dark outside, so she slid her laptop under her arm and made her way back toward her bunk. She had just passed Ward's quarters when the door suddenly opened, startling her. He was dressed in full gear.

"Oh! Hey! Are you….heading out?" She asked in momentary shock, noting the dark circles under his eyes.

"Yeah, actually. I won't be back for a few days." His voice was gruff, like he had just woken up.

"Days? Is it a new mission?" She asked surprised. She hadn't heard anyone mention anything.

"It's classified." He glanced down at the floor.

"Oh." She replied stupidly, chewing on the inside of her cheek, unsure of what to say. Ever since she'd been shot, he'd been acting different toward her, distancing himself. It was even worse than when she first arrived on the BUS and she hated it. If she was being honest with herself, she missed his company. "Well um…good luck. And um….do you need me to do anything?"

"Can you try not to get shot while I'm gone?" He glanced up at her with a half- smile. It was the best she'd seen in weeks.

"No promises there. We all know I'm like the poster child for medical restriction." She bit her lip. The awkward tension was killing her.

"I'm serious." He looked up at her fully now, and there was a brief sadness in his eyes. She wanted so badly to hug him, but she kept her arms planted firmly at her sides.

"Me too. I guess you'll just have to make sure you make it back quickly then."

"I'll do my best." He cleared his throat, shutting his door behind him. He moved to walk past her and without even thinking she brushed her hand against his, their fingertips barely touching, but it was enough to make him turn back to look at her.

"Please be careful." Was all she could manage to whisper, an unsettling feeling burning in the pit of her stomach. He nodded and then he was gone.

* * *

She struggled to fall asleep that night, and when she did her nightmares rained down on her with full force. They had been happening more frequently over the last couple of weeks, but this one was new and left her waking with a scream upon her lips.

 _It was so dark. She could see out of the tiny slit in the closet she was crouched in, her knees pulled to her chest. She could hear him and his threatening voice. She hated that voice-it was the voice of a monster. There was a thunderous boom and a scream….and then another, followed by absolute silence. She bit her closed fist in her teeth to keep from crying out, her entire body trembling uncontrollably._

 _"_ _Find it!" He shouted. "Find it ….find it….find it." Those two words were forever embedded in her memory. The footsteps moved toward the closet and her heart raced with terror. They were so close. They would find her._

 _"_ _I know where it is."_

 _Liam. No. No no no. Liam don't leave me too. Please don't leave me I'm scared. She wanted to call out to him but she couldn't. She was paralyzed with fear._

 _"_ _Take the boy."_

 _Nooooooo. Please nooooooo._

 _With courage a little girl shouldn't have to have, she burst out of the closet to save her brother. She wouldn't let them take him from her again. She wouldn't let him be the sacrifice. But when she grabbed his hand to pull him back, it wasn't the face of her brother standing before her. It was Ward._


	13. Chapter 13

_DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine._

 _Also, for all the SkyeWard shippers, I know it's hard to read him with another character-but trust me. Skye will make an appearance and everything will be explained. Everyone will get their HEA, because I quite simply-cannot write a story without one ;)_

Chapter 13

He'd been avoiding her. He knew it. She knew it. After she'd been shot, he resolved himself to not cross anymore boundaries and to only be her SO and to try and figure out how to make sure John was pleased and none of the people he cared about got hurt-even if the higher ups in S.H.I.E.L.D. believed them to be secretly working for Hydra. Even if he could convince himself that Coulson was a Hydra mole, he just couldn't make himself go along with the idea that Fitz and Simmons, with their dedication to betterment of the world, were Hydra sleepers. Bobbie, Hunter and Mack? Anything was possible with them he supposed, even though it seemed highly unlikely. Agent May was as loyal to Coulson as they came, so as long as he knew what side Coulson was on, he could count on the Cavalry being right there beside him.

And then there was Willow. There was no possible way she could be working for Hydra. He knew that deep down in his bones. After all, Coulson could have just as easily picked that Chamberlin prick, so unless they were both Hydra, he had a 50/50 shot at the team agreeing to the right one. There was also fact that Willow's file had alluded to a Hydra agent being responsible for the deaths of her family. It wouldn't make any sense for her to join forces with the enemy.

He drew in a calming breath as he made his way into John's underground office. After working with Coulson for so long, he had grown to hate these encounters with his SO. He didn't understand how the S.H.I.E.L.D. teams could be so different in their treatment of agents—but he knew John worked hard for his position within the agency, and had stuck his neck out to get Ward into the academy after his tainted childhood. That was why Ward continued following orders. He was good at that. It kept him grounded. Even though nothing but pain, mental _and_ physical, came from John Garrett—pain was all Ward knew. He was disgusted to admit that it was the only form of comfort he understood. The steel doors opened and he was immediately patted down and all weapons were removed. The two usual guards directed him into the first room where he would be expected to pass a state of the art lie detector test. His particular skills in espionage were a bonus because he had learned to beat the test long ago, and John hadn't figured that out….yet. Once seated in the chair that measured oxygen saturation, brainwaves, pupil dilation, body response and who knew what else, they began with the typical questions.

"State your full name and date of birth."

"Grant Douglas Ward. January 7th, 1983. Do you ever change that suit? It seems like you always have on the same one every time I'm here. That can't be a hit with the ladies." He antagonized.

He felt a zap of electricity jolt through his body making the hairs on his body stand at attention.

"Well….that's new." He glared, rolling his shoulders and neck in preparation for what might come. The agent smirked sadistically, and Ward made a mental note to end him if he ever got the chance.

"Is the day of the week Monday?"

"No."

"Is the year 2017?

"Yes."

"Are you loyal to John Garrett?"

"Yes."

"What is your current mission?"

"To infiltrate Director Coulson's team, gain intelligence on said team, and find the location of the GH-325 drug."

"Very good."

Just as Ward thought he was finished, he was struck with a blow that he wasn't prepared for.

"Did you know that the GH-325 drug was used on Agent Skye?"

Ward had to focus on staying completely calm, and keep his answers strategic. There were always loopholes.

"I was not made aware that the drug was being used on Skye."

It was true, he didn't know they used it at first, but he told them he wanted them to do anything they could to keep her alive. It was only after the fact that he'd found out about the use of the drug, but the fact that John now knew about it was alarming.

"Did you witness the drug being given?"

"I did not."

"Do you know where it came from?"

This one was a bit tougher. He knew that Coulson got the drug from Nick Fury, but if he let on that he knew- they'd know he'd been previously lying.

"Where what came from? The drug? I've been led to believe it came from some alien Kree lineage."

"Try again. Did you know who gave the drug to Agent Coulson?"

He took slow, calculated breaths to slow his heart rate and calm his body down. He couldn't afford to fail this test.

"I do not know the person that gave the drug to Coulson. As I said, I was not aware of the administration of the GH-325."

Technically, he had never met former Director Fury in person, so that wasn't a lie.

Just as the agent was about to ask another question, the door burst open and none other than John himself stood before him with a shit eating grin on his face.

"Welcome home son!" He ruffled Ward's hair. "This is no way to treat my best agent. Get him out of this thing!"

Ward plastered on a fake smile, knowing damn good and well it was John that had ordered those questions to be asked. This wasn't going to end well.

Instead of being led to John's office like he normally would, he was taken down to another sublevel that appeared to be a giant laboratory. John then hopped up on top of a countertop taking a seat, looking more relaxed than ever—which only made Ward's senses heighten.

"You look terrified kid. Tell me Coulson hasn't turned you into a sissy."

"Terrified? When have you known me to be terrified?"

John quirked an eyebrow to which Ward scoffed.

"So what's all this? Have you turned into a mad scientist in my absence?" Ward motioned around the room.

"Oh no. Not me. I pay other people to do that." He winked. About that time, two figures appeared around the corner and Ward had to reach into depths he'd never ventured to keep himself planted firmly and to stay complacent. John watched him closely, as if he was waiting for a reaction. "You remember Ian Quinn, right?"

"How could I forget?" Ward's tone was clipped.

"You don't still hold a grudge against me, do you?" Ian grinned.

"For shooting Skye in the stomach twice and leaving her for dead? Not at all." He wanted to kill him right then. He wanted to put a bullet in his skull.

"You'll have to excuse Agent Ward. He has a bit of a soft spot for the girl. I think he's pretty upset they never got to hit it off in the sack, if ya know what I mean." John waggled his eyebrows and Ward didn't even bother hiding his disgust.

"Can we get on with this?" Ward scowled.

"Fine, fine. Always soooo serious." John rolled his eyes. "This is Raina. She has been helping me with Project Deathlok."

"Project Deathlok?"

"Let's face it kid. I haven't been completely and totally honest with you. Yes, I want you to acquire the GH-325 for S.H.I.E.L.D., but I've also been promised a dose of the drug by the VIP's because it's not a secret-I'm dying. I'm dying because of my service to this agency."

That felt like a punch to the gut. Yes, John was an awful person sometimes—but he was his savior. He didn't think he could stand by and do nothing.

"Why didn't you tell me? You know I'd do anything to help you."

"That's why I'm telling you now. Because I need to do something you're not going to like. But I know you won't let me die, not after all I've done for you."

Ward swallowed hard.

"Raina and Ian are helping me to create the very first super soldier for S.H.I.E.L.D., in preparation for the event that Coulson might have already started his own army. That first soldier is going to be me. They've already started placement of bio-mechanical parts to keep me alive until we get our hands on GH-325."

"So what is it you plan on doing? Bio-mechanical parts?" Ward's thoughts were racing.

"All in good time, son." John grinned. "You see, there's a possibility that Skye's blood contains enough of the serum that we can recreate it." Ward's stomach lurched.

"I would have suggested Coulson's blood instead but I was able to get ahold of his sample reports and it would seem that since he was literally brain dead during the T.A.H.I.T.I project, the GH-325 reacted differently with him than Skye. Whatever else they did to him, nulled out any healing properties his blood might have." Raina piped up with her well-practiced, soothing voice.

"Wait, what?" Ward questioned. "They actually used GH-325 on Skye?" He knew better than to let on that he was already aware of that fact.

"We received intel that Coulson got the drug from Fury and used it on Skye to save her life. You know nothing about that?" John asked curiously.

"I was told that she was healed by the inhumans." He lied smoothly. "But about that…you _swore_ to me that you had no involvement in her shooting—and now I find you here working with the trigger happy asshole?" Ward snapped, unable to reign in the anger any longer.

"Look kid, I know you're still pissed about that, but the agency agreed we had to take the risk to see how far up the chain Hydra had infiltrated. We got our answer that it goes all the way to Fury, and your girlfriend got to live. Win win." John shrugged nonchalantly. Like the fact he'd almost killed Skye was no big deal. It made Ward's blood boil.

"This doesn't sound like the S.H.I.E.L.D. way. It _sounds_ like Hydra." Ward's voice was deadly. He knew he was being risky, outnumbered and without a weapon, but he didn't care. "And for the last time, she's _not_ my girlfriend."

"Then you won't mind my borrowing her sometime in the near future so we can run some tests on that precious blood of hers." John winked, unfazed.

"She's gone off grid." Ward replied through gritted teeth.

"Something tells me she'll make an appearance before too long. And when she does, you're gonna have to make a choice son. You're either loyal to her, or to me. And since I'm not feeling very confident in your decision making skills right now, I'm gonna send you down for a quick refresher before you go back to Coulson. I need my pitbull back, not some lazy lap dog." John was now inches from Ward's face as they menacingly stared each other down.

Ward's fists clenched and unclenched.

"And if I refuse?"

"Then I'll start asking why you never mentioned your cute new trainee. Willow, is it?"

Ward's blood ran cold.

"Ahhh….now that's what I'm talkin' about." John laughed. "Take him away. Oh and Agent Ward…..if you ever accuse me of being Hydra again, I'll kill you."

As he was dragged away to the compliance chamber, he swore he overheard Ian ask John if he thought Ward suspected something.

Ward had been sent to re-compliance before, but something about it this time felt all wrong. He could take a beating. He could withstand the brainwashing techniques—but for the first time in almost two decades, he knew where his loyalties did not lie. He didn't know how he was going to fix this giant mess, but he had to do something.

All he could think about as the death blows struck his rib cage was Willow. His nightmare had come true. John knew about her, and he wasn't sure he could keep her safe—and that took his fears and anger to a whole new level. That thought alone kept him from giving his tormenters any satisfaction. He didn't make a single sound as they rained pain down upon him.

He survived the beatings—they were always careful not to leave bruises where they would show. He survived the brutally cold ice water. He made it through the insomnia torture. Hell, he was used to insomnia—and on the third day when they let him out of his tiny cell, in a lifeless tone he uttered the only words he knew they wanted to hear.

"I'm happy to comply."


	14. Chapter 14

_DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine._

Chapter 14

Willow had been on edge the entire three days Ward had been gone and hardly able to focus on anything. Jemma had even accused her of having feelings for him, which she immediately rebuked. Sure, she cared about her SO. But feelings? That meant something a whole lot more and she wasn't ready to entertain those thoughts—especially because she knew he'd never want that. Not with her.

"So no one knows anything about Ward's classified missions? Not even Coulson?"

"Classified means classified. It's the compartmentalization of information. Agent Garrett is a level 8 operative with missions equally as important as ours. It's not uncommon for an SO to call upon his trained agents for missions that require certain skills and Ward in particular, has a lot of skills in varying areas. He's an asset." Agent May explained.

"I don't know. Something just feels really wrong about it to me. I can't explain it." Willow paced the gym floor.

"Just a word of advice, let it go. If Coulson's not worried, then you shouldn't be either." May stated before heading off toward the shower. "Ward can handle himself. You should know that."

Willow blew out a breath of frustration. They hadn't seen the look in his eyes before he left. They hadn't felt the tension that surrounded him. It had been awful.

"Look, what May is trying to say is, don't stress. Ward goes on these classified missions like every three months or so. It's all good." Bobbi quipped, yanking out her ear buds. "I tell ya what, how about showing me those baton skills to take your mind off of it? I promise I won't breathe a word to Simmons." She grinned.

"That might just be the best offer I've had in weeks."

* * *

That evening she'd learned that Ward had made it back to the BUS, but he was exhausted and requested not to be bothered that night. She still couldn't shake the nervous feeling in the pit of her stomach that something was seriously wrong. She didn't have much choice though, so she retired to her bunk, determined to get some answers about his recent behavior in the morning.

Like clockwork, around 2:30am she'd woken up from a horrific dream and after lying in bed staring at the ceiling for 30 minutes, she'd decided to get up and go for a jog on the treadmill. She'd no more than made it out of her room when she heard his screams coming from his quarters. She didn't hesitate to go to him, not even bothering to knock as she made her way inside his dark living space. Even though it was nearly pitch black, she could still make out his body writhing in agony, so she moved quickly, dropping to her knees beside his bed and reached out to touch his arm.

"Ward. Shhhh. It's me….you're safe. You need to wake up."

His body calmed for a split second and then before she even registered what was happening, she was thrown violently on her back, pinned beneath his weight on the floor and his grip was on her throat. His eyes were crazed and she knew she should be terrified—he was a highly lethal agent with a death grip on her wind pipe—but she couldn't help it. She knew this wasn't him. Whatever was haunting him in his sleep was the culprit for her now near unconsciousness. She gasped and choked, trying to release his grip. She could have fought harder, but she didn't want to risk injuring him in his altered state.

"I won't let you hurt her! I'll kill you!" He shouted, maniacally. "Do you hear me?! I'll KILL you!"

"W-W—Ward…" She barely got out, her face turning purple. She reached for his hand and slowly, gently rubbed her thumb over his knuckles. For a moment, his grip loosened and she cried out his name. She could visibly see his mental fog clearing and then the sheer terror and panic of what he'd done washed over him as he leaned back on his knees, letting her go.

"No. No no no. What did I do to you?" He was nearly hyperventilating now and his body was shaking like a leaf.

"Ssshhh…. Ward…." Willow croaked out. "It's okay. I'm okay."

He practically jumped off of her, scrambling back onto the bunk to sit as far away from her as he could. Her heart ached at the sight before her. She stood slowly, ignoring the burning in her throat and moved to him. He flinched as she got closer, but she didn't let that deter her. She climbed in his bunk behind him and propped herself up so she could pull his back against her chest.

"No…." He protested.

"Shhhh…..c'mere. Please. Just do this for me right now." She pulled against him and she felt him wince like he was in pain. She reached for the hem of his t-shirt and caught a glimpse of some really nasty bruises causing her to gasp in shock before he quickly yanked the shirt back down. "Ward what happened-"

"Don't."

"Please just talk to me." She begged softly. Someone had hurt him really bad, and she wanted to hurt someone really bad, in return.

"I can't talk about it. Please don't ask me. It's safer if I don't talk about it." He pleaded.

"Okay." She whispered, once again pulling him, gently this time back against her.

"You shouldn't be here. I just….I just tried to kill you. " His voice was hoarse.

About that time Coulson and May arrived at the doorway after most likely hearing the commotion and May flipped on the small lamp, giving a look like she was ready to pounce. Willow held up a hand in silent plea for them to just walk away.

"Are you alright?" Coulson asked in concern at the sight before him.

"We're fine." Willow nodded. Ward didn't even have the strength to protest. "I promise."

Coulson gave her a fatherly look that said if she needed anything they'd be right there, before he grabbed May's arm and drug her reluctantly away.

"I just wanted to keep you safe. Keep you safe…." He murmured. "And I'm the one that tried to hurt you."

"Ward…" She asked. "Safe from who? I'm okay. You didn't hurt me-"

"YES I DID!" He snapped, but she draped her arms on either side of his neck, laying her palms flat against his chest, willing his heart beat to calm. "Please just go. Just….get as far away from me as you can."

"I'm not leaving you. You are _not_ pushing me away, got that?!" She pulled the blanket up over him covering them both as she gently ran her fingers through his soft, dark hair.

"What if….what if all this time I just wanted to be the good guy, and I've been the bad guy all along?" His voice was barely a whisper now. Her hand rested against his cheek and he leaned into it instinctively.

"You are a good man. I believe that. I know it in my heart to be true." She replied softly.

"I hope you're right Willow." He laughed, clearly not believing it himself.

"I am."

"How can you even want to be here right now?" His tone was of disgust for himself.

"Because this is my safe place." She swallowed, not sure she was ready to admit more than that.

"Even though I almost killed you?" He squeezed her leg beneath his fingertips to drive the point home.

"Please. My SO trained me to be way tougher than that." She smirked, earning the tiniest hint of a smile from him. "And yes. I've never felt safer in my entire life."

"This cruel world doesn't deserve you."

"If you won't tell me what happened, will you tell me something about you that other people don't know?"

"You don't want to know the real me."

"Try me." She pleaded softly, stroking his cheek with her thumb.

"You'll just look at me differently." He replied, sadness in his voice.

"Why don't you let me be the judge of that?" There was a long, stagnant pause before he finally spoke—and she'd be lying if she didn't admit she was surprised. She didn't think he would talk at all.

"I grew up in Massachusetts with two brothers, one younger and one older, and a sister. My older brother….he…." He gritted his teeth.

"It's okay. You can trust me."

"I don't….know how to trust anyone." He swallowed hard, thankful he didn't have to look her in the eyes.

"You don't have to trust me now. People have to earn trust…..and I will. I promise." She rested her cheek atop his head.

His chest tightened. He wanted to trust her. He wanted to believe her. Hell, maybe he even owed her after he'd just tried to strangle her.

"My um….my older brother was….abusive. He…instead of just beating up on me and my kid brother, he would force me to do it, otherwise my youngest brother would have to take my torture too. I didn't know what to do. I thought, I thought that if I did it, maybe I could make it hurt less. That he wouldn't have to suffer so much."

Willow reached down for his hand, tangling her fingers in his for reassurance and the feel of her hand in his caused something to stir inside him. The simple act made him want to tell her everything, but he'd spare her the gory details. She was too good and pure for that.

"One day he threw my baby brother in the well out back behind our home and wouldn't let me help him. I had to wait almost two hours to sneak back out to rescue him, and even then he barely survived. My older brother told my parents that I did it."

"They didn't believe him though, right?" She questioned, squeezing his hand.

"My parents were even worse than him. My mom…she locked me in the closet for five days until my dad decided to ship me off to military school. I lasted there for about a month until my baby brother snuck a letter to me telling me what they were doing to him. I ran away from military school, stole a car and drove over a thousand miles to get back home to….."

"It's okay. Take your time. I'm not going anywhere."

"I went back home to burn down the fucking house. I wanted to take everything from them like they had me and my brother. But what I didn't know was that Christian, my oldest brother was still inside the house. He survived, but my parents pressed charges against me at age 15 and had me locked up in a juvenile detention center."

"Your parents deserve to rot." Her voice rang out enraged, surprising him. "Seriously. They are worthless pieces of shit for doing that to you and your brother. Do you have contact with any of them?"

He shook his head no. "Christian is a senator now though. Can you believe that?"

"Wow. Just…fucking wow. That makes me so fucking furious for you. What happened after that? How did you become the brilliant specialist that you are today?"

"My SO. He recruited me out of juvenile hall and got me into …..training. I was put through all the survival trials he could think of before convincing them to let me join the S.H.I.E.L.D. academy. "

"Trials? Is that standard protocol? I've never heard of anyone having to do that. It's just a series of written exams and some physical tests. And of course you have to get through all the psychologists." Willow questioned.

"I think it was just because I was so young with a bad record. He needed me to prove myself, so I did." Ward answered, more questions seeping into the back of his mind. He'd always wondered why John had insisted on sending him out into the wilderness alone for two years with nothing but the clothes on his back and the will to survive. He could tell Willow wasn't any more convinced than he was, truthfully. "Either way, he saved me from hard prison time—which my family was pushing for. They wanted me locked away for life—but he gave me a purpose."

"It sounds like he means a lot to you."

"I owe him a lot."

"That's not really the same thing, is it?" She pushed, getting a suspicious feeling about his SO that she couldn't quite put a finger on.

"Where I come from, a debt is paid-no matter how long it takes." Ward whispered.

"Not all good deeds are debts meant to be repaid." She said quietly, deep in thought.

"I've probably said enough. What about you? What's something no one knows about you?" He asked, changing the subject off of himself.

"You've read my file."

"That doesn't really tell me anything, you know that as well as I do."

"My parents were doctors that worked for S.H.I.E.L.D. They were killed by a hydra agent when I was seven, while I hid in a closet they put me in to protect me. I was told not to come out for anything. That I was precious and had to be careful. I had to watch as they put a bullet in both my parent's skulls, and then not make a sound as my older brother sacrificed himself for me so they wouldn't find me. They took him and I never saw him again."

She wiped away a stray tear that had escaped down her cheek and Ward quickly grabbed her hand again, giving her the same reassuring squeeze she'd given him.

"I was taken in by S.H.I.E.L.D., they changed my last name and then moved me to a safe house with a man and woman sworn to protect me. Protect me from what, I still don't know. Nobody ever gave me answers. When I turned eighteen, I joined the academy and two weeks after I joined, the safe house I lived in was blown to bits. I have no idea what happened to Sarah and Jordan. They never found their bodies, so I keep holding on to hope that they made it out, or weren't home. They were the closest thing to family that I had—and they treated me well. Even if they did have secrets."

"I'm so sorry Willow." He said, wishing he could take her pain. He could feel it radiating off of her in waves.

"Don't be. I joined S.H.I.E.L.D. to get answers and to deliver justice to Hydra. And one day I'll be able to do just that."

It was quiet for a long time.

"How bad did I hurt you?" He asked.

"Not at all."

"We're going to have to work on your lying skills."

"Well then we should get some rest so you can get back to training me tomorrow. I've been bored without you."

She could feel him relax into her and she stayed until the sun rose, letting him sleep peacefully against her. At 7am she quietly slipped out of his room and went to take a hot shower, desperately needing to process the previous evening and to get something from Simmons for the awful pain in her neck. She'd never let him know that though. He'd let her in, and she wasn't going to let him shut the door in her face ever again.


	15. Chapter 15

_DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine._

Chapter 15

"What on earth happened to you?!" Simmons gasped as Willow shrugged off her jacket, revealing the fingerlike bruises on her throat.

"It's a really complicated story."

"I've got time." Simmons motherly narrowed her eyes on her.

"Let's just say….someone had a nightmare, I tried to wake them and it didn't go so well." Willow stated, giving her the shortest version possible. She sucked in a breath as Simmons pushed against her eliciting pain she'd been fighting all morning. She hadn't wanted Ward to see how bad it actually hurt—he was already torturing himself enough.

"You're downright lucky he didn't break your neck."

"I didn't say it was a he."

Simmons rolled her eyes. "It doesn't take two PhD's to know that it was Ward. I'm pretty sure everyone on this BUS knows he has PTSD, even if we don't have the details. But none of us are stupid enough to try and wake a killing machine out of a dead sleep." She stated, pointedly.

"Yeah well, it doesn't take two PhD's to pull your head out of the sand and help someone either. Maybe that's the problem." Willow smacked at her hand when she tried to push again.

"You're probably right. Maybe we're horrible teammates." Jemma pondered, a guilty look creeping across her face. "You're a terrible patient though, do you know that?"

"So you've said." Willow stuck her tongue out at the biochemist.

"It's not my fault you spend so much time in my med bay. I think you just love me so much you can't stay away." She teased. "You're going to need to ice this several times a day for the next week or so. Also some stretches each morning and night should help. The swelling should start going down some after I give you a steroid injection. Do you need anything for pain?"

"I'm good. I'll be fine." She winced as Simmons poked the giant needle in her neck without warning.

"You know, Skye tried to help Ward too. She—"

"I really appreciate that. But I'm not really trying to be some Skye replacement. I wish people could get that through their heads." Willow snapped. It was totally unlike her and she felt terrible immediately after seeing the look of shock on her teammates face. "I'm sorry. I just…..sometimes it feels like I was brought here to take her place and it's really hard trying to live up to that. And the last thing I want is for Ward to think I'm her."

"Oh Willow. I feel horrid thinking that we've put that kind of pressure on you. We love Skye. We loved having her here. But we also love having you here too. Exactly the way you are-you don't have to be someone you're not, not with us. And believe me, I think Ward may have seen you as her replacement in the beginning, but that isn't the way he sees you now. I see the way he looks at you."

"You keep saying that but….I'm not sure. I'm not sure of anything anymore."

"Love is a painfully beautiful thing."

"This….is _not_ love." Willow squeaked out, her eyebrows raising.

"Sure it's not." Jemma teased, placing an ice pack against her throat.

"If he was going to love anyone, I'm quite sure it would be her. Who wouldn't love the gorgeously famous Quake?"

"If I didn't know better, I'd say you were jealous."

"What?! No!"

"Just because they have history, doesn't mean that's what he still wants. Besides, Skye is happily engaged."

"That makes me feel so much better. I've always wanted to be a rebound."

"What exactly _do_ you want, Willow?" Jemma asked softly.

"I don't…..I don't know. I just want—I guess I just want to be there for him is all. I know what it's like to feel isolated. He has a good heart, and he doesn't deserve to be alone." Willow suddenly found her shoelaces very interesting, not willing to look the biochemist in the eyes.

"I think you're already doing a good job of that." Jemma smiled. "You're good for him. Even Coulson seems to think so."

"What the hell?! Does everyone just sit around and chit-chat about us?! Good grief!" Willow stood, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

"For heavens sakes….no." Jemma laughed. "Well…..maybe when we're all super bored in the lab and-"

Willow's jaw hit the floor, throwing up a hand to silence her.

"Okay hush. Just…..forget I asked!" She shrugged her jacket back over her shoulders, ready to get the heck out of there.

"Come back soooooon!" Jemma snickered playfully to Willow's back as she practically ran out the door.

* * *

It had taken Willow nearly half an hour to make her neck look normal, after drowning it in foundation. She didn't want Ward, or anyone for that matter seeing it and freaking out. She did, however, come to the realization that anyone that pissed him off was definitely in over their heads. She couldn't imagine the pain he could cause someone while he was coherent and making deliberate choices.

She made her way down to the gym, prepared to spend some time on the punching bags since her bullet wound was making a nice recovery and her neck was feeling a bit better after the steroid injection, but what she hadn't expected was Ward to have the same idea. She made her way in quietly, trying not to disturb him, intrigued by his precision and skill. His lean, muscular body moved with a powerful speed and accuracy that made her heart race just watching him. She briefly wondered how he could be so conditioned to tolerate the pain he must be feeling due to the injuries she'd accidentally witnessed. His mental control must be unreal, she thought to herself. It only took a split second for him to realize he wasn't alone—being an elite specialist, he was trained to be hyperaware of his surroundings.

"Are you just going to stand around all day, or work out?" He asked, not bothering to turn and look at her.

"I thought I'd stand here and ogle you for a bit. That and you're dropping your left hand when you throw your right."

He turned with a smirk to look at her, and she was caught off guard by the way his sweaty t-shirt clung to his torso, and the scruff on his face that he normally didn't keep made his jaw line….well, she wasn't sure, but it made something in her belly flutter.

His eyes traveled to her throat, searching for the damage he'd caused and she quickly moved to the bench to set her water bottle down, hoping like hell she'd done a good enough job of covering her bruised skin.

"Maybe you should get over here then and show me how it's done." She could feel his eyes on her back.

"Absolutely. It's always fun when the student outshines the master." She teased walking past him, bumping him playfully out of her way. The tension eased, and she was determined to keep things as normal as possible.

He watched her as she delivered perfectly planned kicks and punches—and he praised her on her head kicks. Those had always been her favorite. She loved being able to kick someone in the temple and drop them to the ground, and she was fantastic at it.

"I'm pretty sure you're the pot calling the kettle black."

"Huh?" She asked, dropping her hands to her sides, sweat dripping down her neck.

"Your hands. _You're_ dropping _your_ left hand when you throw your right."

"No I'm not." She protested. He nodded at her with a crooked grin. "No. I'm not."

He moved up behind her and she was keenly aware of his presence, mere centimeters from her.

"Throw one slow. I'll show you." He directed and she could feel his breath on her ear as his hand reached out to guide her left hand up. His other hand had moved to her hip like it had a thousand times before, tugging it backward a bit to increase her throws. But suddenly she couldn't seem to focus on anything except the feel of him and her heart was thudding in her chest. She could sense the rise and fall of his chest against her back and she knew he must be feeling something that hadn't been there before, too.

"I'd hardly call that dropping my hand." She breathed out softly.

"I'm sorry I hurt you." His voice was barely a whisper. His hand moved to brush back the hair on her neck and she shivered involuntarily.

"I'm not going to keep telling you I'm okay. You're just going to have to believe me." Her eyes closed at the feel of his skin on hers.

"I'm not…..Willow, I don't-"He stopped short when the door suddenly opened, and they both practically jumped away from each other as Mack unexpectedly entered the gym. There was an awkward pause between the three of them and Ward nodded at him, reaching down to grab his towel and left, leaving her standing there, breathing hard and absolutely confused.

* * *

He managed to avoid her the rest of the afternoon and that night sleep evaded her. Every single nerve ending in her entire body felt like they were fighting a war against resting—it was like she could still feel his fingertips against her skin and it made her feel like she was losing her mind. She wanted to know so very badly how the rest of Ward's unfinished sentence would have ended, but she'd been too overwhelmed in the moment to chase after him to find out. Mack at least had the decency to pretend nothing weird had happened, for which she was grateful. She wondered what Ward was doing at that very moment. Was he sleeping? Staring at his ceiling thinking the same things as her? Not thinking about them at all? Having another nightmare? She hoped whatever demons haunted him in his dreams gave him some peace tonight.

And she prayed that hers would too.


	16. Chapter 16

_DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine._

Chapter 16

The next week had been exceptionally busy. Ward and May had traveled to a potential Hydra base in Wales to scope out the layout and get a feel for entry points and any potential dangers. He was glad Coulson had sent May, because luckily she didn't care for talking any more than he did. It was strictly no nonsense, business as usual, just like he preferred. It was a nice distraction from the stormy-eyed brunette he couldn't seem to get out of his head.

That day in the gym he'd known it was a bad idea the instant he'd touched her, but the pull kept getting stronger and stronger, no matter how hard he fought it. The way she had sat with him, quite literally holding him together after he'd damn near killed her in his sleep—it was chipping away bit by bit at his carefully crafted armor, built from years of torment and hatred. He didn't know if he was relieved or pissed that Mack had interrupted—most likely the former because he really had no idea what to say to her. He wanted to tell her that he didn't know how to "do" whatever "this" was. That he was no good for her. But he'd also wanted to grab her and hold onto her for dear life—and that scared the absolute shit out of him.

Even when he'd had feelings for Skye, it had always been more of a physical chemistry. She had been fun to be around and it had just happened over time. They were never serious, or even a couple—in fact, there were truthfully only a handful of times they'd kissed, and at least two of those times didn't count because they'd been fairly certain they were about to die. Then she'd been shot-even her quaking abilities couldn't stop the unexpected bullets in time, and everything after that happened quickly. She'd been given the GH-325 and taken to an off grid inhuman village of sorts called the Afterlife. She'd met another inhuman there by the name of Lincoln Campbell and developed feelings for him—causing her to make the decision to leave S.H.I.E.L.D. and stay where she felt like she could be herself and learn to control her abilities better. Ward had been hurt and angry at first, but over time he was more relieved that she was alive and happy.

And then Willow came barreling into his life and turned everything upside down, again—only this time, it was different. He wasn't one to believe in fate, but even from the first day he met her, it was like something was forcing them together. When she got shot saving Fitz, he'd tried to convince himself that his emotions were because of what had happened with Skye—but the truth was that he'd let himself get stupidly attached. He had actually started looking forward to their 3am treadmill runs and teaching her how to cook in their downtime. He was amazed by the way she could literally almost burn down a kitchen, but turn around and drop a 200lb man to the ground. He loved the way she got angry when he bested her, but then she'd always work two thousand times harder the next time. He loved the way she was selfless, and how she seemed to light up the room when she walked in—and the way her laugh had become like a lifeline. Her mere presence soothed and calmed him. She was like a drug—one he'd slowly become addicted to and now he wasn't sure if he could quit. He had begun to realize he was completely and totally screwed.

The afternoon he and May had gotten back, he'd nearly had a heart attack because Willow had been nowhere to be found—and then Coulson told him he'd sent her out on a fucking op—alone. Agent May had pulled him aside and sternly reminded him that Willow was an agent and he needed to get his emotions in check. She was absolutely right…..and he was absolutely failing at it.

He decided to join Fitz and Simmons in the lab where he thoroughly tore apart, cleaned and put back together every gun he owned in an attempt to focus on anything but how long Willow's mission was taking. Finally, after what had felt like days, she'd come through the door to the lab, her hair in minor disarray and sweat on her temple, grinning smugly at Fitz. She handed him a gun he'd never seen before.

"Fitz….you, my friend….are ahhhhhmazing. Those tracking rounds led me right where I needed to go."

"You're bloody right they did!" They high-fived. "Finally, someone who appreciates my work…." Fitz raised an eyebrow at Ward pointedly. Ward shrugged.

Willow finally glanced over at him giggling softly.

"You made it back."

"And in one piece." He smirked. "So, I leave for four days and it's like you're all grown up…"

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's what those seven Hydra assholes thought too." She had a wickedly triumphant gleam in her eyes and his chest tightened. He should have been with her.

"So Willow…" Jemma piped up. "Coulson's given us all a night off finally. There's this little Australian pub we like to stop at. Say you'll come."

"Of course! I wouldn't miss the opportunity to see my two favorite scientists completely snockered." Willow teased.

"I'll have you know I could drink anyone on this BUS under the table, missy." The biochemist retorted.

"It's true. She did once when we stopped in Germany. It was embarrassing for the rest of us. Particularly Fitz, when Jemma tried to strip-"

"Agent Ward! Hush your mouth!"

Ward winked at Willow and she couldn't help but laugh, envisioning the prim and proper scientist up on the bar.

"So does that mean you'll be coming too?" Willow asked, removing her ear piece and vest.

"Uhh…nah. I think I'll sit this one out." Ward replied as he locked the clip in place on his fully cleaned icer.

"What? Nooo. You have to come!" She whined, playfully. "I need to see what a drunken Agent Ward looks like."

"Wardy-poo here hasn't been out with us since Skye ran off with another man." Hunter volunteered from the door, but quickly held up his hands in surrender when Ward's glare turned lethal. "Fitz, the boss needs you."

Jemma busied herself with some specimen samples, while Willow tried to push down the knot in her stomach after Hunter's comment. All these nagging feelings were really starting to annoy her.

"Well, maybe I'll be lucky enough to find some super-hot Aussie guy with one of those amazing accents to entertain me for the evening." She waggled her eyebrows and faked a smile, waving a quick goodbye as she exited the room, pretending to be far more excited than she actually was.

Ward's fists clenched and unclenched under the table at her comment. They were SO and agent in training. Entertaining the idea of anything more was out of the question. Not to mention ridiculous and completely careless. But even still, he couldn't seem to shake the irritation at the thought of her spending her evening off in the company of another male.

He wordlessly picked up his guns and walked out.

* * *

Willow stared at herself in the mirror for a moment, thankful to be wearing clothes that didn't have blood, sweat and tears on them. Her long dark hair was down for the first time in ages, reaching her shoulder blades and her little black dress looked better on her than she remembered. It was probably from all of the grueling physical training, she thought to herself. She was never one for much make up—much preferring to keep it simple, but she did like eyeliner and a little gloss.

When she was finally content with her appearance, she headed out to meet Jemma and Bobbi and as she passed through the living area, Ward was sitting on one of the couches reading a report. He looked up and when he caught sight of her he stilled, his eyes darkening.

"Hey…" She blushed slightly.

"Hey you." He cleared his throat.

"You sure you won't come with us?" She asked. "It'll be more fun than whatever you're reading in that folder I assure you."

He held up the folder in his hand. "No way. This is definitely my most interesting read to date."

"And you said we needed to work on _my_ lying skills…." She teased. "but, um….if you change your mind, you know where to find us I guess." She headed to the door.

"Hey Willow…."

"Yeah?" She turned around far too quickly, her breath catching.

"You look really nice. Be safe."

"Thanks." She bit her lip. "I will."

And then she was gone.

And he was already going insane.

Ward stared at the ceiling for the next twenty minutes. Then he damn near paced a hole in the floor. He had tried every technique he knew to silence his mind, and nothing—absolutely nothing could keep him from imagining her leaving the bar with some Australian rugby asshole to do all kinds of things that made him silently rage with an anger he didn't even understand.

Finally, after not being able to handle it any longer, he headed back to his quarters, took a glance in the mirror, dabbing on some cologne and grabbed his jacket. A drink or two wouldn't hurt anything he kept telling himself as he headed out into the night.


	17. Chapter 17

_DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine._

Chapter 17

"Yeah so, on our honeymoon she decides she wants to go skiing in the middle of a giant fucking snowstorm and we end up getting stuck at the bottom of an avalanche…"

"The storm wasn't that bad. You always make it sound worse than it was." Bobbi sipped on her cocktail.

"An avalanche, Bobs. A freaking avalanche. That was God trying to tell me what to expect being married to you."

"What? Adventure?"

"No. That I was married to the ice queen." Hunter smirked.

"You know she's going to kill you in cold blood one of these days…." Willow laughed, as Bobbi threatened to stab him with a fork.

"Oh she loves it." Hunter blew Bobbi a kiss.

"Just get a room already." Jemma teased. "Or better yet, just get remarried."

"Right? It's not like we can't bloody hear you at 2am after you've snuck in her bunk." Fitz stated, taking a swig of his ale. Bobbie flushed crimson.

"On that note, I'm headed to the bar for another drink….." Willow stood, raising her empty glass with a grin as she headed toward the middle of the pub.

It was a nice little tavern—dimly lit with memorabilia covering the walls. It had several pool tables and dart boards, a small stage off to the side for anyone wanting to perform. She was about to order another drink when a tall, muscular guy with blonde hair and baby blues sat down beside her and called to the bartender that her next round was on him.

"It's not every day I have the chance to buy a gorgeous American lass a coldie."He drawled.

"Is that so? I bet you say that to all the ladies." She smirked.

"Not all of 'em. Just the pretty ones." He grinned.

He was attractive, she'd admit that—in a young, college rugby star kind of way. He'd make an okay distraction, she thought to herself—or a distraction from her distraction, which was presently _reading_ for no good reason instead of coming out with them. _Whatever_. Okay, so maybe she was a _little_ bummed out that Ward bailed, but that didn't mean she had to waste her night.

"What brings a girl like you down under?"

"Work actually. Lame, right?" She answered, sipping her beer.

"Not if it brings you here as my company for the evening." He didn't even bother hiding the fact that he was checking her out, and even though it was flattering, she internally groaned. At least she knew what his intentions were, she supposed. "The name's Dane. You?" He grinned.

"Willow." She smiled before knocking back the rest of her drink.

"Sexy name for a sexy girl." Dane winked.

"Easy there killer. Don't use all your lines on me at once now." Willow teased, earning a laugh. It was then that she realized she was going to need a lot more alcohol to enjoy her night, and to clear her mind of her SO. "Say, what about a game of darts? Loser buys the next round."

"Aye, you're on."

* * *

"Well I'll be….Ward decided to show his face after all." Hunter grinned, taking his third shot of whiskey.

"How curious…" Jemma smirked at the others. "I wonder what could have possibly drawn the brooding specialist out of hiding?"

"And you claim to be the smarter of us. By matter of reason and deduction, the man just needed a drink to relieve some tension." Fitz winked, dipping a chip into some salsa and shoved it in his mouth.

"Yeah, tension from sitting on the BUS alone, wondering what a certain female agent was up to." Jemma playfully coughed, nodding Ward's direction.

Ward's eyes scanned the pub for the girl with the long, dark hair that he couldn't seem to shake. It only took a moment to find her—she was at the dart boards, and currently the center of attention of a guy worse than his imagination had created. He wanted to approach her, but thought better of it. He didn't want to ruin her evening if she was actually enjoying herself—maybe he shouldn't have come, he thought to himself. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the rest of the team waving him over, so he reluctantly moved to their table and took a seat.

"Wardy-Poo! We are so happy to see you!" Hunter draped his arm around Ward's neck in jest. Ward rolled his eyes at the mention of his ridiculous nickname.

"Here, have a beer. They're bloody fantastic!" Fitz said, pouring him a glass from the pitcher.

"I must say I'm surprised, Simmons isn't up on the bar yet." Ward joked, nodding at Fitz in thanks. He took a swig, hoping it would take the edge off.

"Agent Ward, if you bring that up one more time, I'll make sure I give you a nasty alien virus the next time you land yourself in my med bay." Jemma narrowed her eyes on the specialist.

"Okay okayyyy." He grinned. "You don't have to be all Dr. Jekyll on me. It's quite terrifying."

"If you only knew…." Jemma gave her best evil laugh, which caused the whole table to bust up laughing.

They spent the next several minutes talking and joking, and Ward had to admit he'd missed spending time like this with his teammates—but he still couldn't take his eyes off of Willow. She'd played three rounds of darts with the douchebag now and he was finding it harder and harder to watch him touch her arm, or graze the small of her back—and he wasn't sure how he'd missed that her dress was ridiculously short. It hadn't looked that short on the plane, _had it_?

"She's been letting him win." Bobbi whispered to Ward.

"Huh?"

"Willow. She's been letting him win. She's bored."

"She seems to be having an okay time to me." Ward shrugged, playing the situation off.

"Pull your head out of your ass, Ward." Bobbi said, pointedly. "It's not like we all don't see it….and trust me…..I know when a girl is bored."

Ward slammed the rest of his beer, avoiding the fact that he was being called out. He hated being called out, but he also couldn't deny that she might be right and that made his mood lift a bit. He watched as Willow and Douchebag made their way back to the bar and he watched her body language more closely. She was turned away from him, staring at the wall behind the bartender. She was nodding but not talking much, and now that he'd thought about it, he hadn't heard her musical laugh ring out for quite some time.

"I swear mate, if you don't just go over there, I'm going to give you an even worse nickname. Honestly. Don't underestimate my creativity, Wardy-Poo."

"You're a real jackass, you know that Hunter?" Ward took a deep breath and stood.

"Yes but, it works. Now, go get rid of the schmuck and put a smile on our girl's face." Hunter winked.

* * *

Willow was in the middle of pretending to care what Dane was saying when she'd caught a glimpse of Ward coming in the front door to the pub. He'd shown up anyway. She felt a glimmer of hope, and then it faded when she realized he went straight to the table, and she was left to entertain her new Aussie friend. After three rounds of darts, and letting him win because clearly his ego was in danger, she was losing serious interest. The guy was nice enough, but just not her type—that, and she could feel the dark, brooding eyes from across the room on her back.

She was just plotting how to tell Dane that she was "tired" and going to call it a night when she felt his presence behind her, before she even saw him. Her heart fluttered as Ward slid onto the barstool on the other side of her.

"Is this seat taken?" He flashed his signature panty-dropping smile and she felt her whole body flush. Normally she would attempt to conceal checking him out-but she'd already had a few beers and a shot or two, and whatever cologne he had on was now driving her mad. Seeing him relaxed in jeans, a fitted white t-shirt and his black bomber jacket had her heart thumping out of her chest. It had to be the alcohol. Yes, _definitely_ the alcohol, she thought.

"That depends. I was waiting on my boss, but I'm not sure he's coming." She bit her lip.

"I believe, he took the night off and sent me instead." He winked, nodding at the bartender. "Grey goose on ice please."

"So what do ya think, babe? Think we should get outta here? My place isn't that far." Mr. Blonde Hair Blue Eyes interrupted, and suddenly she found his company much less tolerable. It was clear he wasn't digging the cock block-age. Little did he know that she'd had zero intentions of going back to his place, whether Ward had arrived, or not.

Ward had to try not to reach across and completely pummel the guys face in. If he tried to look down her dress one more time he wasn't sure he'd have the restraint—but it turned out he didn't need to.

Willow leaned in and spoke quietly into the douchebag's ear, which made Ward's skin crawl. Blondie looked up at Ward with a strange look, picked up his drink and walked away wordlessly with a slightly drunken scowl. She took a shot of her schnapps, noting Ward's confusion.

"I take it your response was no?" He questioned, absentmindedly tracing the rim of his glass with his fingertip before slamming it.

"Something like that." She fought a grin as she finally glanced up at him. "So tell me, what on earth could have possibly drug you away from your most interesting read to date?"

"Well, I finished it-and seeing as how hanging out on the BUS in the company of May and Coulson wasn't exactly the most appealing option, I figured the least I could do was make sure my trainee wasn't being taken advantage of by some skeezeball."

"I see."

"But it seems you don't need my help after all." He nodded to the bartender for another round.

"I wouldn't say that necessarily. I might have mentioned to Blondie that you knew how to break every bone in the human body about six different ways….and that I really, _really_ hate being called babe."

Ward couldn't stop the chuckle that nearly caused him to spit his drink.

"That's…..awesome. Really. You could have at least warned me that I might get jumped by Vanilla Ice and Company when I leave."

"Ohhh, I'm confident you can handle it. And if not, you know I've got your six. I can do some serious damage with these heels. Just sayin'."

"I'll remember that the next time Coulson sends us on assignment." He chided.

"Maybe I should wear them to practice sparring with you. I could use all the help I can get." She tipped her shot back, savoring the burn in her throat. "Which by the way, my ass is still freaking sore from that leg sweep of yours last week. Jerk."

"Yeah well, I'm pretty sure the next person trying to kill you isn't going wait around for you to adjust your ponytail."

Willow gasped. "I did NO such-"

"Ohhh yes you did. You left yourself open wider than the Grand Canyon for me. Your ass deserved to be sore." His eyebrows raised in challenge.

"Yeah….I can think of about a hundred other things my ass deserves, and that is _not_ one of them." She grumbled. Somehow this conversation had taken a wild turn, and she was positive now that slight intoxication was the culprit. Her rear end was not usually a topic of normal conversation.

"Better for your ass to be sore now, than for me to have to continually save it."

"Oh no you didn't." She turned her body to face him, poking him with a single finger in the shoulder. "I can't believe you think that-"

"Not to interrupt your rant, but there's a ginger heading this way that's been undressing me with her eyes for the last ten minutes, and I could probably use your assistance." Ward groaned.

"Oh, you mean the one that's been crossing and uncrossing her legs wayyyy too many times to not have something super nasty going on in the land down under? What was that? You want me to save your what?"

"I'm not going to say it."

"You know…I think I need to use the ladies room." She said with an evil smirk.

"Willow…..wait. No. What are you-" His voice was low and comically threatening.

"Don't worry. I won't be too long. Just a little payback for making me wait around with Blondie." She winked, walking away in time to catch a glimpse of the leggy red head. She definitely wouldn't leave him too long. She might be playful, but she wasn't exactly in the mood for sharing tonight.

* * *

Willow purposefully waited about five minutes before making her way back to the bar—to find Ward, who had clearly seen her coming, tucking a strand of hair behind Gingy's ear with a smirk. Her eyes narrowed as she watched him deliberately lean into her personal space to whisper something into her ear and she giggled. She fucking _giggled_. Something inside her shifted, and an unfamiliar emotion coursed through her veins-one she couldn't put a name to. Ward's eyes met hers again, with a challenging grin. Two could play _that_ game.

She stomped over and threw her purse up on the bar between them with an angry huff.

"Are you _CHEATING ON ME_?" She shrieked.

Ward's face went white as a ghost.

"What? No!"

"Don't lie to me _Robert_! I _SAW_ you! And to _THINK_ I was going to marry you!"

Realization crossed Ward's face as he finally caught on.

"Baby! No! It's not what you think!" Ward cooed.

"Oh yeah? Ginger Snap here, was about three seconds from having your tongue down her throat!" She screeched. By now half the pub was watching and the red head's face matched her hair from embarrassment.

"Please, sweetheart—"

"Oh don't you _sweetheart_ me! We're _THROUGH_!" She shouted, grabbing her purse, storming toward the door—winking at their other teammates on the way out, relieving the startled shock on their faces. About thirty seconds later, Ward came barreling out the door behind her. She was leaning against a lamp post with a giant grin on her face.

"You're absolutely insane." A genuine smile crept across his face, and Willow couldn't help but think how good it looked on him. "What?" His head tilted slightly in question.

"Oh nothing." She shrugged playfully.

"What?" He asked again, curious.

"You're smiling. I like it." She knew her cheeks must be rosy, but she chalked it up once again to the alcohol.

"So are you."

"I know, right? I can't believe I'm able to smile after being cheated on, _Robert_ …" She bit her lower lip, forcing back a laugh. "You should have seen your face."

He made his way to her and playfully poked her in the side. She reached to stop him from tickling her but his hand instead caught hers, their fingers instinctively twining together. Their gazes locked and the entire world stopped, neither of them saying a word, but neither of them moving to let go.

"At least let me prove my undying love for you, _Addison_." The wink that followed caused her stomach to flutter.

"You're going to have to work awfully hard at that. I'm feeling highly inadequate after seeing your ginger friend." She pouted.

He gently tugged her away from the lamp post, never letting go of her hand as they continued to walk down the dimly lit street lining the beach, of mostly closed shops.

"No need to worry, sweetheart. I've only got eyes for you."

The tone of his voice made her suddenly question if they were still acting or not. Surely he was. Or maybe she could once again blame the liquor-but maybe she didn't want to.

"Is that so?" She blushed.

"Indeed."

They walked in comfortable silence, hand in hand for over an hour listening to the waves crash into the shore of Gold Coast. At one point they'd been stopped by a local photographer offering photos on the beach front. Surprisingly, Ward had insisted on paying for a photo-the photographer assuming they were a couple kept telling them to "get close, get cozy." He had pulled her to him, her back to his chest and for the first time in a very long time, everything had felt right in the world. The air had cooled from the currents and when she'd shivered as he pulled away, he didn't hesitate to take off his jacket and wrap it around her shoulders. She didn't know what had changed in the last week, but at that moment she didn't have the desire to question it, and seeing a glimpse of the carefree Grant Ward had been a surprise she didn't know she wanted.

When they realized what time it was, they decided they should probably head back to the BUS. The others were most likely already there and the last thing they needed was to run into Coulson or May if they were late. Fitz and Simmons had made it back—they could hear the low classical music coming from their bunk, but Bobbi and Hunter were still M.I.A. Being back in the atmosphere of the plane had caused an awkwardness to fill the air as they walked toward the back to their quarters. As she reached her door she turned to thank him for spending the evening with her but hadn't expected him to be so close and she laughed nervously, like some teenage girl getting dropped off by her boyfriend after a homecoming dance.

"Thank you for-"

"I had a great-"

They both started, eliciting another laugh from the both of them.

"Ladies first." He winked.

"Lady? Since when did I graduate to a lady from major pain in your ass?" She stuck out her tongue playfully.

"You're right. You're definitely a pain in my ass." He joked. "But I wouldn't want it any other way…"

She looked up at him.

"Just think, if you hadn't given up your reading, I might still be trying to keep my virtue from Blondie right now." She chewed on her lip under his gaze. "I owe you a thank you."

She stepped backward clumsily and bumped into her door. He reached out, grabbing his jacket that was still over her shoulders and righted her, bringing her chest to chest with him now. Her breathing hitched at the closeness, but he didn't move. He didn't want to think about her with someone else. He didn't want to think at all. His forehead was millimeters from hers now and their noses barely touched, her palms resting flat against his chest. He was sure she could feel his wildly rampant heartbeat that was giving his traitorous emotions away.

"Ward…" She breathed softly, her fingertips gripping at his t-shirt and that was all it took. His lips brushed over hers and the tiny whimper that escaped her mouth made all rational thought fly out the window. His hands cupped either side of her face as she pulled him closer into her soft body, her desperation just as evident as his as she nipped at his lower lip with her teeth, before allowing her own to part so he could taste her fully for the first time. He pulled back for a moment to catch their breath, his thumb tracing softly over her kiss swollen lips.

He was just about to speak when there was a click of a door. Startling them both out of their moment of weakness, they looked up to see just who they were going to have to explain their actions to, but nothing could have prepared either of them for the face that greeted them.

"Uhhh woahhh…..hey there Robot…."

"Skye?" The shock in Ward's voice was clear. "What are you doing here?"

He pulled back from Willow, which caused a flood of embarrassment, among a string of other emotions to rush through her, most likely displaying on her cheeks.

"Well, I'm definitely not sneaking around like a horny teenager if that's what you're asking." She nodded at the pair, quirking an eyebrow.

Willow shrugged out of Ward's jacket and handed it to him wordlessly, the look on her face telling him all he needed to know about where her head was at in that moment.

"Goodnight Agent Ward." Willow said curtly, opening her door, forcing a polite nod in Skye's direction.

"Willow wait…." He called out to a closed door. On the other side, a very confused Willow sunk into the comfort of her bunk, willing away the new emotions threatening to drown her. Why did she have to feel? She'd been so careless. A silent tear crept down her cheek as she thought about how this was the best night she'd ever had, and how it could never happen again.

* * *

"So umm….that's the new rookie?" Skye questioned.

"Don't. Just don't right now. When did you get in?" Ward questioned. He was torn between begging Willow to open her door, and trying to find out what in the hell Skye was doing on the BUS. After John had mentioned that she would turn up, it felt like more than a coincidence, which meant she could potentially be in danger and that put him on high alert.

"About an hour ago. Coulson asked me to help with some encryption stuff and something about tracking down a location. He got some intel from another agent that he wanted me to take a look at." The hacker explained. "Don't look so happy to see me."

Ward rolled his eyes.

"Oh right. Sorry. I ruined date night. Does Coulson know?"

"Uh no. This is….you know what, nevermind." Ward opened the door to his own room and slammed it behind him.

"Well alrightyyy then." Skye blew out a breath. "Don't throw a welcome back party or anything…sheesh." She muttered heading back to her own temporary bunk.

Ward wanted to punch something. He knew Willow was fifteen feet from him and hurting, and there was no way she'd let him in—he knew that. She was too strong. He stared at the picture in his wallet of the two of them on the beach, and knew that he may never get a chance to hold her that close again. The sweet taste of her lips had felt like home-a home he'd never known existed. A home he didn't think he deserved.

A home that life would never allow him.


	18. Chapter 18

_DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine._

 _Author's Note: I am SO sorry for the delay. My mother passed away and it took me awhile to clear the fog in my head to even think about writing. I haven't abandoned the story, just taking my time trying to get it right. Willow was a little brat this chapter and made it tough to put on paper. Hope you enjoy!_

Chapter 18

Ward had to force himself to get up and head toward the briefing room. Normally he'd be the first one there, ready and waiting for orders, but this particular morning he just didn't care. The only thing of importance to him was Willow and making sure she was alright. He'd stopped by her room on the way, but as usual her bed was made and she was nowhere in sight. He knew she probably wouldn't be in a conversational mood, but he'd been around her enough to learn her body language. He knew what each crease of her forehead meant. When she chewed on the inside of her cheek, she was concentrating. Every blank stare meant that her walls were up. The way her eyes seemed to rage like a hurricane when she was pissed or the way she bit her lip when she was trying to play innocent. He had made it just past the kitchen when he was jarred from his thoughts by Skye's voice.

"Don't even think about cruising by me without saying good morning, Robot."

With a grumble, he headed inside-figuring the quicker he appeased her, the quicker he could get to Willow. Upon entering, a very unsettling culinary sight lay on the counter top before her, and he watched in mild disgust as she shoved a bite of what he assumed were eggs in her mouth.

"It looks like a buffet threw up on your plate-and it wasn't sure if it was breakfast or lunch…" He scrunched his nose. "Please tell me that isn't peanut butter on your eggs."

"Don't judge me. It's what I called you in here to talk about." She replied popping the top of a Dr. Pepper can.

"Since when do you drink soda?" Ward stared at her perplexed. "Look, I'm not sure what Lincoln's been feeding you but-"

"I'm pregnant." Skye whispered so softly he barely heard it.

"Say that again?"

She pointed nonchalantly to the tiny bump of a stomach he hadn't noticed she was carrying. Ward's eyes grew wide in surprise. That definitely wasn't what he'd expected.

"So you…." He pointed to her belly. "You're gonna be a mom?"

They were both smiling now as the realization finally hit.

"But you can't tell anyone yet. Only you, Coulson and Jemma know. Mostly because we don't exactly know how my quaking ability affects the little bean." She grinned.

"I'm happy for you. Honestly. You and Lincoln will make great parents." Ward swallowed. He imagined how this conversation might have really hurt him a year ago, but now he only felt happiness for her. He secretly hoped one day he might know the feeling of being a parent, even though he knew he'd never be worthy of a tiny, innocent human being.

"Well….that's not all. Lincoln and I talked and we both agreed we want you to be the godfather."

Ward coughed hard in shock and disbelief, not sure that he'd heard correctly.

"Uh…what?!" He ran his fingers through his hair, letting out a nervous laugh.

"You heard me. I know we've had a weird past but...we agreed that if there was anyone that could and would protect our child, it would be you. I hope you'll agree." She smiled sincerely.

Ward was completely dumbfounded, but he couldn't stop the proud grin that spread across his face.

"You're...sure?"

She gave an exaggerated nod.

"I…would be honored."

"YAY!" She screeched, moving around the counter to hug him. The moment she was in his arms he knew she wasn't the one for him, and she never was. The way it felt now was different-it felt like family, not attraction. He squeezed her, suddenly hyper aware that there was a baby between them—and because the gods above must have hated him, Willow walked by at the very moment of their embrace. He practically jumped away from Skye, and Willow's eyes darkened critically, before quickly masking it with her signature hardened gaze that seemed to pierce right through you. Before he could blink, she was gone.

"Shit!" Ward growled. "I've gotta go."

"What? Ward!" Skye asked in confusion.

"We'll talk. I promise." He assured her before darting down the hallway. "Willow wait!" He called out to her back.

Out of respect, she stopped, but not because she wanted to. _No_. She wanted to throat punch the asshole. She turned around slowly to face him, remembering very quickly that he was a _beautiful_ asshole, but an asshole nonetheless.

"Yes Agent Ward?"

She could see the immediate frustration on his face at the use of his proper name. _Good_ , she thought.

"Can I please speak with you for a minute?"

"Talk away. We have briefing in two minutes." She replied with the straightest face she could muster.

"Fine." He let out a huff of annoyance at her disregarding attitude. "If that's what you want….about last night—"

"With all due respect, Sir…we both had a little too much to drink. I can forget about it if you can." She stared hard at a button on his shirt, avoiding his eyes at all costs. She knew she wasn't fooling him, but she wasn't going to stop trying.

He stepped closer now in challenge, not even bothering to care who was watching, and her breathing hitched involuntarily at his nearness, telling him all he needed to know. What they were feeling wasn't some product of alcohol—and she definitely felt it too. He leaned in closer to speak in her ear.

"You're a terrible liar." He breathed.

"I know." She pulled back looking up at him with hurt in her eyes. "And you're a really great one."

"Willow—"She pulled away and he felt the ache in his chest. If she only knew how true that statement was, she probably would hate him more than she did. Sadly, he'd been truthful in all things related to her. "You don't understand—none of this is what you think."

"You don't need to explain anything. You owe me nothing. Now if you'll excuse me, I've agreed to go with Bobbi and Hunter on assignment and I really need to get to work. "

He was on her heels all the way to the briefing room, where Coulson was already talking and gave them a slightly irritated nod for being late. Willow moved to stand by Hunter, avoiding him altogether. His jaw clenched in frustration.

"Bobbi, Hunter and Willow, let us know when you touch down in enemy territory. Remember, this is a civilian rescue only. Only worry about intel if it is readily and easily accessible. We need to get out as many hostages as possible and we're on limited time."

"Sir, shouldn't myself or Agent May accompany them?" Ward spoke up concerned.

"Agent May will be piloting since the flight plan is risky. I need you here with Skye and I'm already late for a meeting with Agent Hand that I can't miss." Coulson stated, wrapping up the meeting and shooting a glance of finality at Ward.

"I know it's not my call, Sir—but I feel like my skills are better served in the field than babysitting Skye." He protested.

"We have _precious_ cargo on the plane that requires your particular skill set to protect Agent Ward. That's an order."

Knowing that he was referring to his future godson or goddaughter, he nodded once in defeat as the team headed out on mission.

Willow didn't even bother glancing in his direction-she knew if she did her resolve would cave. The night before, she'd been hurt by his knee-jerk reaction to pull away from her, and mortified that he would do so in front of Skye whom she knew he'd shared feelings with, but she concluded she couldn't hold it against him. When she woke that morning she'd planned to have a quick, professional conversation with him and keep things light. She'd just wanted to find out where they stood and if she'd read more into things than she should have-but her plan had gone from quick and easy, to avoid and ignore in the blink of an eye when she'd seen the pair in an intimate embrace in the kitchen where she and Ward had some great memories. It was too much. She absolutely hated the feelings brewing inside her. She never let anyone get that close to her-she'd been so naive-but all she could think about was the way she felt in his arms and the feel of his lips against hers, and that just fueled her anger. She thought about how she should have just gone home with Blondie for a no strings attached evening instead of foolishly thinking Ward actually wanted her. Clearly he still had some buried feelings for Skye and she wasn't interested in being second to the almighty Quake. She rolled her eyes at that thought as she pulled on her gear, preparing for combat.

* * *

Willow felt a tug on her elbow as she was about to board the quinjet and came face to face with Ward for the second awkward time that morning.

"Sir?"

"Stop calling me sir. Look, I know you're upset-but please don't carry that out into the field. Emotions get people killed Willow. Just….be safe." She couldn't deny that his eyes were full of worry, and for a moment all she wanted to do was hurl herself into his arms. She was nervous as hell. The last time she'd went on a mission this big she got shot. Then she remembered why Ward was afraid-it wasn't about her, it was about what had happened in the past.

"No need to worry, Sir…er…Agent Ward. No more emotions, no more rookies getting shot. Got it." She knew it was a low blow, but she couldn't stop it from slipping past her lips.

"Right." He nodded with nonchalance turning abruptly to walk away, and her traitorous heart clenched. Maybe she'd done it, she thought as she strapped herself in her seat. Maybe she'd pushed him away, which was for the best. But then she could have sworn she heard him threaten Hunter on his way out to bring her back in one piece or he'd annihilate him.

"Well…." Hunter blew out a breath as he buckled in next to her. "Wardy-Poo is definitely over the moon for you, missy…"

"Ha." She rolled her eyes, desperately not wanting to have that conversation.

"I'm serious."

"Me too."

"What happened last night? You two high-tailed it out of the pub to go reconcile your fake marriage ….now this?" Hunter grinned, nudging her shoulder with his own.

"As if you should be giving marriage advice, fake or not." Willow said pointedly.

"Touché." Hunter chuckled. "Bloody spit it out. I can see you need to."

"Let's just say, it's apparent he has feelings for someone else."

"You sure about that? He came out to that pub for you last night. Ward never does that."

"Only for his _rookies_ …" She bit out.

"Not all of them." Bobbi grinned as the jet took off. "Just one."

Willow stared intensely at her teammate, letting that info sink in.

"But Hunter said he hadn't been out since Skye left."

"Right. But I never said anything about him chasing after her. _She_ always showed up for _him_." Hunter winked.

"So wait—" Willow started, but suddenly the quinjet spun on its side, almost causing her to throw up.

"ENEMY FIRE! HANG ON!" Agent May called out. Willow's stomach lurched again as the jet dipped and weaved due to May's expert piloting skills. "We don't have much time—I've got to set it down. They've taken out our cloaking capability somehow so we have to move fast!"

Willow swallowed back her nerves as the three agents waited to exit at May's command.

"We get in, get out and go home in one piece. After all, Willow needs to make it back to find out just how skilled Wardy-Poo is, if ya know what I mean…plus I don't want to die at the hands of your boyfriend." Hunter waggled his eyebrows.

"God you're an asshole."

"You hear that Bobs, she's even starting to sound like him." He grinned as the door opened and they made their way out into sandy terrain with hidden hostiles trying to kill them and seven women and children counting on them.

They made their way carefully to the old abandoned storage facility that was supposedly holding the prisoners and all was suspiciously quiet. They'd yet to encounter the enemy. Deciding that they could find them faster if they split up, they each took a sector and began searching.

After several minutes she heard Hunter on the coms say that he'd found something, and about that time Bobbi let out a yelp of pain. Willow was closest and ran as fast as she could, but nothing would have prepared her for the sight before her. There was a man, _no_ …. robot, _no_ …. _bionic_ man holding Bobbi by the throat against a storage locker door. Her face was turning purple as she fought against the mechanical arm with no use. Without any time to think, Willow grabbed the batons Bobbi had dropped and charged at it, slamming them down into its outstretched arm. It dropped Bobbi in surprise and she gasped for air. That's when it….he…whatever it was, turned on Willow.

Her heart stopped and the batons dropped from her hands as she was met with the last pair of eyes she'd ever expected.

"Liam." Her voice was barely a whisper as she stared in confusion and shock.

"WILLOW RUN!" Bobbi choked out, but she ignored her, her feet moving of their own accord toward what was once her big brother.

"Liam…" She whispered, reaching out cautiously. The mechanical hand twitched like it wanted to reach out for her, but stopped short. "It's me Liam. It's Willow."

He shook his head repeatedly as if trying to ignore his thoughts. Willow reached for his hand again and without warning his metal fist collided with her chest in a sickening blow, launching her 20 feet into another locker, knocking the wind completely out of her. She didn't want to move she hurt so bad, but scrambled up in pain, desperately trying to breathe and call out his name. As she stood, Liam took off full sprint away from the agents, running with incredibly inhuman speed and when he was about half a mile away she watched in horror as his biomechanical body violently exploded into oblivion.

Her scream was trapped in her throat but the raw pain and anguish was written all over her face. She didn't even register Hunter speaking to her, checking her for injuries, giving her orders. She was numb.

"Goddammit Willow! Ward is gonna kill me if you don't snap out of it!" Hunter yelled, gripping her chin, looking her dead in the eyes to get her attention.

She blinked back tears that had escaped and nodded quickly, pulling from all of her training, desperately trying to gather herself together and reassure him she could finish the mission. She didn't want to though. She wanted to lay right there and die.

"Are we bloody good?"

She nodded once more. Ignoring the excruciating pain, physical and mental-she fought to put one foot in front of the other, heading back to the locker with the hostages. Clutching her side, she ushered along three little boys and somehow managed to carry a little dark haired girl on her hip to the plane. They didn't encounter anymore soldiers-apparently her brother had been all they thought they needed.

 _Her brother_. Had he recognized her? She knew he had. He probably hated her all these years-she was the reason he'd been taken after all. She used her anger to fuel her through getting the hostages on the plane and dropped off at the S.H.I.E.L.D. rescue center. Once the team was on their way back to the BUS, she tucked herself away in the farthest seat hoping to be alone in her thoughts.

"You knew him, didn't you?" Bobbi asked softly, taking a seat next to her. Willow could see the purplish bruises already taking shape where she'd been pinned.

"He was my brother."

 _Was_.

Willow tucked her lips between her teeth trying to keep the tears from flowing, unable to speak more. Bobbi, surprised but not knowing what to say, reached down and took Willow's hand and squeezed it gently. She was thankful that she didn't pressure her to explain more.

She'd had Liam within her grasp and now he was gone again. She'd spent nearly two decades thinking he was dead, only to have him back for minutes and witness him die horrifically before her very eyes. Had he been tortured? Forced to become that biomechanical nightmare? _Of course he had_ -she knew deep down who was responsible. _Hydra_.

She had no idea how to begin putting herself back together this time. Her heart felt shattered all over again, and she suddenly felt like that frightened 7 year old girl again. As much as she hated to admit it, there was only one thing she needed. She needed Ward.


	19. Chapter 19

**_DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison is mine._**

 **Chapter 19**

"So I've narrowed down the locations where the GH-325 could potentially be, based on Coulson's intel…." Skye tapped her pencil against the table much to Ward's annoyance.

"Did Coulson say who his source was?" He asked, snatching the offending object from her hand.

"Always so grouchy. Promise me if I die you'll be nicer to my kid." She grumbled jokingly. "And just some other high up S.H.I.E.L.D. agent….not sure who."

"I can be nice."

She looked at him pointedly. He rolled his eyes.

"What? I can. When I want to be."

"Ha. I hope you're nicer to Agent Jamison than the rest of the world. She strikes me as the type that won't take your shit." Skye focused her attention back on her laptop.

"Understatement. I'm not exactly sure we're even speaking at the moment." Ward stated, his eyes finding the floor.

"Exactly how well do you know the new rookie?" Skye asked squinting at something on her screen.

"Look—it's not like we're….I don't know…" Ward stammered, not prepared for the awkwardness of the conversation.

"I don't mean like _that_ you big dummy—I caught you with your tongue down her throat. I _know_ about that. I mean, how well do you know her past?" Skye questioned, exasperated.

"I know enough. Why?" Ward asked, suddenly not liking the expression on her face.

"Well, you're probably going to kill me, but I did some precautionary digging when I found out you guys had a new team member. Call me paranoid."

"Skye."

"What?! Sorry! I just worry about all of you—I can't help it."

"Willow is the least of our worries." He pinched the bridge of his nose in irritation.

"Just hear me out. She's from Oregon, right? Her parents' names were Scott and Carmen according to her S.H.I.E.L.D. file."

"What about it?" His eyes narrowed on the hacker.

"Don't you find it interesting that these two scientists named Scott and Carmen Cavanaugh worked for S.H.I.E.L.D. and eventually turned Hydra while working on GH-325?"

She turned the screen around to show him the photo of the husband and wife. He couldn't deny that Willow strongly resembled the female scientist. He said nothing.

"Well? I mean, it seems freakishly coincidental that she would show up here and this information pops up randomly. It's like someone wants us to find it."

"Enough." Ward stood, clearly not happy. Someone did want them to find it, he was sure of it—and his bet was John Garrett. The question was why?

"Ward, you have to take this into consideration. This day and age, there have been Hydra agents everywhere. They've been infiltrating S.H.I.E.L.D. for decades now."

Ward's guilt pummeled him like a hurricane. Sure there were questions to be asked, but there had to be an explanation. Willow was good. She wasn't capable of being a traitor, not like he felt he was after the evidence kept piling up. How could he judge anyone after working for John Garrett and lying to the team for years? He'd been lying to himself for months that John was a good man. He didn't want to believe otherwise, and he was afraid of what it would mean to admit it could be true.

"You're looking for a connection Skye. We'll get to the bottom of it, but for now—leave Willow out of it."

"You're not willing to _see_ the connection because suddenly you've caught feelings, Robot."

"That has _nothing_ -"

"It has _EVERYTHING_ to do with it Ward. What if you're training the enemy?! What if Willow is Hydra?!" She snapped.

A thud came from behind the pair as Willow dropped her protection vest to the floor. Her face was swollen from crying and she had a nasty gash on her forehead.

" _Maybe_ ….you should come over here and fucking _ask me_ if I'm Hydra."

The room was so quiet for about five seconds, you could hear a pin drop-and then everyone started talking at once.

"Willow, c'mon let's get you cleaned -" Bobbi started to speak from behind her, but was cut off by Ward.

"What the hell happened? Are you alright?!" Ward was to her, gently lifting her hair to examine the wound, but she wasn't interested. Her focus was on Skye. She pushed past Ward, coming nose to nose with a Skye who was now standing taller with a straight face of her own.

"Ask." Willow demanded.

"Just remember….you wanted this." Skye quirked an eyebrow.

"Actually….I didn't want _ANY_ of this. _ASK_."

"Is your real last name Cavanaugh?"

"Yes."

Skye glanced to Ward with an 'I told you so' look.

"My name was changed when I was adopted at the age of seven. It's in my file. That all you've got?"

"So then, your parents were Dr. Scott and Carmen Cavanaugh?"

Willow swallowed hard. Hearing their names out loud always felt like being stabbed in the heart. She nodded.

"I guess you're aware that your parents were Hydra scum then."

"Skye that's enough—" Ward hissed.

"Hydra? What?! My parents were S.H.I.E.L.D. agents you incompetent hack!" Willow moved closer and Ward intervened, separating the two with his body.

"Tell me Willow….what kind of slimy experiments were they doing?!" Skye continued.

"Alright that's enough. I'm ordering you two to stand down!" Ward shouted, glancing over his shoulder at Bobbi and now Hunter, signaling that he may need help before long.

"Shut up Ward!" The girls said almost simultaneously—which would have been comical if they hadn't been ready to rip each other's throats out.

"Were they secretly giving Hydra GH-325? Giving the enemy the most powerful drug that exists? Are _YOU_ Hydra?!"

Willow's anger got the best of her and with raging strength, she pushed past Ward a second time, her fist connecting with Skye's jaw. Skye moved to punch her back but she side slipped her fist just as strong arms wrapped around her from behind dragging her back, causing excruciating pain in her mid-section.

"You have NO idea what you're talking about!" Willow screamed, fighting against Ward. Bobbi tried to calm her while Hunter stood between Skye and them. About that time Coulson and Mack showed up, keeping Skye from charging forward.

"Ward, get her out of here!" Coulson ordered and he did as he was told, doing his best to speak in soothing tones as he backed her out of the room. About halfway down the hall she was able to spin around out of his grasp and she tried to storm off. He followed after her, catching her arm to stop her but she hurled around shoving him in the chest, not doing much good. Tired of chasing her, he reached down, grabbed her hips and forcefully set her down on the bar in the lounge area. He was about to open his mouth to tell her to sit down and shut up, when she gasped, clutching at her ribs. Not even bothering to ask, he lifted her shirt up, careful not to expose her and cursed at the sight before him. Her entire rib cage was black, blue and swollen.

"Willow, what the hell happened?! Who did this to you?!"

"Don't worry about it. Go back to Skye. I'm sure…" She winced in pain. "…she's convinced everyone I'm some Hydra mole by now. You probably won't have to worry about training me anymore."

"Nobody thinks you're a Hydra mole." Ward countered.

"Your girlfriend does." Willow snapped.

"Girlfriend? You think—Willow. You've—"

"Just go." She looked away, doing everything in her power to keep from crying in front of him. She was jealous. She knew it, and now to her dismay, so did Ward.

Without giving it a second thought, he reached for her hand, brushing his thumb gently over her knuckles like he had many times before. Her tear-filled eyes met his and he said the only thing he could that made sense.

"I only have eyes for one girl, and it's not Skye."

She searched his face for any lack of sincerity and there was none. The weight of the day pressed down on her as she finally succumbed to her pain-giving into him, knowing it was what she needed. She breathed out his name as she squeezed his hand with her own before leaning into his chest, the painful sobs that followed causing her entire body to heave. He held her as tight as he could without causing her anymore physical pain and listened as she recounted what had happened.

It took everything to bury his rage and guilt as he comforted the only thing in the world that mattered to him now. It was his fault. If he'd just told Coulson his real mission, then Willow might not have encountered the super-soldier and wouldn't have had to watch her brother die. He didn't understand what John's role in it was, but it was becoming harder to deny that he'd possibly been working for, and put his faith in the wrong side—and man.

"I should have been there." He breathed into her hair, speaking more to himself than to her. "I should have kept you safe."

"How could you have known? I don't….I don't even know what I need right now, but it's not protection. I need….answers." She looked up. His heart clenched. She would hate him if she knew the truth.

"What you need is a doctor." He stated, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "I feel like I say that to you entirely too often."

"I'll be fine. I don't want to be on restriction again. I need to get out there and find out what happened to Liam." She tried to stand but he caught her shoulders.

"You're going to see Simmons if I have to carry you there myself." He raised an eyebrow, daring her to challenge him.

"Ward—"

"I mean it Willow."

"Fine." She huffed out, immediately regretting it. She used her shirt sleeve to wipe her face free of tears. "I don't even want to know what everyone is thinking about me. I could _never_ be Hydra. _Promise_ me that you know that."

"I believe you. But you'll have to talk with Coulson eventually. I'm sure he'll have some questions."

"He's probably going to kick me off the team." She attempted to stand once more.

"Coulson is the fairest man I know. Don't be so sure of that." Ward tried to comfort her, realizing he was a coward for not trusting his own advice. She nodded once before attempting to walk. He steadied her elbow as she made her way toward the med bay for what felt like the millionth time since her arrival on the BUS.

"I promise I won't storm off again. If you have other things you need to do you don't have to come with me." She breathed out softly.

"I'm not letting you out of my sight."

"I get it. I wouldn't trust me either but—"

"That's not it. You don't get it. You keep finding ways to nearly kill yourself and I cannot—"

He was interrupted by none other than Mack, who appeared out of nowhere, startling them both.

"I've really got to stop walking in on the two of you. I feel like the third wheel in a really bad date movie."

Willow's face flushed in embarrassment, and Ward cleared his throat.

"Can we help you Mack?"

"Coulson needs to speak with Willow."

She nodded, stepping toward Mack to go with him.

"Umm…no. She needs to see Simmons first. She has some serious injuries that need to be addressed." Ward argued.

"Ward…it's okay. I'll go right after, I promise." Willow reassured him.

"Coulson can wait. You need medical attention."

"I'll come find you when I'm finished." Willow stated with finality, leaving no room for argument. He watched as she walked away, the tension in his body at an all-time high.

His jaw clenched as he thought of the murderous things he would do to anyone that tried to hurt her again. John Garrett included.

* * *

"They told me you were injured, have you seen Simmons yet?"

"Not yet, Sir. I'll be okay until we're finished." Willow chewed nervously on the inside of her cheek.

"You sure? I don't want you in pain at my expense." Coulson questioned in a fatherly voice. Her body relaxed minutely.

"Does that mean you aren't getting rid of me?" She asked quietly.

"Getting rid-what? _No_!" Coulson moved around his desk to sit in the chair beside her. "Team BUS doesn't abandon its members. I want you to know that."

She let out a breath she'd been holding, but immediately clutched her side. Coulson gave her a pointed look.

"I'm fine….or at least I will be." She grimaced. "I just thought you might not trust me after what Skye said…"

"She definitely raised some questions that need answers—questions that are now clearly entwined with your past, but does that make me not trust you? No." He gripped her shoulder gently.

"I would understand if you didn't though. There's so much about my own life even I don't understand—but I'm _not_ Hydra. I could never be. They just…..they just killed my brother. He was inches from me and….the stole the last piece of my family I had left." Tears rolled down her cheeks, despite fighting them back.

"They told me what happened. I'm so sorry Willow. Is he the one that injured you?" She nodded, wiping away her tears. "I promise we're going to get answers. I've already given May orders to reroute our flight plan for Oregon. We have a S.H.I.E.L.D. safe house there and we can stay a few days while we investigate your parents lab and figure out why all this happened and what it means."

"Thank you, Sir."

"We're going to beat Hydra—and for the record, he wasn't the last of your family. We're your family now."

"Even though I punched Skye in the face?" Her expression scrunching guiltily.

Coulson let out a chuckle.

"Let me make something clear, yes—I'm partial to Skye. I've been through a lot with that girl and she's like a daughter to me. That being said, I'm not oblivious to her lack of tact sometimes and every now and then we all probably deserve a good punch to the face. However, I do recommend the less physical violence with other teammates, the better." He winked.

She nodded in understanding, an unexpected tiny smile present on her lips.

"Thanks Coulson. For believing in me….and helping." She stood to leave.

"You're welcome. Oh and Willow….just because I already have one unbiological, smart-mouthed daughter, doesn't mean I can't have two."

She bit her lip to keep from chuckling, knowing the pain in her side would be excruciating.

"Get to the med bay. That's an order."

"Yes Sir."

* * *

"Well you definitely have two cracked ribs and a lot of bruising. But knowing you, you'll heal quickly. If I didn't know better, I'd think you were inhuman." Jemma winked, wrapping Willow's mid-section with S.H.I.E.L.D. grade K-tape. "Have you always healed so quickly?"

"Um…I guess so. It used to be a lot faster—but I guess that comes with age, huh?"

"I suppose. I mean, your gunshot wound healed in just a few short weeks. Most would have been down for three months." Jemma explained. Willow could see the wheels turning in her head.

"I don't know. Maybe I'm just in really good shape? I try and eat all my veggies."

"Well, whatever it is, be thankful as much as you get injured." Simmons reached for a bottle of pills.

"What's that for?" Willow questioned, doing her best to stand.

"To help you sleep. After what happened today, I'd imagine-"

"I'll be fine." She cut off the scientist and headed for the door.

"Willow—"

"I said I'll be fine. I promise."

"That girl is going to be the death of me." Jemma muttered to a closing door.

"I should hope not. What would I do without my other half?" Fitz called out as he came in through the door on the opposite side of the room.

"You'd manage." She teased playfully, giving him a quick peck on the cheek. "I need to pick your brain. Have you ever seen a normal human….someone who hasn't been through terrigenesis….and isn't some God or Avenger, have incredible healing properties?"

"What do you mean? Like the way GH-325 heals?"

"Exactly like GH-325."

"Not without it being administered to the person first." Fitz replied, eyeing her in confusion. "Why?"

"Come with me. I have a theory."

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE: I promise the tension between Skye and Willow will be resolved soon. Skye is protective of her peeps (and hormonal), and Willow is jealous and angry and hurting-but everything will come full circle. Next update as soon as I can! :) Thank you to everyone reading!**


	20. Chapter 20

DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison/Cavanaugh is mine.

CHAPTER 20

Much to Ward's frustration, he and Hunter had been sent out shortly after Coulson called Willow to his office to retrieve another piece of alien technology that they'd finally located. It had been a relatively straight forward mission, in and out in less than four hours, but he was desperate to get back to the BUS to make sure Willow was alright. Bobbi had promised to keep an eye on her and referee between her and Skye, but he needed to be there. Willow said she'd find him after she saw Simmons, and he hadn't been there for her-again.

He took a quick shower when they arrived back—the BUS was quiet. Everyone was in their bunks for the evening—well most everyone. He'd grown used to finding Willow's bunk empty—usually when he needed to see her the most. He knew there was no way she could be in the gym with her injuries, so he checked the kitchen before he finally found her on the large black sofa in the lounge area with the TV on low volume.

"Can't sleep?" He asked softly, as not to scare her, and moved to sit down beside her. She had dark shadows under her eyes, most likely from crying. She shrugged in indifference, and his brows knit in concern. He was used to seeing her strong and capable—ready to take on the world—but she looked so broken. It pained him. "Simmons mentioned you refused the sleeping meds…"

"Of course she did." She said hoarsely, but managed a tiny look of defiance.

"She was only looking out for you. Your body needs rest."

"I'm fine. I don't need drugs." She looked away and he could tell she was fighting back tears. He gently took her hand in his, twining their fingers together and she didn't resist to his relief.

"I know what it's like to be afraid to close your eyes." Ward whispered. "I know what it's like when real life is bad enough, but the nightmares are worse…"

She slowly turned to face him, knowing he was being sincere after she'd experienced the aftermath of his night time demons firsthand. That morning she'd been so frustrated and angry at him, but then she'd lost her brother and all she'd wanted was Ward—and then he'd gone and admitted he had feelings for her and now she was a complete train wreck of emotions—unable to deal with any of them.

"I'm so…tired." Her voice was barely audible. "He takes everything from me. He always takes…..everything." Her body trembled as she looked up at him. "And in my dreams…he even takes you."

"Hey…no." He reached out, cupping her face in his hands, the pads of his thumbs brushing away her stray tears. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

She nodded, but he could tell she didn't believe it.

"C'mere. Let me hold you tonight like—like you did for me." He leaned back on the large couch and made room for her next to him. She carefully moved, trying not to agitate her painfully screaming ribs, and nestled her way into his side. He pulled down the plush throw from the back of the sofa, draping it over them.

"What if someone sees us like this…" She murmured, settling her face against his chest as a pillow, her tired eyes already beginning to droop.

"We'll deal with that in the morning. Right now, all I care about is you resting…." His fingers threaded through her dark hair, tenderly brushing it away from her face.

"Ward…"

"Hmm….."

"I'm glad you're here with me." Her breathing slowed and her body finally began to relax.

"I am too."

He watched her drift off to sleep, wondering how he'd been lucky enough to have this woman in his arms, let alone cross his path. He knew though, that all good things come to an end—that happiness was only fleeting and sooner or later something would inevitably happen. He just wanted to enjoy her while he had her, and keep her safe as long as he could—even if he wasn't allowed to have a happily ever after, he would do everything possible to give her one.

* * *

"How can you not think this is a bad idea?" Agent May whispered, as Coulson quietly picked up the TV remote and shut it off. "This could make things really complicated out in the field…"

"On the contrary—I just have this gut feeling it's all going to play out the way it's supposed to in the end." Coulson grinned.

"You're such a softy Phil." May rolled her eyes.

"One of us has to be." He winked to his most trusted agent as they left the specialist and trainee sleeping soundly in each other's arms.

* * *

The team arrived in Salem, Oregon at a discreet location of one of the many S.H.I.E.L.D. safe houses around the world. May and Bobbi had been in charge of keeping Skye busy, while Ward was on Willow babysitting duty. Coulson hadn't wanted the women near each other until he could be sure they wouldn't attempt to gouge each other's eyeballs out—but that hadn't stopped the pair from glaring and staring each other down from across the quinjet.

Willow was mildly impressed by their temporary home—the accommodations including a tiny kitchen, one bathroom and only four bedrooms for the nine of them that had made the trip. Skye opted for the couch, despite Coulson's insistence that she take the spot with May. Willow wasn't exactly happy about it either seeing as how that complicated her escape plan for later that night. Now she would not only have to get out of a room with the overprotective specialist, but she'd have to tiptoe past Skye in the living area to sneak out. She thought about begging Simmons to let her bunk with her, forcing Fitz and Ward to share a room—but that would draw a lot more attention to herself than she desired. She'd make due, even though she knew Ward was going to be royally pissed. The way she saw it though, she didn't have a choice. She needed to get to her childhood home and find some real answers—answers that could ease the questions that haunted her even in her waking moments these days.

If she had calculated correctly, it was about a two hour drive to her old home from their safe house location, per the conversation she'd eavesdropped on between Mack and Coulson. Guiltily, she'd slipped away while everyone was eating breakfast and made arrangements for a rental car to be left for her at a local garage. It would be about a ten minute sprint on a good day, and she had taken account for the darkness she'd be travelling in. When she'd stepped in the room she and Ward would be sharing, she breathed a sigh of relief, noting the two twin beds on opposite sides of the room. She couldn't deny that her heart and brain were waring with each other. Her heart wanted nothing more than to lay next to him where she felt safe and comforted, but her brain knew it would be a whole lot easier to get out of the room later if they had separate sleeping spaces. She slipped her packed bag under the bed and waited anxiously until nightfall, unwilling to go visit with the others. Call it stubborn, but she wanted nothing to do with Skye. She could barely tolerate knowing she was in the same building, so she only vacated her bed to eat and pee.

* * *

"Hey you." The door shut softly as Willow looked up to find Ward changed into his flannel pants and dark t-shirt. "You've been really quiet today. You holding up okay?" He sat at the foot of her bed and she sat the book she was reading down on the nightstand, smiling at him.

"Yeah…it's just weird being back here, so close to where I grew up." She leaned forward to sit up toward him, her eyes staring at her folded hands in her lap. Ward reached out and gently pulled her hand into his own, tracing soft patterns over her skin giving her goosebumps.

"You don't have to go to that lab tomorrow, you know? If it's too painful, Coulson will understand."

She tried to control her breathing as she glanced up at him, knowing he was like a human lie detector—and he'd already established that she sucked at dishonesty.

"I'll be fine. I think I just need some rest is all. We both know I haven't been sleeping the greatest." She replied smoothly.

"Then let's get you to bed. I think everyone else was just about to crash too since we are supposed to be on site at 0600. I hate that these beds are so far apart. I could push them together if—"

"NO!" She blurted out far too quickly. He glanced downward and she was sure by the look on his face that she'd hurt his feelings, or that he was onto her. "I mean, it's not that I don't want that." She reached up to tip his chin up to look her in the eyes. "I do want that. But maybe here in this strange place isn't the right time. I'm already on edge and I don't want to worry about what everyone is assuming out there. Does that make sense?"

"You're absolutely right. I'm supposed to be the one keeping this whole mess in check, not instigating." He nodded, looking away toward the window, but she cupped his cheek in her hand pulling him back toward her face and kissed him.

They both sat there in silence, eyes closed for what felt like an eternity. When Willow was finally brave enough to open her eyes, she was met with Ward grinning like a Cheshire cat, and she couldn't help it. She burst out laughing and so did he.

"Now that we have made it clear that we are a complete and utter disaster, we should get some sleep." She smirked, the weight in her stomach creeping up to her throat. _Would he hate her come morning?_ She'd briefly thought of asking him to come with her, but that would put him and his seniority at risk—and he would do it without question. She wouldn't put him in that kind of situation.

"Your eyes betray you." He spoke softly, and her heart momentarily stopped. "I can always tell when your mind is full of worry. I'm going to be with you every step of the way tomorrow. I promise."

She swallowed back her guilt as he leaned in and pressed the most tender of kisses against her forehead before standing up and moving to his bed for the night. He shut off the lamp.

"Goodnight Ward." She whispered to the darkness.

"Goodnight Willow."

* * *

It was around 1 a.m. when Willow finally felt it was safe. She slipped out from under her blankets, careful not to make a sound as she gripped her pack from under the bed and pulled it out. She could hear Ward stirring in the dark and she held her own breath as she waited for his breathing to even back out. She desperately wanted to kiss his cheek goodbye, but that was completely out of the question.

After she made it out of their room, she worked her way down the hall and to the living area where Skye was buried under the blankets asleep on the dark gray sofa. She quickly entered the code she'd memorized Coulson using earlier in the day and the front door unlocked with a loud click. She glanced over her shoulder in panic, checking to see if it woke up the hacker. Surprisingly, the mound of blankets didn't budge and she was filled with relief. Willow walked out the front door and took off down the long, tree shaded street. After she'd gone about a quarter of a mile, she stepped off the road to change out of her pajamas. She hurriedly shed her night attire, opened her pack and yanked her S.H.I.E.L.D. gear out and pulled it on, trading her slippers for her boots. The air was crisp, so she grabbed her stocking cap, replaced the pack on her back and took off running.

Twice she had stopped along the way, feeling as though she was being followed—but no one was there when she shined her flashlight through the trees. As she came upon the black SUV, she reached beneath the trunk space feeling for the key that was supposed to be there.

"Looking for these, Rookie?" Came an all too familiar voice. Rolling her eyes, she stood to meet the menacing face of Skye, who seemed to be quite proud of herself.

"What do you want?" Willow took a deep breath, squaring her shoulders—preparing for round two.

"Not gonna ask how I knew you'd be here?"

"Don't care." She snarked, even though she was now kicking herself for assuming there had actually been a person under that ridiculous pile of blankets. No wonder Skye had wanted to sleep in the living room. _Lesson learned_ , she thought to herself in agitation.

"I want to know what you're hiding. Everyone is so blinded by their new S.H.I.E.L.D. puppy—they can't see that you're trouble." Skye taunted.

"Unfortunately, I don't have time to stick around and confirm all the ways you're a complete and total whack job—so either give me the keys, or do something about it, _Quake_."

"Where exactly do you think you'll go? You can't hide." Skye stated in annoyance.

"I'm not running _anywhere_. I'm looking for answers Skye." Willow snapped. "Maybe if you pulled your head out of your ass for five seconds, you'd see you aren't the only one with questions. Now if you'll excuse me…" Willow snatched the keys from Skye's hand with unexpected ease. "I have a date with the truth."

She brushed past Skye, opening the driver side door.

"Like hell you do! Ward would kill me if I let you go alone with the mission experience of a toddler!" Skye moved to the passenger door that was conveniently unlocked.

"Excuse me?!" Willow's head snapped toward the offending woman.

"You heard me. Not happening."

"No. What I _heard_ was an ex-agent with zero authority over me, _pretending_ like she gives a crap about anyone but herself! YOU left them Skye! And now you come back after their hearts started to mend—and the only thing you can think about is turning them against me, no matter what the cost! I never wanted to BE your replacement—believe me! But don't hate me for trying to fix what you broke!"

Willow climbed in the driver's seat, her cheeks crimson from anger. She stared forward, inhaling and exhaling her rage. Skye stood still, and just when Willow thought she'd be free of the obnoxious ex-agent, Skye sat down in the passenger seat, buckling herself in wordlessly.

"What do you think you're doing?" Willow questioned, incredulously.

"I'm coming with you."

"Uh….no. You're not."

"Look…we don't like each other. Fine. But nobody is better at finding answers than me. Like it or not, I'm coming with you." Skye replied, some of her snarky tone dissipating. Willow stared at her stupidly, unsure what was happening. After a long silence, Willow put the key in the ignition and peeled out into the looming night.

* * *

"So where exactly are we going?" Skye finally spoke after an hour of driving in awkward silence.

"My childhood home."

The tension between the women was so high you could literally slice it with a knife.

"Look, I didn't…..I didn't want to leave them, okay? I was confused and scared and didn't know how to control my new powers and I felt so helpless. When I found the Afterlife, things just seemed right. They were able to help me in ways the team couldn't and….whatever. I don't know why I'm trying to explain any of this to you but….I love those guys. I would never, ever hurt them on purpose. So don't get that twisted."

Skye stared straight ahead, chewing on the inside of her cheek and Willow said nothing. She didn't have it in her to be kind after the nasty things she had said about her parents. Willow believed in forgiveness, but right now, she found herself believing in grudges more.

They finally pulled onto the long, narrow drive leading up to the house. The road was nearly overgrown with weeds and there was no porch light to greet them like she remembered from so long ago. The surrounding woods didn't look inviting like they had back when she and Liam used to play hide and seek for hours on end, and instead they looked deathly eerie.

She parked the car and stared at the decrepit two story house for a long while before grabbing her flashlight. Skye did the same and they made their way to the front porch. The door was old and splintered, and the paint chipped from years of lack of inhabitance. Willow habitually flicked the light switch even though she knew they wouldn't come one. A pang of guilt washed over her, wishing that maybe she'd have come back sooner—that maybe she could have salvaged what little was left of her real life—but she knew she couldn't have. Even now, the pain was just too raw. She carefully stepped through the entryway, her fingers tracing lightly over the dusty wooden table with the ugly red bowl sitting atop it. She'd watched her mother toss her keys in it a thousand times. She could still hear the twinkling sound they made when they hit the glass.

Willow squeezed her eyes shut, desperate not to break down already.

"You…um…gonna be okay?" Skye questioned awkwardly, a hint of misplaced care in her voice.

"I'll be fine." Willow swallowed. "Let's just find what we came here for."

* * *

The pair looked for what felt like hours, and maybe it had been as the sun was slowly beginning to rise and the house became a little lighter. Willow was giving up hope.

"There's nothing here. How can there be nothing?" She slumped down into the dusty old sofa, defeated.

"Maybe because I'm right and they really were Hydra moles and they kept their crap in an evil lair with all their other rotten lab equipment…." Skye muttered.

Willow's glare was murderous.

"Ok fine. Whatever. But clearly we aren't going to find what you think you need here."

"Oh, and here I thought you could find answers better than anyone….." Willow huffed out sarcastically, slowly rising back up to her feet.

"I can but—" As Skye absentmindedly ran her pointer finger over the dust on the frame of the large family portrait in the living area, there was a "pop" sound and the picture opened up from the wall. Willow's eyes widened in shock. "Like I was saying…."

"Luck does not make you the best…" Willow grumbled, staring at a safe that apparently had some sort of retinal scanner on it. She looked at Skye.

"Oh no….that is allllll you. I like my eyeballs just as they are, thanks."

Willow rolled her eyes and carefully stood on her tiptoes, lining her face up with the scanner. She held her breath, figuring it probably wouldn't work, but gave it a try anyway. It flashed a red light and nothing happened. She stepped back in frustration. "Another dead end."

"Well…at least it didn't blow up or something." Skye shrugged.

"Ughhhhh! There has to be—" Willow was interrupted by a loud automated voice.

"Welcome home Willow Grayce Cavanaugh."

The lock on the large safe began to move and the door opened. Willow's heart was racing so fast she felt like she could pass out. She timidly reached inside and pulled out a single, black flash drive with her name on the top written on an old yellow sticky note. She vaguely registered Skye mumbling that she'd go and get her laptop from her pack in the car, as she eyed the tiny piece of plastic with trembling hands. _What was on it?_ Now that she had it, she was almost too afraid to know. Knowledge wasn't always a good thing, she'd learned.

Skye made it back inside and they agreed to move to the dining room table. They reluctantly sat down beside one another and Willow handed her the drive.

"Will you be able to open it? It's probably 20 years old…"

"If something is on it, trust me. I'll find it." Skye squinted at the screen. As much as the hacker had pissed her off, she knew she was good—the best even.

With a few taps of the keys, Skye sat back in satisfaction, while Willow's breath caught in her throat. There was her mother's face just as she remembered it, right there staring at her. Willow and Skye glanced at each other before turning back to the screen. Willow's heart filled with dread.

"Hi my beautiful, sweet girl. If you're watching this…then I'm so very, very sorry….so sorry for what happened to us, to your childhood. I'm sorry you had to see some really terrible things, but mostly…I'm sorry about what we did to you—and what people will do to you in the future to get what they want. They want your precious gift…and they will stop at absolutely nothing to get it….."


	21. Chapter 21

DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison/Cavanaugh is mine.

CHAPTER 21

Willow stared at the screen in shock.

"I hope that Liam is with you, but knowing your fiercely protective big brother, my guess would be otherwise." Willow could tell her mom was fighting back tears, just like she was. Her mother knew Liam would most likely end up dying for her. Willow's heart clenched in agony. "Your dad and I love you both so much. We will always love you…..but it's time that you know the whole truth of what happened to us, and to you."

Willow's leg bounced up and down nervously as she tried to wrestle back her tears. Part of her wished she was watching this recording alone, but she was also crediting Skye's presence for the strength she was somehow able to muster.

"As you know, your father and I worked for S.H.I.E.L.D. in the lab near our home. When you were born, you had a heart defect-one that would have been fatal by the age of 2. We were faced with a decision-to let you die, or to use our knowledge and resources through S.H.I.E.L.D. to try and save you. The choice we made isn't one I'm proud of, but I would do it again in an instant. We chose to save you, and if you're listening to this-we succeeded…I just don't know at what cost."

"At the time, S.H.I.E.L.D. had Kree blood-the blood of an alien race at their disposal. Your father and I used, no….we stole some of it and used it to save your life. After many, many weeks of trial and error, we were able to synthesize the alien blood with your own-and the result was more than we could have ever imagined. When combined, your new blood contained phenomenal healing properties-it healed your heart almost immediately. We ran test after test and made the discovery that if we administered your blood to dying cells, it healed them too. We were convinced that your blood was the miracle cure the world needed to heal its many ailments. We named it Gracious Heart 325, after you and your birthday."

Skye jabbed her finger onto the keyboard pausing the video, her face ghostly white. Willow was sure it matched her own, but more importantly, something registered in Skye's eyes. She knew something. Willow wanted to throw up.

"GH-325. You. You're GH-325." Skye looked directly at her in utter shock. "You saved my life."

"What?!" Willow fought the urge to run out of the house. This was crazy. Too crazy. Throw you in a nut house crazy.

"Skye, what are you talking about? Is my mother literally telling me that I'm some sort of….freaking….alien medicine?! I don't…..no. I can't." Willow's hands trembled and Skye surprised her by reaching out and holding them, grounding her-keeping her in the present.

"As much as I'd like to tell you no….I'm pretty sure that's what she's implying. But um…on the bright side of all this, it would seem that you saved mine and Coulson's life….well, brought Coulson back from the dead….actually."

"So let me get this straight. You're telling me that Coulson is a zombie."

"I guess if you want to look at it that way…"

Willow felt dizzy. The room was spinning and she didn't know if she wanted to cry or pass out.

"Maybe we should just finish the video. But first I um…I think I owe you a big apology." Skye chewed on the inside of her cheek. "I was shot in the stomach twice and almost bled to death. Your blood….GH-325 saved me. I wouldn't be here at all if it weren't for you. So….thank you."

"You're…..welcome. I think. I mean…but…how did you even get my blood? I just don't-"

Skye reached down and pressed play, but this time she held Willow's hand and let her squeeze it like a friend would have.

"Unfortunately, the world can be a dangerous place, and the people even more vile and greedy than you can imagine." Her mother continued. "A terrorist organization, which I'm sure you know by now as Hydra, got wind of GH-325 and they threatened us. There was a mole in the lab, so we had no choice but to take our chances and come clean to S.H.I.E.L.D. Director Nick Fury about using the Kree blood. Director Fury promised protection for you if in return we gained intelligence for him."

"Oh my god. I have never be so wrong in all my life. The horrible things I said about your parents…" Skye's eyes closed in embarrassment. Willow squeezed her hand in a sort of silent forgiveness.

"Your father and I went with Hydra, pretending to continue our work on GH-325, telling them it wasn't finished yet. It didn't take long for Garrett, a Hydra leader to figure out we were lying. We refused to give you up Willow. We wouldn't let those monsters have you to torture and use for experiments. We knew he put a hit out on us and as I speak, we have limited time. We haven't been able to contact Fury to let him know who the man behind it all is. Hopefully we will reach him soon. We have instructed your brother to find the Director if we can't, to notify him that Garrett infiltrated S.H.I.E.L.D., and to protect you at all costs. We love you both so much." Her mother had tears running down her pale cheeks. Willow wiped away her own tears as she watched her mom trying to pull herself together to continue.

"There's one last thing you need to know. Your blood induces rapid healing when administered to others-and it increased your healing abilities, but if our predictions are correct, your own healing will likely begin to slow or maybe even fade entirely. There is just no way to know-only time will tell, and unfortunately that is something we don't have much of."

Willow thought about how when she was small, cuts and scrapes seemingly healed within hours. Now, depending on the injury, it could take weeks, but still faster than the average human. Even Simmons had taken notice of it.

"The only way to neutralize your blood that we have found-to take away the healing property, is to go through a process called terrigenesis."

"To become inhuman….like me." Skye gave Willow a sympathetic look.

"...it will either weaken your heart and you could die, or it will turn you into an inhuman with endless possible outcomes-but your blood would return to normal. The chemical properties of the Kree blood distort during the cocooning some how. We haven't had time to sort out all the technical details. Your father and I couldn't make that choice for you, and that's why we gave you the necklace for your 7th birthday."

Willow fingered the charm she still wore around her neck. She never taken it off, because it was the last thing she had to remember them by.

"It contains a terrigen crystal inside. Break it and the cocooning process will begin immediately once you breathe in its contents. I couldn't bear to do it-I just couldn't take the chance of losing you. But this is ultimately your life to live, and you deserve the right to undo what we did if you so choose."

There was a loud crash in the background and men yelling.

"It's time. Hopefully by the time you find this, you won't need any of this information, but if not….research Project Deathlok. Hydra-Garrett specifically needs your blood for it. I love you Willow. Goodbye."

The screen went blank and it was as if Willow had lost her mom all over again. She couldn't keep it in any longer. Her chest heaved with sobs and Skye hugged her, not saying a word, for which she was grateful.

Suddenly, they heard what sounded like car doors out front of the house and they both stood on alert.

Skye peeked out the window cautiously.

"We've got company-and they don't look friendly."

Willow reached for her icer, moving to the next window over.

"I count five."

"Six over here. Too many." Skye hissed.

"Wait…can't you just…quake them or something?!"

"I can't!"

"What do you mean…you can't?!" Willow asked exasperated, watching the group of men with very large guns speaking to one another.

"I'm pregnant!" Skye snapped.

There was a long, silent pause and Willow pinched the bridge of her nose.

"I'm going to hell."

"Excuse me?" Skye motioned for her to make for the back exit.

"I punched a pregnant person! I'm seriously going to hell!" Willow groaned under her breath.

"Oh for the love of…..c'mon. I'm pregnant! Not glass! We need to move!"

"To be clear…the father is…."

Skye eyed her incredulously. "Well it sure as hell isn't Ward if that's what you're worried about."

Willow's cheeks flushed, but she was stupidly relieved nonetheless.

They crept to the back side of the house and were about to make a run for it when two men came around the side, cutting them off. Wasting no time, the women iced them, rendering them unconscious. Willow motioned to the shed under the deck. As quietly as possible, they dragged the intruders inside the wooden shed, collected their guns and Willow locked them in. When she turned around, she found Skye with one of the gunman's arms around her neck like a noose, his gun pointed directly at her temple with a smile on his scarred up face.

Before she could react, a voice called out from across the yard. A voice she would never forget.

"Well well well….if this isn't my lucky day! Skye here was the payday, but you…Willow Cavanaugh. You are the absolute jackpot!"

Willow had waited for this day-to be face to face with her family's killer. To avenge them. But now that it was here, she stood frozen in place, just like that frightened 7 year old.

"Wait. Garrett. Is this who she meant?!" Skye's eyes went wide.

"Yes. John Garrett. He murdered my entire family." Willow growled through her fear.

Garrett slow clapped three times with a sadistic grin. "Ding ding ding. We have a winner!"

"Willow…we have a huge problem." Skye spoke lowly, trying to avoid the tightening around her throat. Willow eyed her in question-unsure of what could possibly be a bigger problem than the gun at her head and a mass murderer standing before them.

"Go ahead Skye….tell her." Garrett smirked. Skye narrowed her eyes in rage.

"I'm am so sorry Willow….but John Garrett is Ward's senior officer."


	22. Chapter 22

DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison/Cavanaugh is mine.

CHAPTER 22

Ward's alarm went off at 0500 and he wiped the sleep from his eyes, glancing over to see if Willow had stirred. He'd hated being apart from her, but he'd still slept better knowing she was there in the room. He found the small bed empty and unmade-which was odd if she was awake. She wasn't the type to leave it unkempt.

Rising to his feet, he stepped out into the living area, but there was no movement and he didn't see Skye on the couch either. This caused him to take pause because he knew for a fact that a herd of elephants could trample through her bedroom and she would still sleep straight through until noon. That girl could sleep.

He made quick work, scanning the house-convinced that the two women were somewhere clawing each others eyes out. He found nothing-no sign of either of them and no indication of a struggle or forced entry. A knot began to form in the pit of his stomach. He raced back to the bedroom, frantically pulling on his gear and made his way outside to look for any clues of their disappearance. At first he didn't find anything, but then discovered a single set of footprints in the mud of the driveway leading away from the safe house. He took off sprinting along the main road searching for anything that might explain which direction they went. About a half mile into his run, he lost the footprints completely in the overgrown grass. If they had moved to the pavement, there was no telling where they could be. Ward had all but given up hope when something caught his attention in the weeds up ahead. Reaching down, his blood turned to ice.

In his hands, he held a piece of paper with notes and pictures in Willow's handwriting. He'd recognize the way she dotted her I's with tiny hearts anywhere. He had teased her about it once, and now he was just thankful that he'd taken notice. There was a photo of her parents and beside it, a list of names. Each one was crossed off, a sort of process of elimination he thought. All except one that read:

 _John Garrett-murderer_

* * *

By the time Ward made it back to the safe house he was nearly hyperventilating from panic. He knew what he had to do, but for the first time in a very long time, he was afraid. The thought of Willow and Skye in danger kept him moving and he pushed through the fear, prepared to do what was necessary to keep them safe-even if that meant the team killing him in cold blood.

He burst into the kitchen, not giving himself enough time to change his mind, and found the rest of the team awake and listening to Simmons explain something. Ward locked eyes with Coulson.

"Willow and Skye are missing and I'm 99% sure they are in serious trouble!"

There was a collective "What?!"

Ward swallowed hard. "….and that's not all. I think….I think I'm Hydra."

"Hyd-WHAT?!"

"What do you MEAN you THINK you're Hydra?!" Hunter glowered.

"Well um….while we're dropping all these bombshells…." Jemma piped up smiling nervously. "We have reason to believe that Willow is GH-325…."

All eyes flew back and forth between Ward and Simmons and then all hell broke loose.

May leaped across the kitchen table, her shoulder connecting with Ward's chest nearly knocking the wind out of him, slamming him hard against the wall. He deflected her assaults, dodging her punches, but she was able to get a nice kidney shot in that made him see stars before Coulson's voice boomed over the chaos.

"AGENT MAY STAND DOWN!"

Ward raised his left hand in surrender, the other cupping his side to ease the throbbing. He didn't want to make the situation any worse, or cause Coulson to see him as an immediate threat.

"Look….do what you want with me Coulson, but you have to find Willow and Skye. He'll do things-"

"Oh we'll do what we want! Lock him up, I say! A Hydra mole right here under our noses!" Hunter barked angrily, the betrayal raw in his eyes.

"Let me finish him, Phil." May growled, balling up her tiny fists.

"You don't understand! If what you say is true Jemma, if Willow really is GH-325….the things Garrett will do to her and to Skye-" Ward tried again.

"Garrett?!" Coulson's head snapped to Ward. Ward nodded at him.

"You used them!" May snarled furiously. "You used us!"

"NO! I didn't know!"

"Maybe we should let him explain…." Mack interjected.

"If anything, maybe he could be useful in finding them." Bobbi offered.

"Alright, enough. Everyone out except Bobbi and Mack."

"Phil-"

"I said out! I need agents who can stay objective right now." Coulson ordered, pointedly.

Ward let out a breath he'd been holding. At least Coulson might let him explain his side of things and he wouldn't have to worry about Agent May being the last face he saw before he died. At least not yet anyway.

"Ok Ward. You've got one shot. Once chance to explain yourself-and you'd better make it good." Coulson's eyes were the fiercest he'd ever seen them, and yet they seemed to hold concern too-as though he knew things and was desperate for Ward to confirm it.

Ward nodded.

"Thank you, Sir. What do you want to know first?"

"Everything."

* * *

Ward looked down at the table, ashamed. He had started at the very beginning-all the way back to his childhood and his first encounter with John Garrett in juvenile hall. He told them about John's screwed up version of S.H.I.E.L.D. Academy and how John had manipulated him into believing that Coulson and the team were Hydra sleepers. He explained his meetings with him every three months and the torture they put him through. He told them about John's obsession with GH-325, and how it was clear to Ward now that he only wanted it for himself to create his super-soldier army. Coulson was just as furious as he had been when he told him that Ian and Raina were working for John, and Ward thought Coulson might actually punch a hole through the table they sat at.

"Raina needed Skye for testing. They said your blood was different and wouldn't work for Project Deathlok-but if he realizes that Willow is GH-325, he won't need Skye anymore. Most likely he'll kill her and then there is no telling what they will do to Willow-what kind of torture and testing they'll put her through. The look in John's eyes every time he talked about GH-325…..he'll do anything for it Coulson. I see that now."

Ward's head fell to his hands. He must have said he was sorry a thousand times, but it was never going to be enough. He felt dead inside.

Coulson was completely silent for what felt like hours, before finally speaking three words that made Ward's heart sink further than he imagined.

"No…I'm sorry."

This was it, Ward thought. He was about to be thrown into a dark pit somewhere.

"I'm sorry that I didn't see it sooner." Coulson frowned.

Ward thought of Willow. He'd never see her face again. Bile rose up in his throat.

"I had my suspicions about Garrett…" Coulson continued. "The fact that he kept feeding me intel about the one lab associated with GH-325. Fury warned me when I took over as director to be careful. He knew there was a mole, but his insiders were murdered before they could give names. My hunch now is that they were Willow's parents."

"I wish…..I could go back. I wish I would have seen it sooner, I just….I failed." Ward sat back in his chair, defeated.

"While I'm inclined not to trust you, I do believe what you have told me to be true….and your feelings for Willow and Skye are real. Not even you could fake that."

"It's not just them. Months ago I started questioning my loyalties and Garrett saw it. I believed I owed him a debt for saving me as a worthless kid, destined to go nowhere with nobody that gave a damn about me. He was my childhood savior and I looked up to him and didn't want to betray that. But I also started to care about you guys. I wanted so desperately to prove you weren't Hydra. You don't know how many times I wanted to go to Agent Hand to tell her there was no way this team was a terrorist group-that she was wasting her time and resources-but John forbid it. All because he wanted me to find GH-325 for himself…"

Ward scoffed at himself. "He always said I was becoming your lap dog….but all along….I was his."

"He manipulated you in the worst way, Ward. He pretended to care about you and used you for his own selfish needs. It was the perfect plan, honestly-and it doesn't make all that has happened okay, but….." Coulson glanced up to Bobbi and Mack. "I do believe you can redeem yourself."

Ward looked up in disbelief.

"I think it will be the hardest thing you'll ever have to do. Trust is hard to build, easy to lose, and sometimes impossible to get back. You had two choices though. You could have gone with Garrett-but you chose us. Now, I'm choosing to believe in you. Don't make me regret it."

Ward didn't even care that tears of relief were flooding down his cheeks. He felt a giant weight release from his shoulders.

"I respect you and look up to you so much, Sir. I will do anything I can to make you proud, and to bring back Willow and Skye. Even if I have to give my own life. I swear it."

"About that…."Coulson smirked. "If you think I'm the one you should be worried about-let me just say I don't envy you when we get the girls back and you have to face them. Good luck with that."

Ward swallowed hard. He hadn't even thought about that yet. Willow and Skye would both have every reason to hate his guts-but that wouldn't stop him from trying to rescue them. He could live with Willow hating him as long as she was safe from John.

"So…what now? We have to find them soon." Ward questioned.

"Now, unfortunately you're going to have to go to the holding cell in the basement." Coulson stood and Ward's relieved expression faltered. "Relax. I need you to go willingly while I do my best to smooth this over with the rest of the team. You being in that cell for the moment is the only way I can be sure that May doesn't kill you."

Ward nodded in dejected understanding.

"Be thinking of where Skye and Willow might have gone." Coulson added. "Anything could be of use right now. We're racing against time."

"I'm worried this was all a distraction. John said he needed Skye, and that she would show up sooner than later. I'm sure he fed you that intel to lure her here. I feel like the lab was a diversion for his real plan. We have to figure out what else he wanted here in this area…"

"Not to mention, Skye is powerless right now. Hopefully John doesn't know that." Coulson replied, worry creasing his forehead. "But if they get her blood, it won't take much for Raina to figure that out."

"Wait….Willow's S.H.I.E.L.D. file. It mentioned her childhood home being near the lab. Is it possible they went there? Maybe Willow wanted answers-she was unsettled yesterday about her brother's death. She kept saying she needed answers."

"That's a good start. I'll get Fitzsimmons on it. Meanwhile, give me a bit to get these…new developments under control."

Ward stood and went with Bobbi and Mack to the basement. In the corner was a tiny 4ft by 4ft holding cell, barely large enough to move around in. He took a deep breath and climbed inside, choosing to trust Coulson. Every cell in his body wanted to fight, wanted to be out there looking for Willow, but he knew after all his lies he had to believe what Coulson said. Maybe he could be redeemed after all.

"It's gonna be okay Ward." Bobbi half-smiled. "You did the right thing. I know it sucks right now, but if you're being truthful, it's gonna work out."

"The others will come around. It's just a lot to process." Mack assured him.

"If he doesn't let me out of here….please find them." Ward stated. "John Garrett cannot get to Willow."

The agents nodded with looks of empathy that he probably didn't deserve, and then the heavy steel door screeched shut and the lock clicked sealing him inside with nothing but his own thoughts.

All he could do was wait, and pray he'd made the right decision.


	23. Chapter 23

DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison/Cavanaugh is mine.

CHAPTER 23

 _"I am so sorry Willow….but John Garrett is Ward's senior officer."_

John Garrett, her enemy, was Ward's supposed savior.

Willow had barely registered anything after that.

 _Ward was Hydra_.

After everything she'd learned that day, those three words were enough to crush her spirit completely.

"Oh now. Don't look so sad." John puckered his lips making fun of her. "It's not like Ward even knows he is Hydra. He's the perfect little pawn-always going along with my every order. That's what makes him my best recruit-so easily molded and corrupted. Can you believe that kid though? Actually thinking he's one of the good guys?!" He barked out a laugh.

Willow's eyes were murderous as she stared up at the older man from her unfortunate position on her knees, weaponless with her hands zip tied behind her back. Skye was thankfully still next to her.

She let that information sink in. _Ward hadn't known he was Hydra_. Suddenly she felt a twinge of hope, but it was quickly overcome with the need to get her bare hands on Garrett's neck and squeeze until he could no longer hurt the people she cared about.

"He has the potential to be one of Hydra's top leaders someday except I fear Coulson screwed that all up. He's been ruining him. Making him soft."

"Ward isn't ruined you son of a bi-" Willow snapped, unable to keep quiet any longer.

"Awww…..did he win over your little heart just like he did Skye's? That's what he was designed for. He's the master of espionage. Don't feel bad that you got played sweetheart. Look at it this way….you'll never have to see him again."

"Shut up Garrett!" It was Skye's turn to lash out.

Willow's gaze was steely. "I think the real question you _should_ be asking yourself…is did _I_ win over _his_?"

Garrett leaned down and roughly gripped her cheeks between his fingers staring down into her eyes trying to establish some form of dominance over her, but she looked right through him.

"That boy…..I own him. He knows that, and he would do anything I ask. In fact, maybe if you live long enough, I'll prove it to you by having him finish you off."

"Mark my words. My face will be the last one you see before you die." She yanked her head back roughly in defiance.

"No need to fight it Willow. I made him who he is. You'll find out the hard way."

"No. You tortured him into who he is. If I didn't know better, I'd say you're threatened by Coulson. You didn't realized he had the power to completely dismantle your secret weapon without even trying. That Ward just might figure out you're a piece of dog shi-" The butt of his gun collided with her temple and everything went black.

* * *

"Willow wake up!"

She felt an urgent nudging and she tried to open her eyes and ignore the feeling that her brain was in a blender on the pulse setting. She fought the urge to throw up.

"Willow come on. We don't have much time!" Skye hissed. "They're making plans to move us to his secret lab. He wants our blood to make some kind of super soldier."

That got Willow's attention as her mind fluttered to the last images she had of her brother. They couldn't let that happen. She glanced around, taking in her surroundings and squinting to adjust.

"This is my father's old study. I know a way out." She staggered as quietly as she could to her feet. Skye did the same, using her own force to snap the zip ties around her wrists.

"Amateurs." Skye scoffed, as Willow followed suit. She massaged her wrist from the sting of the bindings. Fortunately, the idiot guard assigned to them was standing outside the half-closed doorway not paying them any real attention.

"The last bookcase is a secret door. It will take us all the way to the wine cellar out back." Willow whispered, keeping watch over her shoulder for movement. "You get the door, I've got eyes. Second book, third shelf."

Skye nodded. She tiptoed to the shelves and located the book and pulled. The door made a creaking sound from years of not being used, and of course the tall, burly guard heard it. He spun around and Willow quickly put her hands behind her back, pretending to still be restrained.

"What do you think-"

"We're sorry! She just needed to use the restroom." Willow cried out, trying to keep her face as innocent and neutral as possible. "It's been hours. There's an old toilet in there I promise. See for yourself."

He eyed her suspiciously, purposely letting the barrel of his gun swing her direction in warning.

"You stay put. No funny business or your friend gets a bullet." He snarled with a sadistic wink, heading toward Skye. Willow nodded slowly at her, signaling that she was going to go for it.

Willow moved swiftly behind his back and since he was a good foot taller than her, she slammed her fist hard into the middle of his spine. It did the trick because as he arched back in pain, she was able to dig her arm under his throat, locking it inside her elbow in a rear naked choke hold. Skye snatched the gun and pointed it right between his eyes.

"I suggest you move." Willow whispered into his ear. They walked him silently through the secret door and closed it quietly.

Skye wasted no time returning the gun to his face, knocking him out. Willow fumbled in the dark, finally finding the old lantern and matches that hung on the wall. After two attempts, she finally got it lit, providing enough light for them to steal the rest of the guard's zip ties, intricately tying his wrists to his ankles just in case and took off running as fast as their legs would carry them.

* * *

It didn't take long for them to reach the cellar and climb the stone staircase. Willow cautiously opened the door, while Skye covered her six with the stolen guard's weapon. The sunlight was bright, and she had to shield her eyes, but they appeared to be in the clear for now. They stealthily stepped out into the overgrown field, noting that they'd actually put some pretty good distance between themselves and the house.

Just when they thought they were making headway, they heard gunshots and what could only be John Garrett yelling. They spotted him on the back second floor balcony, and they all too soon realized that if they could see him, he could see them when his rifle fired directly at them. They dove for cover in the tall grass.

"We have to split up!" Willow whispered out to Skye.

"Are you insane?!"

"Just trust me. About 200 feet north of here, there is a huge tree stump. Behind it you'll find a hidden trail that my brother and I used to take all the time. It takes you directly into town. It used to take us 30 minutes walking, so much faster if you run. Get there-contact the team." She explained quickly.

"Why not just come with me?!" Skye's eyes were wide with worry.

"Because we can't afford to both get caught! Someone has to warn the team and the odds are better that one of us makes it. It needs to be you."

"I'm not leaving you out here with that madman!"

"Funny, a few hours ago you'd have sooner had my head." Willow smirked.

"Oh shut up!" Skye rolled her eyes.

"I'll go southeast. Draw their attention." Willow said pointedly, giving no other option. "I know this land better than they do. There's an old farm, well there used to be, about 5 miles from here. If I can make it there, I'll lay low until the team gets here."

"Here, take the gun." Skye held it out to Willow.

"No way. You have a baby to protect. Now go! I'm counting on you to make it!"

"Willow…."

"Yeah?" She asked, making sure the men were still far enough away.

"Be safe. The team needs you." Skye smiled. "Ward needs you."

Willow took a deep breath. "You too. If I…..if I don't make it back, tell Ward-"

"Hell no. You tell him yourself when he rescues you. See you soon."

Both women darted off, Skye staying low to the ground to avoid being spotted, and Willow, all but making herself a target. Once Willow was sure that Skye had found the tree stump, she stopped dead in her tracks turning to face the men who were at least half a mile away.

"You want your GH-325 asshole?!" She called out across the field. "Come and get it!"

Willow flipped Garrett a double bird before darting off through the trees, whispering silent prayers to let Skye make it to safety. Her life was depending on it.


	24. Chapter 24

DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison/Cavanaugh is mine.

CHAPTER 24

The trek seemed to take years, or maybe the art of growing a tiny human had taken a massive toll on Skye's stamina. She felt impossibly out of shape from all that running, and found herself breathing hard as she finally stepped out of the woods and literally landed herself on the back side of a convenience store. Willow had been right.

Skye had been beating herself up the whole journey—about the nasty things she's said, about Willow saving her life and then of course the fact that she was now drawing enemy fire to protect her unborn baby. Willow was a good person—which was why she was determined to get to a phone.

She hobbled into the old run down gas station that didn't look like it had seen but a few customers a month for the last decade and asked if they had a pay phone or any phone she could use. Of course the pay phone had been disconnected years ago, and the toothless, gray haired old man behind the counter most likely had never even heard of a cell phone. Finally after asking her a million irrelevant questions about the weather and getting sidetracked about the town history, did he end up mentioning a landline in the back manager's office. After much persuasion, she finally convinced Old Toothless McDonald to let her use it.

The office was covered in grime and had that old musty car engine smell like an old mechanic shop. She didn't even bother sitting down to dial Coulson, keeping watch out the tiny window, making sure she hadn't been followed. For the first time in the history of ever, it rang and rang and he never picked up. She couldn't even remember a time that he hadn't answered her calls.

"Dammit!" She hissed, running a frustrated hand through her long, dark hair.

Jemma. She remembered Jemma's number.

She hurriedly dialed the scientist and she picked up on the first ring. Skye didn't even wait for her to speak.

"Jemma it's Skye!" I need help! John Garrett is after Willow and we CAN'T let him get to her. I'll explain everything but—"

"We know. Willow is GH-325 and Ward is Hydra. Coulson has him in the holding cell down—"

"You know?! Wait, WHAT? No! You've got this all wrong! Ward is a victim in all this. I need Coulson! I don't have much time! Please Jemma!"

"Straight away!" Jemma replied handing off her cell phone.

"Coulson speaking…."

"Oh thank god! Coulson, Willow is in serious trouble! I can find her, but you have to pick me up first. I'm at some crap hole gas station about 2 miles north of Willow's childhood home. The address is in my bag on a sticky note attached to my red notebook."

"Got it!"

"Coulson, please hurry! At least 10 armed men are hunting her right now…."

"Copy that. Keep a low profile and stay safe Skye. We'll be there soon."

"Oh and Coulson….you need to let Ward out! We need him! I'll explain later!"

* * *

Willow groaned and opened her eyes for the second time that morning. She hurt. No, hurt was an understatement. Her ribs were screaming at her and she could feel her face was swollen. A large blood stain on her upper left chest startled her about the time an aching pain at the site nearly crippled her. It felt like something clawing into her slowly.

Memories came flooding back to her. She'd almost made it to the barn but four of the men had caught up to her. She'd managed to stay hidden long enough to take down two of them, but the other two physically overpowered her. She remembered being thrown on the ground and getting kicked until she could barely breathe. She still wasn't healed from her encounter with her brother—now there was no telling how many broken ribs she had.

The only reason they had stopped was because Garrett had arrived and said he wanted her alive for the experiments they had yet to do. He also thought it would be fun to try and torture Skye's location out of her. The last thing she remembered was a giant needle piercing into her neck and then nothing.

Now she found herself bound yet again, only this time with a thick rope that was tighter around her wrists than the zip ties had been. It burned into her skin as she twisted and attempted to maneuver the material. She continued to work the bindings methodically-lucky for her, this had been one of her better talents at the academy. She knew she could get the rope undone, but the real trick was buying herself enough time to complete the task—that and just the mere kneeling position she was in made her want to cry out in pain. The fire in her midsection had her contemplating if she could even go on fighting. She could also feel that they'd removed the knife she usually carried in her left boot, so she'd have to think of something else to use for a weapon, or hope and pray that Skye had made it and was sending help.

"Well well….look who's finally awake." Garrett bellowed. "Try a stunt like that again, and next time I'll kill you."

"You need me alive."

"No. I need your blood—which I can get either way. I'd prefer you alive for the time because you're an easy ticket to Team Coulson, but your ability to breathe isn't necessary sweetheart. Sorry to burst your bubble." He winked.

"You'll never get away with this Garrett. Your day will come." Willow snapped.

Garrett reached down, pressing his thumb into the open wound on her shoulder and she bit her lip to keep from screaming out in agony.

"You feel that Willow? Remember that pain. If you ever escape, you'll be looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life. We'll always find you." He let go and she took hard, deep breaths doing her best not to give him the satisfaction of her misery.

"So what are you gonna do with me then, huh?" She needed to keep him talking as long as she could. She had no idea what her location was now. They were still in the woods but the sun was setting. There was a green tent set up off to her right side.

"Oh….as soon as our transport arrives and we locate Skye…and we _will_ locate her—can't have her spilling all the fun details to Coulson now-that would ruin all the fun games we have in store for you, we'll be heading off the grid. To a place where not even God himself could find you, so we can figure out exactly how much blood you can lose without dying. Sounds exciting doesn't it?" He laughed maniacally.

"What, so you can make more of your super soldiers?" Willow pressed for more information. "Like what you did to my brother, you asshole!"

"Ahh yes. Your brother Liam. Such a brave young fellow, that one. Never willing to give up the family secret. He became our prototype—only we had to take extensive precautions. He was volatile, so we added a nice little kill switch. The second he disobeyed orders…..KABOOM! Blown to bits! Such a waste of technology really."

The way he said it as though her brother was nothing more than an expensive piece of trash tossed by the wayside had Willow struggling against the two men behind her holding her in her spot.

"Tell me….how does it feel to know he died protecting you? His order was to kill you and he disobeyed. Once again….everyone dies protecting you, Willow Cavanaugh. Protecting your secret—but now….I'm going to bring life to an unstoppable army thanks to you. Time to redeem yourself!" John cackled.

A fury ran through her veins, a source of adrenaline fueling her as she finally tugged the last bit of rope free, releasing her hands. Her right fist connected with the guy on the left's manhood, doubling him over so she could snatch his gun. With one swift motion, she used the butt of the gun to uppercut the guy on the right's jaw, shoving it most likely up into his nose. He collapsed and blood poured from his face as she rose to her feet, the gun trained on Garrett's chest. She was just about to take the shot when the rest of his men burst from behind the makeshift tent, guns blazing. She had no choice but to run back out into the cover of the trees as bullets flew at her back. She ran as fast as she could, but she felt a quick bite sting her lower back. For a moment she thought a bullet had gotten her, but then started to feel woozy and lightheaded. She wasn't shot—she was drugged, which in her case, was an entirely worse scenario.

Willow relied on her training- focusing, practicing grounding exercises to keep awake. Her limbs were growing heavier by the second and it was increasingly harder to breathe. She needed a hiding spot. It was her only fighting chance.

She collapsed to her knees, thankful the voices seemed to be farther away—or maybe that was the toxins that had her ears ringing. Her hazy eyes landed on a small overhang of rock, creating a tiny pocket or cave barely big enough for her. She struggled to use her arms, army crawling inside. With the last bit of momentum she had, she tugged some fallen down brush and leaves over her, hoping it would be enough to camouflage her until help arrived. _If_ help arrived. She tried not to panic as her body finally gave out completely.

* * *

The cell door whipped open and Ward knew immediately something was terribly wrong by Coulson's expression.

Coulson wordlessly handed him a black wristband that he instantly recognized as one of his S.H.I.E.L.D. grade trackers—impossible to remove, and enough to put a person down with the touch of a button. Ward didn't even question it. He laid it on his left wrist and it locked into place as he rose to his feet. It was time to earn some trust back. Coulson nodded at him in approval.

"Please tell me you found them."

"I'll tell you on the way. For now, gear up. We need to get to Willow before Garrett does. Oh….and I'd avoid May for now. She won't kill you, but she'll probably take any opportunity to cause you pain that she can. Best I could do with the amount of time."

Ward didn't even care about May. His complete focus was on Willow as he headed upstairs to get his vest and gun.

John Garrett was dead to him…..and if he so much as touched a hair on Willow's head, he'd put him six feet underground.


	25. Chapter 25

DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison/Cavanaugh is mine.

CHAPTER 25:

Coulson had given Ward the rundown of the last few hours. Apparently Willow and Skye had gone to Willow's childhood home and made the discovery that she was in fact GH-325. They'd been ambushed by Garrett, who obviously had no intention of meeting them at the lab, but managed to narrowly escape with their lives. Willow had sent Skye to contact the team, risking her own life to take Garrett on a wild goose chase through the woods and buy Skye some time.

Fortunately, Skye in all her recent paranoia, had put a tracker in Willow's jacket pocket but had lost her cell phone during the altercation at the house—and with it, her ability to find Willow's location. They were now headed to recover Skye from some convenience store she'd made it to so that she could hack the tracker signal and locate Willow.

* * *

The entire flight to get Skye had been mostly silence, but Ward paid the team no attention. He knew they had every reason to hate him—and maybe they'd hate him forever, but that wasn't important right now.

He'd never been so relieved to see Skye as she climbed aboard the jet, completely disregarding everyone—making a bee line for the nearest laptop, and sat right next to him, despite May's warning not to.

"Noooooo! Dammit! He must be using a signal scrambler. God I hate that guy!" Skye grumbled, squinting at the screen.

"Doesn't surprise me. Garrett loves using them almost everywhere he goes. He must be close." Ward scowled.

"Unlucky for the bastard—I have a program for that." Skye grinned wickedly.

Ward noted the bruises on her throat and wrists and he cursed under his breath.

"I'm sorry Skye. For everything. If I'd just opened my eyes sooner—"

"It's not your fault Ward. Garrett told us how he used you and tried to brainwash you." Skye reached down and squeezed his hand reassuringly, before speaking directly to the rest of the team. "And as soon as I can locate my phone, I'll prove Ward is telling the truth. I recorded everything."

Ward had to refrain from reaching out to hug the hacktivist. He definitely owed her one. Hunter suddenly found his shoes extremely interesting, but that was okay. With at least Coulson and Skye on his side, he could still have hope.

There was a flashing circle on Skye's laptop.

"Coulson….I've got a ping on her location—but she's at least 3 miles away from where she said she'd be. They must have caught up to her."

"Give the coordinates to Agent May. We'll have to land and split up for a ground search."

"There are at least ten armed men out there after her." Skye looked to Ward apologetically.

"If she's hiding, they'll have split up into small groups to track her. I guarantee he'll have James Ryan and Steven Cohen with him. They are his two best trackers besides me." Ward explained. "But Steven is a wild card. There's no telling what he'd do if he—"

"He's not gonna find her Ward. She's smart and strong." Skye stopped him before he could go down the road to panic.

Ward nodded, taking a deep breath.

"Ward, once we land, I'm counting on you to do your best to stay out of Garrett's way. You could still play a part of taking him down—and the longer he believes you're still Team Hydra, the better." Coulson stated. "Your priority is finding Willow and getting to the rendezvous point."

He nodded once in understanding. His fists clenched and unclenched as he tried to calm his tense body. He felt as though he was a ticking time bomb ready to either explode in rage, or to completely breakdown.

 _He had to find her._

* * *

Willow awoke to loud voices. She could hardly see, everything was fuzzy and white like she had cotton over her eyeballs, and her whole body felt like pins and needles like it was trying to bring itself back to life. She had no idea how much time had passed, but the sun had risen again. A wave of nausea hit her and she dry heaved into the leaves, trying to keep as quiet as she could. Her body trembled, most likely from the frosty night she'd slept through.

"Over this way—I heard something." A male voice shouted.

She froze in fear. Her vision was slowly returning, but not fast enough. She scooted backward as much as she could, willing herself to shrink out of existence. She was wheezing in pain as her torso felt like it was torn to shreds. She was fighting the urge to completely give up.

The footsteps grew closer until she could make out two of Garrett's hired muscle standing over her with guns in her face. When she squinted, she could tell the blonde haired one had been Garrett's right hand man back at the house, and the other one with reddish hair had been the relentless one who'd enjoyed kicking the shit out of her at the barn. She fought the urge to cry. _Agents didn't cry_ , she reminded herself.

The red head didn't say a word as he grabbed her by the arm, yanking her roughly to her feet, not caring that her head smacked into the rock above. She struggled to use her legs, the feeling in them was slow to return.

"I say we kill her. Garrett said she didn't have to be alive." Red head guy snarled in aggravation.

"No. She's worth more to him alive. The longer she lives, the more blood she produces."

"Please….just let me go! You don't want to do this." Willow pleaded with one final effort to gain the upper hand. She could die, she'd come to terms with that—but not in the hands of John Garrett. If she couldn't get away this time, she vowed to use the terrigen crystal around her neck.

"Oh shut up you stupid bitty. I've already lost a whole night of sleep 'cause of ya—I don't give a rats arse what happens to—"

Willow reached for the knife in red headed guy's cargo pant pocket and with a swift motion, she stabbed him in the torso—anywhere she could reach and took off limp-running as shots were fired at her back. Suddenly the shots stopped and there was a thud sound, but she was too scared to stop.

A strong pair of arms wrapped around her from behind and she tried to fight, but the last bit of energy she had gave way and she nearly collapsed.

"Sshhh….it's me. You're safe. You're safe Willow." The soothing voice whispered calmly into her ear.

"W-Ward?" She sputtered out, the world spinning on its axis. Ward was here. He gently rubbed his thumb over her knuckles and she relaxed, but only for a moment. "He….he said you were Hydra…" She didn't have the strength to pull away, and admittedly, she didn't want to.

He turned her around slowly and she'd never been so thankful to see his beautiful face, Hydra or not.

"Please don't take me back to them." Tears finally erupted, trickling down her cheeks. She couldn't hide her pain any longer.

"Willow, listen to me….I will explain everything to you I promise, but first I need to get you some place safe—far away from John Garrett."

"We can't….they…I think he put a tracker in me." She pointed to her collarbone where there was a dime sized wound hole that had dark lines coming from the sides like spider legs and blood oozed from the source. "He said if I ever got away, they'd find me."

"Shit! The nanotracker. The only way to deactivate it is to cut it out." Ward's jaw clenched, knowing firsthand how painful it was. John had put one in him during his fake S.H.I.E.L.D. training out in the wilderness. The tracker clawed its way inside, taking hold of the strongest tissues. "We have to get you to Simmons."

"NO!" She practically shouted. "Until it's removed, nobody near me is safe! You have to cut it out!"

"Willow, I can't—"

"Just do it!" She snapped. "Please Ward. He can't find me until I neutralize my blood."

"Willow what are you—"

"Ward please!" More tears streamed down her face as her anxiety grew. She was breaking down—because even now, John Garrett was violating her. He had been her whole life. "Please, _PLEASE_ get it out of me!"

The desperation in her eyes was more than Ward could take. Whatever John had done to her, he was going to make him suffer for it. He closed his eyes and shook his head in better judgement as he reached for his utility knife.

"I don't want to hurt you." Ward whispered in anguish.

"You have to. I need you to. I can take it. The pain it's causing me is worse than what you have to do. It feels like it's ripping my shoulder apart." She insisted through gritted teeth. He nodded more to convince himself. He drew a lighter from his other pocket, heating up the blade enough to hopefully sterilize it. She moved to lean her back against a nearby tree for support, tugging her shirt collar to the side so he could get to the parasitic device below her skin.

"I'll be as quick as I can."

She nodded, bracing herself for the pain to come.

"I trust you."

His eyes flew to hers in absolute disbelief. He thought he'd heard her wrong.

"I. Trust. You." She repeated slower, driving the point home. "With my whole heart. I don't care what Garrett said. I know who you are Grant Ward."

He was just about to speak when she forcefully shoved him out of the way before ducking to miss a blade that stuck into the tree above her head. Before she could move, the attacker had a death grip on her wind pipe. It was only a split second before he was ripped away from her by Ward, who was now breaking several of the man's bones. Off in the distance she laid eyes on two more of Garrett's men heading their direction. A gleam in the leaves on the ground caught her attention—Ward's knife. She quickly staggered to it, picked it up and with a not so muffled cry, she sliced into her own skin of her chest, opening the initial wound further trying to get to the tracker. Sadly though, that wasn't the worst of it. She screamed out as she dug her fingers into the opening feeling around for it. It had taken root in the muscle and she literally had to tear out a piece of her flesh to remove it. Once she had the creepy, insect looking device in her blood covered hand, she smashed it under her boot.

"Willow run! I'll catch up!" Ward called out, doubling back to make sure the blonde guy and red headed guy were actually dead.

Gripping her bleeding chest, she reached down and grabbed the gun from the last attacker's holster and shot him in the head without even flinching, before taking aim at the two new men that were now closing in on them. One of them shot at her first and narrowly missed. She vaguely registered Ward running for her, yelling for her to get down, as she pulled the trigger again. And again. And again. And again.

Ward reached her and gently touched the top of her tensed fist, careful not to startle her and the gun dropped from her hand and she collapsed to her knees. She was in complete shock. She'd just killed people. She was trained to detain, not kill.

"Willow…hey….Willow it's okay." He moved to her, helping to keep her upright. "Sssshhh. It's okay."

"They had to die. For what they did to me. To my family. For what Garrett would do to you if he knew you were here. I had….I had to protect you."

He pulled her into his chest and she sobbed, her tiny frame heaving with the weight of her pain—both physical and emotional.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so fucking sorry." Ward whispered into her hair. "None of this ever should have happened to you. I'm going to fix this. I promise."

Not far in the distance they heard another gunshot, startling them both.

"We have to move." He gripped her hands, helping her up. "At least a little farther. Can you make it?"

She nodded, and he knelt down, allowing her to loop her good arm over his shoulder for support.

* * *

Ward had tried to carry her multiple times along the way, but Willow was too stubborn for that. He was relieved to reach the rendezvous point, because her breaths were becoming more and more labored. She wouldn't have made it another step.

Glancing around he realized they'd been the first to arrive. He clicked his earpiece over.

"It's Ward. Do you copy? I have Willow at the rendezvous point."

"Oh thank god!" Skye's voice rang out. "The team is headed your way now. They lost Garrett."

Ward's jaw clenched in frustration. He had hoped they'd catch him so Willow wouldn't have to continue living in torment that he was still out there.

"Willow is in bad shape. Tell Simmons to be ready." Ward replied, reaching down under her knees to carry her to the nearest tree to let her rest. She felt so light and lifeless in his arms and his chest ached with worry at the fact she didn't protest him picking her up. "Tell them to hurry Skye. I'm not sure how long she can hang on."

"Roger that. Hang on guys. Help is coming—I'm headed to you now."

As soon as he set her down she gripped his hand unexpectedly like a vice.

"Please don't leave me." Her face was pale and she felt warm to the touch.

For the millionth time that day, Ward bit back his rage and gently knelt before her, cupping her swollen face gently in his hands.

"You said you trust me, right?"

She nodded, squeezing her eyes shut.

He pressed his lips softly against her forehead.

"I'm never leaving you. I promise." He whispered against her skin. She barely had the strength to reach for him before she lost all consciousness. "Willow? Willow no. No… no… no…stay with me. Please stay with me…."

He cradled her-protecting her until he finally heard the low hum of the quinjet. The rest of the team finally arrived as he carried her barely breathing form to the back so Simmons could take over.

When they finally made it back to the BUS, she was transported to the med bay where all Ward could do was watch helplessly while they worked on her. He hadn't realized he was crying until Skye slipped her arm around his waist, hugging him and Fitz joined them on his other side for support. Even Agent May gave him a sympathetic look-which meant the outlook must have been grim.

"She's strong, that one." Hunter coughed out, speaking from behind him. "That's why she picked you. She's gonna pull through, mate."

"She's the strongest." Ward croaked as he watched Simmons insert the breathing tube down her throat while Coulson and Mack held her steady. "I don't deserve her."

"That's not for you to decide, Robot. She made her choice—that choice was to get the truth-and you. Like Hunter said, she chose you. Now pull yourself together. She's going to need you now more than ever." Skye squeezed his hand. "We're gonna get him. Right now, be there for her."

It was in that very moment that he knew he'd give up anything for that girl on the table. Anything to just be with her-to laugh with her and hold her close. He had known for months that he cared for her-but now he knew without a doubt.

He was finally admitting to himself that he was in love with Willow.

Grant Ward was capable of love after all.


	26. Chapter 26

DISCLAIMER: No copyright infringement intended. All publicly owned characters and/or plot do not belong to me. I'm just playing with them. Willow Jamison/Cavanaugh is mine.

CHAPTER 26

"It's quite fascinating, really. Now that I know for sure she's GH-325, it means that I can't treat her like a normal patient. Her body literally resists traditional forms of medical treatment and slows down her healing when I try to intervene. Just the simple use of antibiotics and pain medications decrease her progress. I suspect that her arm would have healed in a matter of days when she was shot if I hadn't forced her to wear a brace. Of course I didn't realize any of this until her body rejected the breathing tube. Then it all made perfect sense." Jemma stared down at Willow's latest lab results. "Her numbers today are absolutely remarkable and her lung scans are fantastic!"

"But she's still unconscious…" Ward grimaced.

"I suspect her mind has shut itself down due to the excessive trauma-taking with it her pain receptors. Essentially her body is protecting her from the pain until she is healed enough. Again, this is in theory-because she is quite frankly, one of a kind. I plan to take some more scans of her ribs later to look for progress, but I would expect significant improvement." The biochemist placed her hand gently on Ward's shoulder. "Give her a little more time Ward. She's going to be alright, I promise."

"Thank you Simmons. For everything." He glanced up at her. "For keeping her alive, and for not totally hating me for being the enemy…."

"We all make mistakes Ward. Willow once told me that it didn't take two PH.D's to be a good friend and help someone in their darkest moments. That's probably the realest thing anyone has ever said to me…..and she was 200% right." Jemma smiled down at him before stepping quietly to the doorway. "This team is lucky to have you, even if they can't see through their anger just yet."

Ward let his talk with Simmons sink in, as he held Willow's hand, carefully stroking her bruised knuckles. He hoped she knew he was there with her. He hadn't left her side, unwilling to take the chance of her waking up alone. The first twenty-four hours were the hardest, listening to the breathing machine-hoping she'd make it. But then, her lungs had started working against the ventilator and her body had heaved and convulsed until they finally got the tube removed. Ward had been thoroughly convinced she was dying at the time, the sounds she had made, and the way her body was fighting had given him even more nightmares-but Jemma had insisted it was great news.

Now as he stared at her unconscious form, he could see that her color was coming back and her breathing had completely evened out. Her hands were finally warm again and he was feeling hopeful that she would come back to him in time.

* * *

"I still can't believe she's GH-325. I mean, you saw what her blood did for me." Skye absentmindedly rubbed her baby bump, as she sat on the opposite side of Willow's bed.

"It's hard to believe anything that's happened in the last week, honestly. Also, I owe you a huge thank you for having the foresight to record the conversation with Garrett…and also for not thinking the worst of me. I want you to ….no, I _need_ you to know that I had no idea they planned to shoot you. He kept that part from me because he knew I wouldn't have let it happen-but even after, I should have done something. Anything would have been better than nothing. I will do whatever I can to rebuild that trust."

"Ward, do you think I'd let you be my son's godfather if I thought you were a bad guy? Give me a little credit here." Skye winked. "And….I do trust you. I mean, yeah, I wish I hadn't gotten shot cause it really sucked…but your girlfriend here saved me, so now we've come full circle. Also, I'm pretty sure she'll kill you herself if you ever lie again, so there's that."

"Wait…..you said son. It's a boy?" Ward asked in surprise.

"Yes sir." She grinned. "Simmons did an ultrasound earlier this morning. Lincoln is over the moon right now. We were able to Skype him in."

"That's fantastic!" Ward stood, moving to hug her in congratulations.

"So yeah, this means you have a godson." Skye smirked. "Thank goodness, because I'm not sure you could handle a girl child of mine if something ever happened."

"Yeah yeah-"

There was a hoarse whisper that took them by surprise.

"You should name him Will….after his awesome S.H.I.E.L.D. auntie." Willow tried to sit up, but didn't have the strength.

"Willow!" Ward was to her in an instant, explaining to her that she needed to lay back. That she was injured and needed to rest. He gently kissed her hand, breathing back tears. "You're awake. Thank God you're awake."

She squeezed his hand and he blew out a sigh of relief at the strength in her grip.

"It's good to have you back." Skye grinned. Willow reached for her hand as well and Skye took it. Ward's eyebrows arched in surprise-clearly a lot had changed during their time with Garrett. At least one good thing came from the nightmare, he thought to himself.

"Please tell me he hasn't been hovering." Willow smiled tiredly, looking over Ward's worn out features. He was exhausted, she could tell.

"Understatement of the century." Skye smirked. "I told him to shower in case you woke up-that his three day old stench would probably knock you right back out-but you know Robot, here."

Ward scowled at Skye causing Willow to laugh, and then immediately wince in pain. Her lungs might be healing, but he suspected her broken ribs were a whole other story.

"Wait….three days? I've been out that long?" Her eyes were wide and frantic. "No no no….I've gotta get up. We have to find Garrett. He's still out there and-"

"Hey….hey. It's okay. You're not ready to get up just yet. You still have a bunch of broken ribs and we can't let them puncture your lungs again." Ward tried to calm her. "The team is working on locating Garrett, but they need you at full strength."

"I'm gonna let you two catch up, and I'll let Simmons know she's awake." Skye smiled. "Stay in that bed, missy….or I'll tell Coulson."

Willow frowned in annoyance and Skye laughed, muttering under her breath something that sounded like 'have fun with that' as she walked out.

"So, you two seem to have worked things out." Ward smirked.

"Aside from the fact that she was totally wrong about me and my parents, that she tracked and followed me without consent, and was a complete and utter thorn in my side at first…she's alright."

"Just….alright." Ward chuckled.

"Well…she might have redeemed herself by holding my hand while I listened to my dead mother explain that they turned me into some kind of alien healing potion, and she _did_ apologize and thank me for saving her life." Willow shrugged. "So yeah, maybe I am a little glad she was there with me."

Ward shook his head, laughing softly at her.

"But if I'm being totally honest….the thing that really won me over, was the fact that she's growing a tiny human….that doesn't have your DNA." Willow chewed on her lip as his gaze met hers. "Godson, eh? That's pretty amazing."

"You, are pretty _and_ amazing." Ward whispered. He wanted to kiss her lips so badly, just to prove to himself that she was really awake and okay and he wasn't imagining things, but he settled for another tender kiss upon her hand. He didn't want to risk hurting her, or overstepping any boundaries that might be there now that she knew the truth about his past.

"I am, aren't I?" She smirked, and just like that, he knew things would somehow be okay.

"Already with the sassy pants." He chuckled. "I'll take it though."

Willow's eyes lingered on him for a long moment, before reaching her hand to his face. He leaned into her touch, the warmth soothing his tense muscles from countless hours of worry.

"Thank you." She whispered, her stormy gray eyes not leaving his.

"Please don't thank me. I feel responsible for everything and-" He slowly pulled back from guilt but she cut off his words.

"Stop." She hissed through gritted teeth, as she tried sitting up once more in the hospital bed.

"Willow-"

"I said stop! He doesn't get to do this to me…..or to you. He doesn't get to worm his way between us. Not now Ward. Not after everything he's put us through."

Ward's elbows rested on his knees and he lowered his face into his hands, trying to put all his garbled feelings into words. He'd wanted her to wake up so badly, to be alright, but he hadn't been prepared to deal with the hard stuff yet. He met her expectant gaze. She wasn't going to let him out of it though, this much he knew.

"For nearly 15 years, I followed a man that manipulated me beyond belief. I was convinced the guy was my saving grace, rescuing me from a fucked up childhood. I let him convince me I was a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent-"

"You _are_ a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent." Willow replied with ferocity.

"I infiltrated Coulson's team under false directives to prove Coulson was a Hydra sleeper. I spent over two years trying to rationalize it all in my head. Deep down I knew John had ordered Skye to be shot. I couldn't prove it, but I knew-and that didn't stop me from following his orders. I nearly watched her die, and yet I couldn't make myself believe he was the bad guy-because that meant I was a bad guy. That's never what I wanted. Even as an angry teenager, that wasn't something I wanted. I despised people that hurt others-but I refused to see it."

Ward had stood and was now pacing the tiny room, the emotions spewing out of him like a freshly uncorked wine bottle.

"You are not the bad guy." Willow argued. "You save people. You rescue people from the bad guys-you are not one of them."

"I put the man on a pedestal that ruined your life. How can I not be the villain in your story Willow?" His eyes were full of anger, but not at her. She could feel the hurt of betrayal in his voice radiating off in waves. She wished she could get out of bed to hug him-to hold him. She wished she'd been strong enough to kill John Garrett when she had the chance. It was bad enough he hurt her, but the knowledge that he had hurt yet another person she cared deeply about, made her blood boil.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

"Why now? What made you defy John Garrett now?"

"You." He replied honestly, without hesitation. Her eyes flew to his.

"Me?"

"The instant I realized he was after you, that was it. I won't let him have you. I refuse to let him hurt you." His voice was hoarse as he moved toward her, sitting down on the edge of her bed.

"You don't have to carry all the burden, Ward. I'm going to be fine, and once I'm healed-I'm going to put an end to all of this." She leaned forward, ignoring the burn in her midsection. She wanted to be closer to him.

"Willow, I don't want you anywhere near him. After working with him all these years, witnessing what he's done to people-the thought of what he might have done to you if we hadn't gotten there in time…. " Their faces were mere centimeters apart now, but Ward's eyes were closed tight in anguish-as if he were trying with all his might to unsee what he had feared for her future.

"Ward-"

"I-I'm no good at this…" She placed two fingers gently over his lips and he opened his eyes, searching hers for the right words. He reached up, taking her hand, twining their fingers together. "I've messed up probably beyond repair. I've done horrible things, and hurt people I care about. The only thing I do know, is that I would die to keep you safe. You are the only thing that makes sense to me anymore."

"Nobody is dying…because you have a promise to keep." She warned him softly. "Everyone I've ever cared about….leaves."

"I don't care what I have to do. I'm not going anywhere, pretty girl."

Their lips barely touched as Simmons came barging in, startling them both.

"I leave for thirty minutes and come back to this?! Willow! You can't be sitting straight up yet. And you…" She whirled around on Ward who actually cowered away from the scientist, slightly afraid she'd hit him with the tablet in her hands.

Willow threw her hands up in the air in exasperation.

"Seriously! What does a girl have to do around here to actually get to finish a kiss?" She complained. "First Skye…then Mack-now you! For the love of all that is holy, I will lay down when I am damned good and ready."

"I…..well…." Jemma stumbled over her words, unsure of how to proceed.

"Let me guess. You have tests to run?" Willow reached for the cup of water on her bedside table but Jemma grabbed it and practically shoved the straw in her mouth to shut her up. Willow took a few sips, enjoying the coolness that soothed her irritated throat. She looked up at Ward who had literally moved to the other side of the room now. "Run all the tests you want. Ward is on his way to take a shower and then he's going to sleep…all night."

He started to protest but she cut him off.

"I don't want to see your handsome face until you've had at least 8 hours of rest. I mean it." She gave him a look that said, _ribs be damned, I will get out of this bed and make you._ "I'm in good hands-Jemma is thorough, trust me-as many times as I've landed myself in her care, I would know. I'm sure I'll be ready to train tomorrow, so be ready." She grinned devilishly.

"Ha! Not a chance of that." Simmons piped up and Ward chuckled, knowing she'd only said that to get a rise out of the scientist.

Ward chanced moving to her bedside and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"If you need anything….."

"I know." She squeezed his hand. "Get some sleep. I promise I'll be fine."

Even though deep down, she really didn't want him to leave-she always felt safer with him around. Her fear was irrational-she knew Garrett couldn't get to her here. Ward reluctantly nodded and left the scientist to deal with Willow's fiery attitude. He knew it was all part of her coping mechanism though. He'd seen her raw pain out in those woods. Sure, the GH-325 could heal her physical wounds-but what about the emotional ones?

* * *

The next morning, Ward had woken with a start, realizing he'd slept far longer than he'd meant to. He showered quickly, throwing on some jeans and a black t-shirt before heading back to the med bay. When he found the bed was empty and completely made-he practically growled in frustration. He figured he should be used to finding himself in this situation by now, but that didn't help calm his irritation that she was missing, yet again.

What he didn't expect to find was Willow and Skye sitting at the bar in the kitchen laughing and talking like old friends. Willow looked like her regular old self.

"What are you doing out of bed? You should be resting!"

Both women abruptly stopped talking and glanced his way. Willow smiled brightly at him and he suddenly forgot he was upset.

"I just…..uh….remembered ….I need to call Lincoln." Skye grinned. "Morning Robot. Don't be too hard on her."

Ward nodded at her as she walked out, moving toward Willow. She had her hair down, and she wore faded jeans with a pink t-shirt that said 'fight like a girl' on it. _Appropriate_ , he thought. She reached for his hands, pulling him to stand between her knees, looking up at him innocently as if she was prepared his wrath.

"I feel like a broken record, but you have to stop scaring the shit out of me. Every time I find you missing I-" His tone started out clipped, but he gave up, resting his forehead to hers.

"I'm sorry. I never apologized for running off from the safe house." She chewed on her lower lip and his fingers brushed over it, tugging it from her teeth, lingering on her skin giving her goosebumps.

"You should have came to me. I would have gone with you."

"And what? Had to choose between me and Garrett on the spot?" She frowned. Both of his hands reached out to cup her jaw, his darkened eyes boring into hers.

"I will always choose you. Do you hear me? Always."

"He would have killed you." She breathed out raggedly. "So I guess the truth is, I'm really not sorry I left you behind."

"You're not ever doing that to me again."

"I can't make that promise-

"Willow."

"What?"

"Shut up." Her mouth fell open in shock, but then his lips crashed to hers and she whimpered in satisfaction as she hooked her thumbs through his belt loops, pulling him toward her. His fingers tangled in her long, dark locks as they kissed-sinking into the relief of being able to truly taste her, being able to feel her aliveness.

"Ohhhhh wowza…..I um…didn't realize you two were in here doing um…. that." The Scottish engineer stuttered from the doorway. " I mean, you know…um…oh bloody hell."

Ward stopped abruptly, and Willow actually groaned in absolute irritation, peeking over Ward's muscular shoulder.

"Nope." Willow pointed to the doorway. "You…out."

Fitz's mouth hung open, embarrassed.

"Actually, you know what….no." She moved to stand, holding her ribs to support them, and grabbed Ward's hand. She dragged him past Fitz and down the hall to Ward's bunk. He followed after her, shrugging at the scientist.

Stopping outside the door, she turned and stared up at him with a certain longing in her eyes. He recognized that look of want, and for the first time in his adult male life, he felt strangely, and annoyingly if he was being honest, compelled to hold back.

"As much as I-"

"Open the door Ward." She ordered softly.

He hesitated only a moment before they were inside and she was pulling him to her as he closed the door with his foot. Her back hit the wall behind her and he tensed, worried she might have hurt herself but she made no mention of it before her lips found his again. His restraint was hanging by a thread as he fought not to go too far and take her right then and there as his. When he was finally able to get a grip on himself, he pulled back abruptly with a low groan of frustration.

"I'm sorry." She panted in embarrassment, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear, before flattening her palms against the wall at her sides so she wouldn't be tempted to reach out and touch him.

He didn't want her to be sorry.

He stared into the deep charcoal pools of her eyes as her chest rose and fell in deep breaths, before leaning back in carefully, his arms holding himself on either side of her head against the wall, just far enough away to protect her ribs. His lips brushed just under her ear, and again on her neck. She shivered, her eyes fluttering closed.

"I want this. I do. But not like this. Not here. Not when you were barely alive two days ago." He breathed against her skin. "You mean more to me than that."

"I know." She whispered, swallowing hard. "I didn't really mean to …well….maybe I did for a moment there…" Willow's cheeks flushed. "I just…. wanted to be with you for five minutes. Five uninterrupted minutes. No teammates. No Garrett. No lies. No pasts looming over us. No fears or sadness. I just wanted you for five minutes Ward."

A single tear escaped and trailed down her cheek. This was the real Willow. The impossibly beautiful and strong, sassy and unpredictable woman that he cared for, once again letting him see her vulnerable side. That's when he always saw just how brave she truly was. Cupping her cheeks in his hand, gently brushing the tear away with his thumb, he grinned down at her.

"Just five minutes? You wound me." He winked.

"God, shut up!" She smacked his chest with an embarrassed laugh, glancing away to avoid his gaze.

"I'll do better than five minutes." He gripped her chin, forcing her to look at him. "I've got the entire day off and I might have heard Agent May mention a pit stop at the Triskelion.

"Pretty sure that's the last place I want to be right now." Willow frowned.

"Me either. That's why, we're not going." Ward smirked. "How are you feeling? Are you up to a lunch date at the Botanic Garden?"

Willow's entire demeanor shifted, practically lighting up the room.

"I was about to jump your bones two minutes ago. I'd say I'm feeling pretty good." She stuck out her tongue, playfully.

"Careful with that tongue, princess. It's not like I enjoy resisting you." He traced a finger over her jaw and down her throat teasingly.

"Ohhh usually I only get the princess treatment when I'm causing trouble." She laughed, nipping at his fingertip as it brushed over her lips.

"You're always causing trouble." He leaned down to kiss her once more, before pulling back to add some distance-not wanting to risk losing control for a second time. She stood there chewing on her lip, unable to speak. Ward couldn't deny that he loved how much the space between them was bothering her too, but that lip might be his ruination if she kept it up. Finally she pulled herself away from the wall, trusting herself not to attack him.

"There's just one problem with your plan. Simmons will never agree to it." She huffed out. "She barely cleared me to leave the room this morning even though I feel great, and my scans were perfect. Bones are healed, just waiting on some of the swelling to go down. Other than that, I'm good."

"You leave Simmons to me." He winked, opening the door. "Get ready and I'll come back for you in a few."

* * *

"I can't believe you got them to agree to this." Willow genuinely smiled up at him as they walked side by side, her arm looped through his happily.

For a moment, she almost felt like a normal person. Not some girl with alien blood coursing through her veins and a serial killer after her wanting to drain her dry. At first she'd been a bit apprehensive, wondering if Garrett could somehow find them, but the temptation of having a day alone with Ward in the sunlight was too much to pass up. Plus, she was an agent. She couldn't submit to fear, no matter how much she really wanted to.

"Let's just say, I owe Simmons about a million field samples and she may or may not have threatened to give me an alien virus." Ward grinned.

"Well that's not really anything new." Willow chuckled. "And Coulson?"

Ward tapped his wrist and she noted the bracelet he wore.

"What's that?" She questioned.

"I agreed to wear it when I confessed I was Hydra. Basically, Coulson knows where I am at all times and can take me down with the touch of a button."

Willow stopped abruptly with her signature hardened scowl plastered across her face.

"You can't be serious. Skye retrieved her phone and played them the conversation with Garrett. How can Coulson not-"

"It's not for Coulson's benefit I don't think. Not really. Some of the others…..had a harder time accepting it." Ward grimaced.

"May."

"I can't blame her." Ward gripped her hand, leading her through the stony entrance to the gardens. "Besides, I wouldn't trust me either if I were in their shoes. They have no reason to."

"I'll talk to her. If I can trust you maybe-"

"Don't. I deserve her anger. And honestly, even though I've been thanking all that is good and holy in this world that you didn't hightail it away from me-that doesn't mean I think you shouldn't have."

Willow rolled her eyes.

"Ward…ok yes. I wish you could have told me what Garrett was doing to you, and maybe I wish that you had no relation to him. But you didn't kill my family. You aren't the one that tortured me. You are a victim to his madness as much as I am-but you were there for me when it mattered most. You did the right thing when you didn't have to-and as much as I hate John Garrett with every fiber of my being-I wouldn't be standing here in this beautiful garden with you if it weren't for him."

"How do you do that?" He shook his head in bewildered amazement.

"Do what?"

"Be so…I don't know…..fiercely positive all the time? It's impossible."

"Oh hush." She blushed, nudging his shoulder with hers. "You know I'm not."

"I'm serious." Ward strayed from the path toward a row of white picnic tables. "You never seem to see the bad side of anything. I wish I knew what that was like."

"It's not that I don't see it. Negativity is just…..exhausting." They each took a seat across from one another, and Ward sat down the basket of food they'd gotten from a local deli when they first arrived. "When I was younger, I used to dwell on the death of my parents. A part of me still does, but I try and use it as fuel for the cause now. I remember feeling so hopeless and lost, hiding from life and feeling sorry for myself. That's when I realized my depression wasn't changing anything-so I decided to join S.H.I.E.L.D. Academy in my parents footsteps, so I could rid the world of all the mean and nasty hope stealers." She scrunched her face playfully. "Positivity and negativity both spread like wildfire, so we have to be careful which one we choose."

"Is it too late to be you when I grow up?" He winked, pulling out her turkey sandwich and bottled water, placing them before her.

"What fun would that be?" She grinned. "I guess I'd have to hit up that Aussie pub again and take my chances with Blondie."

"Yeah. That's not happening."

Her eyes trailed to his and she was met with a look she hadn't quite seen before. Willow bit her lip, thoroughly enjoying this version of Ward. She leaned forward toward him, smirking.

"Could it be? I'm not the only one that gets jealous?"

"You have no idea how crazy jealous you made me that night." He admitted, not breaking her gaze, and she could feel her skin flush all over.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She questioned breathlessly.

"I wasn't sure of the right thing to do back then. But I knew I wanted you to be happy-and I thought you were. I didn't want to complicate things." Ward's eyes flitted to avoid her gaze now.

"You make me happy." Willow smiled. "Especially when you make that broody, angsty face like you're doing right now. It's quite adorable really…."

"Whaaaaat?" He sat back embarrassed and she genuinely laughed as he tried to hide his smile.

"You heard me." She teased, pulling back to take a bite of her sandwich.

"Maybe I _should_ let you go find Mr. Rugby Asshole….." He grumbled, playfully. "I'm not _that_ broody."

She sipped her water, an onery smirk tugging at her lips.

"He did give me his address…"

Ward nearly choked on his food as he muttered something that sounded a lot like 'break his hands' and maybe something about 'putting a soccer ball where the sun didn't shine'.

And after that, they fell back into their normal groove of being Willow and Ward, only now she got to revel in the fact that he wasn't just Ward. He was _her_ Ward.

* * *

It had been the best afternoon either of them could have possibly imagined, given how the week had started. They'd walked the gardens for hours, enjoying the exotic plants-the bright colors and sweet smells had lifted her spirits.

At one point, the male guide on one of the tours kept getting too close to her. Ward wasn't quite over the fact that she'd been attacked just days before-and as far as he was concerned-everyone was a potential threat, so he kept her close.

Willow would have said something, but if she was being honest, she was comforted by his protectiveness-and the contact felt good. The way his arm would slip around her shoulders or waist. The way he would subtly press a soft kiss to her temple, or the way he stood just enough in front of her as they neared other people, never letting go of her hand.

Others might have found it somewhat possessive-but not Willow. He knew she could fight-that she could handle herself. His simple acts weren't dominating in a 'she's mine' sort of way. They were simply saying 'she can take you on her own, but believe me, she won't have to'.

However, all perfect moments must come to an end-especially for S.H.I.E.L.D. agents. As they made their way toward the gift shop, Ward's phone rang.

"It's Coulson." He frowned, answering the call immediately. A group of rowdy middle school students on a field trip were causing a deafening ruckus, so Ward mistakenly stepped off to the side placing a finger in his other ear trying to make sense of Coulson's hurried words.

"Hydra infiltrated the Triskelion. There's no telling how deep-but we can trust no one. Garrett was there. He tried to overtake us but we escaped and lost him again. He killed Agent Hand and we are pretty sure he had tails on you two the moment we touched down. Get somewhere safe-we're almost to the BUS now. We'll come to you and maybe you can help us thumb through potential Hydra threats."

"Understood." Ward ended the call and turned back to Willow- only, for what feel like the millionth time, she wasn't there. His heart thudded in his chest as he scanned the crowd for any sign of her. This couldn't be happening again, he thought angrily.

That's when he spotted her, pulling against two men, one on each of her arms about twenty feet away, dragging her off. His fear turned to fury and all he could see was red. Willow glanced over her shoulder and locked eyes with him.

"WARD LOOK OUT!" She screamed, giving him just enough time to narrowly miss the knife coming for his midsection from behind him. He caught the arm under his elbow, disarming the attacker, bending his wrist upward with an effective crack before pulling out his icer and planting a round in the guy's chest. With precision, he took aim and managed to shoot one of Willow's attackers between the shoulder blades and he hit the pavement like a ton of bricks-but he couldn't get a safe lock on the second target.

Ward started toward her when more men arrived, three he could be sure of, moving through the sea of tourists. He weighed his options hurriedly. He doubted he could make it to Willow before the other three caught up-and she was clearly who they were after. The last thing he wanted was to lead them right to her. He'd evened the playing field for her at least, but when he saw the man grip her ponytail his decision was made. Ward grinned because he knew that guy was about to get the beat down of his life, he just had to hope they didn't hit her in the ribs. He turned his attention back to the other three, who now had him surrounded.

"Three on one guys…odds could be better…for you." He shrugged sarcastically.

He dodged the first fist, gripping his wrist firmly, smashing his elbow backward into splinters. Not stopping there, he twisted and tucked the guy's broken arm up behind his back-serving him up as a human shield while he iced the other two before they even had time to attack.

"Thanks for the cover asshole. Have a nice nap." He growled before putting an icer round in guy number three's chest. His attention turned back to Willow causing him to stupidly catch the brass knuckles of another attacker just underneath his left eye. He staggered back momentarily before the guy rushed toward him. Ward's swept his leg out from under him landing his enemy on his back and vulnerable. He slammed his boot into the guy's knee cap, the crunch of bones muffled beneath his screaming. Reaching down, Ward gripped his hair, slamming his head into the concrete below, knocking him out.

* * *

Willow felt the fingers in her ponytail and all her training with Ward had kicked in like muscle memory. Luckily he had dropped the hand on her arm like an idiot, so she gripped the wrist holding her hair and spun her body around. The man was easily 250lbs and over six feet tall, towering over her small frame-but that also made all the vulnerable spots more accessible. They stood face to chest and she wasted no time slamming her knee into his groin. He dropped his hands in pain letting go of her completely to clumsily reach for his manhood, but she quickly pushed his arms up and outward with her own, eliminating his defenses so she could uppercut his jaw with her fist as hard as she possibly could. As he staggered backward, dazed-she gripped his nasty, sweaty shirt, pulling him toward her-doubling the force of her knee that connected with a perfect kidney shot, dropping him instantly to his knees.

"That's what you get for touching my hair, _asshole_." She breathed, adrenaline coursing through her. "Tell Garrett I'm coming for him." Her voice was frighteningly calm as she landed her elbow into his temple, effectively ending the fight.

Willow felt a hand grip her hip, spinning her around and she nearly gave the person attached to it a black eye until she realized it was only Ward. He gave her a quick once over, noting the unconscious man on the ground.

"He touched the hair." Ward smirked.

Willow shrugged innocently, remembering the time in training that she'd viciously laid Ward out on the mat after he'd made the mistake of gripping her hair. It had been a rather victorious moment for her that day.

He kissed her forehead quickly with an amused laugh.

"Your eye is bleeding…" She fussed, worriedly. It was so unlike him to get hit. Willow suddenly felt guilty, realizing she had probably been a distraction. Him getting hurt because of her was the last thing she wanted.

"It's just a scratch. C'mon….we need to move. I'll explain on the way."

She took his hand, following him without question through the city, and hopefully toward a moment of safety.


End file.
